# Surgery April 10th and Petrified



## Nowensmama

My moms side of the family has thyroid issues... My great aunt had hers removed, my uncle had his removed, my mom and her sister are hypo and my aunt and I have Hashimoto's and a goiter. She developed hers prior to diagnosis and her meds got it under control. I developed mine after being on synthesis for 2 years and mine continues to grow. I've had 2 ultrasounds and an FNA which all lead them to believe its noncanceous but they always say they won't know till they're in there with something as large as mine. They aren't sure how large because they can't see the base. It's under my chest bone. I will have a CT the week before the surgery so they'll know exactly what they're dealing with. My windpipe is way over to the side on Chest X-rays and I have shortness of breath any time I walk very far. I know it has to come out but I'm terrified of the anesthesia and complications after which would be life threatening. I'll deal with the pain and adjusting to new meds, I just have this horrible fear about the surgery. I'm on Xanax as my panic attacks have gotten out of control this week. It took me from Sunday- Wednesday to be able to get out of bed. Today is the first day I haven't cried most of the day. So I guess it's working now. I have a 3 year old and a 7 year old. I stay home with them and they are my life. My dad died when I was 7 and I don't remember him. I know that's a huge part of my anxiety. I want my kids to have their mom. My oldest is scared. I've tried to not let him see how anxious I am. He thinks I have a cold right now which is why I've been in bed. He was glad I was better yesterday. He thinks it would be better for me to keep being sick that have surgery and is afraid they will "forget to wake me up". Guess anxiety runs in the family. Anyway, I'm rambling. Would love some reassurance or any tips. I've been told I can take Xanax before even heading to the hospital and plan to talk to anesthesia about my concerns. I wish I could do what my son wants but the complications are just getting worse and it keeps growing. My surgeon agreed its now or later but it has to be done. Thanks for reading!

Beth


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## jsgarden1

((((((((((Beth)))))))))))) I'm sorry you are dealing with such stress. I'm scheduled for April 16th and it's starting to get me nervous too. I'm sure you will be fine, you have to keep reminding yourself of that! You will feel so much better when it's all over and done with. Try and keep yourself busy so that your mind doesn't dwell on it. If you need someone to talk to, give me a holler on here with a personal message. We can keep each other company for a little while!


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## webster2

Definitely ask for something to help calm your nerves. It is not a terrible surgery at all. Your throat may feel a bit scratchy for a little while. Some people have iced their scar and found relief. You will want some V-necked tops for after. Sunscreen for your scar. I had a bit of an attention deficit after the surgery, I'd planned on catching up on my reading but didn't. I made an I Spy quilt for my grandson, so it wasn't that bad!

Also, if you are prone to nausea, let the anesthesiology folks know that. They can add something to wipe that out. If you have pain, let them know and take something for it. Sometimes the parathyroids get bumped around a bit and will cause some tingling in your lips, it is temporary. Definitely ask for some help with the kiddos for a bit.

I think you will feel better after the surgery. You must be pretty uncomfortable now. Put on a brave face for the kids. It is really not so bad. Feel free to seek reassurance here, anytime. There's a lot of people that have had the surgery.


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## Nowensmama

Thanks for the reassurances and advice for post surgery. Just started to make a list. Already got a neck pillow and going to buy a few more v-necks and a scarf for initially after so my kids don't freak out. And thank you for the advice on nausea. Yes I have issues. I threw up during my first c-section. I've been working hard to get weight off before surgery. Would have liked to be down more but have 15 off (tons more to go). Am just trying to do anything I can to be as healthy as I can so I don't have extra risks doing in to the surgery. Thank you again would appreciate any and all tips.


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## Nowensmama

Am relieved to find out that my thyroid is not substernal as my surgeon had suspected. (My original ultrasounds weren't done at the hospital and he wasn't thrilled with the quality but only had them to go on.) My CT showed it's all above my chest which was a relief (my aunt has a huge scar down her chest from having hers removed from far down). Surgery is in 4 days. I went and got my scarf and vnecks and new pjs and sunscreen. Thanks for the suggestions webster2! Amazingly all of my breath issues are anxiety related and my elevated heart rate is a combination of thyroid and anxiety (they did an EKG to be sure). I met with anesthesia about anxiety and nausea and will see them again before surgery. Everyone was wonderful and I'm doing my best to trust everyone. Thank you again for your kind words and guidance!


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## joplin1975

Hey, Beth.

Listen, it's a scary, scary thing to have someone cut into your neck. I cried, and then cried, and then cried some more. One time, my husband found me in our bathtub, no water and fully clothed, clutching my poor 12 year old cat to my chest and hyperventilating. It was ugly.

