# Can I vent? Please?



## CoffeeGirl116 (Apr 5, 2011)

I've been dealing with hypothyroidism about a year now. I had antibodies present last spring, and when the levels went up between then and now (should have had labs last fall and did not due to huge insurance mix-up....they had us on a plan we could only see doctors in a neighboring state)....

Anyway, I was told I do indeed have Hashi's after last month's labs.

Here is where my vent comes in....trying to explain what it is to a family member, and that I *hope* to feel better once the new dose of medicine begins to work, how it can take time and I am trying not to complain because there are so many people that do indeed have it worse than me, or life threatening illnesses, but that right now I DON'T feel good; and she buts in to tell me..........

"my old dog had to take thyroid medication, we just put it in his food, it was no big deal"

I guess I've been told what she thinks....does EVERYONE act as if this is NOTHING to be concerned about? Or am I overly concerned about this? I know a lot of folks don't know what it is, heck, I did not until last year. But if this is the reaction I can expect I may as well not tell anyone anything.

Thanks for listening! I feel better.


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## Octavia (Aug 1, 2011)

Well, I'll share my experience...I only told about 10 people that I had been diagnosed with thyroid cancer...and I told pretty much nobody I worked with. (Just close friends so I could have a thyroid going-away party...why the heck not?)

One of my very good friends let me know that her sister had the same thing several years ago and is fine. Kind of a "no big deal" response, but her intent was not to blow me off...she was trying to reassure me that it would be okay. Which I pretty much assumed anyway.

Another good friend changed the date of our ski trip so we could ski BEFORE surgery instead of AFTER. Smart move. And she was really curious about the cancer, the treatment, etc., especially after a couple of glasses of wine! 

Overall, I would say most of the responses I got were along the lines of "yes, I'll come to your party!" Even my two sisters didn't know exactly what to say (and we're close). To me, it wasn't a big deal...I didn't want to dwell on the cancer anyway (denial? maybe.), so I took the "share the news, move on" approach, and that worked well.

Here's one way to think about it. Today, I found out that a co-worker was just diagnosed with leukemia, and I gasped. Leukemia has meaning...we all know what it is and what it can do. The vast majority of people have never heard of Hashimoto's, Graves, thyroid cancer, etc. What you're telling them doesn't have a lot of meaning in their minds, so they don't really know how to react. And some might feel too nosey if they ask you a lot of questions about it. An acquaintance told me yesterday that she gets tired a lot because she has a heart condition. All I could think of to say was "wow...that must make it really hard for you to stand up and do corporate training all day." She agreed. I didn't want to ask questions about her heart condition because it's none of my business.

My advice is this: if you're looking for support, you're probably better off finding a thyroid disorders support group in your area. Those people will know exactly what you're experiencing.


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## desrtbloom (May 23, 2010)

http://thyroid.about.com/od/bookssupportresources/a/letter-to-family-friends.htm

I hope this helps! Hang in there. It will get better.


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## Andros (Aug 26, 2009)

CoffeeGirl116 said:


> I've been dealing with hypothyroidism about a year now. I had antibodies present last spring, and when the levels went up between then and now (should have had labs last fall and did not due to huge insurance mix-up....they had us on a plan we could only see doctors in a neighboring state)....
> 
> Anyway, I was told I do indeed have Hashi's after last month's labs.
> 
> ...


These are the responses you get from folks who have not walked in your shoes. And we all know the poor dog can't talk. We get our dog regular labs which do "speak" to us to a certain degree.

I quit telling others of my health issues. That solved that problem. If you stop, they can't hurt you. Simple!










This is where you can talk about it to your heart's content. We are here for you!


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## webster2 (May 19, 2011)

I am sorry you received the response you did from your family member. I think so many people have differing degrees of thyroid imbalances, some are easily diagnosed and treated that many people think it is no big deal really that response is really common.

Octavia and DesertBloom have given great advice. For me, this message board has really helped me understand what was going on and also as an outlet to vent my frustration with no feeling well. So please join us often, you know... birds of a feather!


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## sjmjuly (Mar 23, 2012)

I was very lucky. My family has been very supportive through all this. I do feel sorry for my husband though, because I went undiagnosed and was horribly sick for a whole year. Oh the misery he went through,,,,,,
But I agree: Until someone else walks a mile in your shoes they have NO IDEA the HELL thyroid issues can cause. I literally thought I was dying - That's how crappy I felt. Sorry I don't have a really good answer for you other than keep your chin up, come here to vent and surround yourself with caring, understanding people. And most of all, take care of YOU!


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## CoffeeGirl116 (Apr 5, 2011)

Thank you for all your responses. Now that I have mulled it over, this person that said this is in fantastic health, and I know she does have trouble hearing about others, and she does tend to downplay most situations....like last year her dad needed a quadruple bypass and (publicly at least) she really seemed to just blow it off....just her way I suppose...she does not like to hear about ANYTHING she cannot control and this goes beyond health issues.

She asked how I was, and that is why I told her, I figured perhaps she heard it from another family member that does know.

My mom has been dealing with colorectal cancer, my dad had a heart transplant over 20 years ago, a friend has a child with neuroblastoma, so I know it could be so much worse and that I have a lot to be thankful for. I expected the comment about her friend, having a thyroid condition is common, but I was not expecting the one about the dog!

Thanks for listening, and I will check out the links you provided.


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## Andros (Aug 26, 2009)

CoffeeGirl116 said:


> Thank you for all your responses. Now that I have mulled it over, this person that said this is in fantastic health, and I know she does have trouble hearing about others, and she does tend to downplay most situations....like last year her dad needed a quadruple bypass and (publicly at least) she really seemed to just blow it off....just her way I suppose...she does not like to hear about ANYTHING she cannot control and this goes beyond health issues.
> 
> She asked how I was, and that is why I told her, I figured perhaps she heard it from another family member that does know.
> 
> ...


Even though your situation may pale in comparison; clearly you need to be well to help and be there for your loved ones. You can't do that if you have a health problem.

So................................stay on top of this.

We are here for you!


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