A good friend of mine told me this: you are going to check into the hospital, change into an ugly gown, take a nap, and wake up. That's it.

Lemme tell ya: I was so mad when she said that. I thought she was minimizing my fears. But, in reality? That's *exactly* what happened. After I got back to my room, I was up, walking, talking, drinking, and ticked off that no one would feed me.  No pain...I did experience weird hormonal stuff (hot flashes, agitation, etc.), but it wasn't awful. Slight throat soreness, slight neck stiffness, but really? The worst was heartburn from not eating. You are going to be just fine!

I just had a nasty ankle fracture and had seven screws and a plate put in my ankle. I'd take thyroid surgery any day!


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## Octavia

joplin1975 said:


> A good friend of mine told me this: you are going to check into the hospital, change into an ugly gown, take a nap, and wake up. That's it.
> 
> Lemme tell ya: I was so mad when she said that. I thought she was minimizing my fears. But, in reality? That's *exactly* what happened.


Such an accurate description.

I had no idea what to expect with my first surgery (I had never had surgery before, I was not a member here yet, and didn't even know about these boards)...turns out, the worst part for me was the (quite severe) nausea afterwards. I did not know to tell the anesthesiologist that I am prone to motion sickness, and nobody asked. Ugh. I'm glad you've already talked to your doctor about this.

I ended up having a second surgery a few weeks later, and I really had no concerns about it, simply because the first one was so easy. For my second surgery, I told them (probably no fewer than 50 times) about my motion sickness/nausea, and they did something different with the anesthesia, and OMG...what a difference! I was up, walking around, playing cards, etc. very shortly after surgery--no nausea whatsoever. It really was just a nap in an ugly gown, just like joplin said!

Seriously, I totally understand your anxiety given the loss of your father when you were 7, but as long as you have trust in your surgeon and his/her team, and they have lots of experience doing thyroidectomies, I believe you will be amazed after your surgery and say "that wasn't so bad, after all..." Really.


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## Nowensmama

Thank you all so much! It's nice to hear others shared in the anxiety and that the reality was a nap in an ugly gown =) I wish I could do something to lesson the anxiety but I guess the good thing is that come Thursday, the anxiety and my thyroid should both be gone! I do trust my surgeon so much. He's been doing these for 30 years (I was shocked when he said that cause he doesn't look old enough for that to be possible!) and does 2-5 a week. He believes in slow and steady so he's told me it will be long. He likes to be careful, minimize bloodloss, and do his best to preserve the parathyroids. Again thank you all. Hope to be on here late next week encouraging others! (And asking for tips on my levels!) =)


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## webster2

Definitely ask for something for nausea, if you are prone to that. After my first surgery, I threw up on my parents. They didn't stop by after the second one! Joplin's friend described it accurately, ugly gown and a big nap. Best to you!


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## Lovlkn

I was a nervous wreck before my TT and took Lorazapam to help me deal with the anxiety.

Post TT - I felt fantastic - it took awhile for me to get my replacement right but it was alot better than taking anti thyroid meds. Be sure to have your FT-4 and FT-3 tested every time and only dose by those and how you feel.

My surgery was 27 hours door to door. My surgery lasted approx 90 minutes. Ice on the incision helped alot.

If you have nausea issues tell them when you get to the hospital and they anesthesiologist will give you proper meds to help with nausea.


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## brookshire

While recovering from my own surgery I've been watching a lot of talk shows on TV. The other day I heard someone say she was afraid of having surgery and a doctor told her that that wasn't bad. That was the sign of an educated patient. It's smart to be anxious about surgery.

That said, for a young person who doesn't seem to have cancer you will no doubt be fine. In fact, I would guess that the biggest danger you'll face is that you will try to do too much too soon afterward. It sounds terrible to have your throat cut into but it really isn't that bad. I could do simple things for myself the next day--something that wasn't possible after a c-section.

Try to be as positive as possible. Think of how good you're going to feel without that nasty goiter. Be glad that you have the availability of surgery. I've learned quite recently that thyroid problems respond to and require a positive attitude because the big thing that thyroid disease does is make you feel crazy.

My prayers are with you. You go for surgery and I go back to work the same day. Let's say a prayer for each other, okay?


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## Kacot

My TT and central dissection was six weeks ago. My biggest surprise was the minimal pain. I had no pain at the incision, a bit of throat pain for two days due to the breathing tube. I was also surprised by how long the anesthesia took to get out of my system. I know we are all different, but I felt the effects for a solid week and perhaps even a bit longer. Blurred vision, brain fog, and dizziness. Last week I have started to feel almost back to normal. I also had the sense that it was such a small neat incision that outwardly healed so quickly and cleanly that I should be bouncing back faster. I finally came to the realization that a major controlling gland has been removed from my body and that I need to be patient and give my body time to adjust. I wish you all the best. This is a great site for information, an understanding ear to vent to and many compassionate friends. Take care!


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## Nowensmama

Will for sure say a prayer for your Brookshire! Hope going back to work is a smooth transition! Thank you for the kind words.

This site is so wonderful and I'm so thankful to have found it. Every night I'm able to share with my husband all the encouragement and tips that are shared with me and I think it makes us both feel so much better. I'm surprisingly calm today as it's getting closer.

I will for sure take it easy afterward.. especially after the mention of how much better you feel than after a c-section. I didn't sit still at all once released from the hospital after those so this time I will try to let my body heal even though I'll hopefully be feeling so good =)

Thanks again! Don't think I can say it enough. Packing my bag this morning so I can forget about that part and try to enjoy the rest of today and tomorrow with my boys!


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## jsgarden1

Just popping in to see how you are doing Nowensmama  Hope you are staying nice and calm! And to add, you are right, this site is awesome, simply awesome. The more I read, the more I am ready to evict that lousy thyroid!


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## Nowensmama

I was actually doing well today.. nice and calm.. Until my sister-in-law called. She's supposed to be coming to town to help with my boys. My youngest (he just turned 3) has issues with strangers. She's a stranger to him. Sees the kids maybe once a year. She isn't getting here until 6pm tomorrow.. he goes to bed at 7.. and we'll be gone to the hospital when he wakes up on Wednesday. Yet something else to worry about. So now, we thought we had everything settled so I didn't have to worry anything other than the surgery (since that causes plenty of anxiety) and now this. My solution for now is to take my xanex and go to bed early tonight when the boys do and try to figure it all out tomorrow. My oldest is so easy because he has great friends at his school and their moms are wonderful and have offered to help with him in any way they can, all of which is exciting to him! While my youngest is happiest when his mama and daddy are home. Guess it's just one day and we'll all make it through it!


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## Nowensmama

Really freaking out tonight and wanting to cancel the surgery. I think my husband is nearing his limit of patience. He has no clue what to so for me some there's nothing anyone can do. I'm so worried I'll be that tiny percentage that something horrible happens to either during surgery or soon after. I just needed to voice it cause its ok my head making me crazy and the xanex is not working right now. I feel like I need to get thousands of things in place for my boys. I hate this. And hate feeling crazy and I hate even more that there's nothing that can help me cause my worries are always a possibility even if its so small.


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## Kacot

Breathe........breathe deep. A dear friend gave me a great book and cd on preparing yourself for surgery. Basically it is all about breathing slowly,self hypnosis, centering yourself and asking others to send healing thoughts your way during your proceedure. I know what your are going through. I was there also, but the breathing does help. My thoughts are with you.


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## joplin1975

Agreed, just keep breathing.

Seriously, after surgery I wanted to go back in time and kick my own arse for being so nervous. I couldn't believe how good I felt, how easy it was, and how quickly I got back to normal.


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## brookshire

Nowensmama said:


> Will for sure say a prayer for your Brookshire! Hope going back to work is a smooth transition! Thank you for the kind words.


I'm praying for you, lady. I'm sure you'll do very well. When you feel like it let us know but no hurry.

I'm back at work but not going to stay all day. I'm feeling a little weak and wobbily but since I work for an HMO everyone is attuned to illness and medical treatments. They're all being really patient. Also, we've been under a lot of stress for the last 2 years and there's been a lot of thyroid disease going on. Imagine that! I'm getting sympathy.

Get well soon but also enjoy the rest.


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## Andros

Nowensmama said:


> Really freaking out tonight and wanting to cancel the surgery. I think my husband is nearing his limit of patience. He has no clue what to so for me some there's nothing anyone can do. I'm so worried I'll be that tiny percentage that something horrible happens to either during surgery or soon after. I just needed to voice it cause its ok my head making me crazy and the xanex is not working right now. I feel like I need to get thousands of things in place for my boys. I hate this. And hate feeling crazy and I hate even more that there's nothing that can help me cause my worries are always a possibility even if its so small.


Saying prayers for you and sending "good" thoughts!


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## JudithP3

Scheduled for Near Total Thyroidectomy on Tuesday April 23 myself... They can't do a biopsy ahead as the larger mass is calcified so they will do the near total and then if pathology is bad I have to go back in within 8 days (to try and save the larynx nerves). I'm not so nervous about cancer I'm more nervous to possibly lose my voice!!! When I met with the surgeon this week.. (very nice guy and the area expert) He asked if I had any more questions and I said no just a thought.. he said what's that? I said "Well, I'm wondering why I'm paying you to 'slit my throat' when there are so many men from my past that would probably do it for free".. lol He cracked up... I know this is not a funny situation but I have to keep my sense of humor so I don't crumble.  Good luck to everyone that is scheduled for surgery like I am.


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## Octavia

Judith, it sure would be nice to know biopsy results before your surgery...can you get a second opinion on doing an FNA on that calcified nodule? Many here have had calcified nodules biopsied. Alternatively, are they doing a "frozen section" pathology DURING your surgery? They're not 100% reliable, but if it appears to be definitively cancerous, they can decide to take it all out in your initial surgery, saving you from a second surgery.

I say this speaking from experience...I had to go in for that second surgery. My FNA was inconclusive, and my frozen section was negative for cancer. But my "real" pathology did show definitive cancer, so I had to go in for the completion thyroidectomy. It's not a horrible plan, but jeez, if you can avoid that second surgery through one or both of the things I mentioned above, it'll be a better experience all around.

Keep us posted. And I do like your sense of humor!


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## Octavia

Nowensmama, how are you doing? We're thinking about you...


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## jsgarden1

Came to see how Nowensmama is doing. Hoping you breezed right through it!


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## JudithP3

Octavia I've had 2 opinions already and they both agree that there is no other way. They don't want to mess around with inconclusive FNA etc because the mass is so large that it's affecting my speech and swallowing so it has to come out anyway. There are more than one too just the big one is causing problems. So I'm ok with things this way, he said if he has to do the second one it will be before anything heals... just will prolong my off work time. We'll see how this goes!!


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## MaaDoo

I would love to hear how Nowensmama surgery went. My surgery is the 18th and of course the closer it gets, the more nervous I'm getting.


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## Nowensmama

Thanks for checking in on me. Anesthesia did a phenomenal job and I remember kissing my husband and then waking up in recovery. Am home today as my calcium levels seem to be back to normal and my drains looked good. I have chest pain as the goiter was in fact under my sternum. The surgeon said it would be sore because he pretty much reached in and scooped out the goiter. It was the size of my fist! Am exhausted today with a tired voice and aches all over (shoulders and neck I'm guessing due to the position I was in for the surgery?). So beyond glad its over with. Hoping I get off Percocet soon. It makes me feel awful but I still have quite a bit if pain. I was super lucky and got my period the morning of surgery too. An just thankful to be on the other side of al of this now. Will be sure to stick around to encourage others once the "fog" has lifted. Thank you all so much for your encouragement and understanding.


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## jsgarden1

Awww Nowensmama, I'm so glad it's over for you. Did you have problems with your calcium levels in the hospital? I'm sorry to hear it was under your sternum, my gosh. Just try and rest and take good care of yourself. Again, so relieved for you!

Debbie


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## Nowensmama

My calcium was slightly below normal when they first took it and dropped again the next day, but then started going back up again and was normal by the time I went home. I'm taking calcium 3 times a day. He was confident my parathyroid a were intact and some blood test confirmed they were working after so he's thinking this boost in calcium this week should put me in a good place and then I'll just take a once daily supplement. I'm still not eating much. No desire and also some stuff just feels weird going down. Tried watermelon this morning and that was blah. My goal is to get off the Percocet today. Switched to Tylenol this afternoon. It isn't any better or worse but I'm not foggy so that's better . Follow up is Friday and hope to be feeling close to normal this weekend. Have no energy right now. Am on 125 synthroid.


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## Octavia

Thanks for the update, Nowensmama. Boy, if that goiter was in your sternum, aren't you glad you got it out of there?

125 mcg Synthroid is a great starting point!

Congrats on making it to the other side of the fence. I know it was not easy for you.


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## brookshire

Nowensmama said:


> I have chest pain as the goiter was in fact under my sternum. The surgeon said it would be sore because he pretty much reached in and scooped out the goiter. It was the size of my fist!


I would guess you would be exhausted! Take care and get plenty of rest and have good nutritious food. You've been through a big ordeal.

My prayers are still with you.


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## Nowensmama

Thanks all! I kind of expected to be further along and able to do more by this point. Am for sure glad I had it our knowing it was as low as it was. Can't imagine if I'd let it grown any bigger cause my chest is so sore. Yesterday I swept 2 rooms in the house and them took a 4 hour nap! Hoping I get my energy back soon. Our house is on the market and we blocked it from showings right now but it's back on Saturday and we have an open house Sunday so I need to be at least a bit of a help! Thankfully my mom is staying with us through next week. My little guys are ready to have their Mama back!


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## Andros

Nowensmama said:


> Thanks all! I kind of expected to be further along and able to do more by this point. Am for sure glad I had it our knowing it was as low as it was. Can't imagine if I'd let it grown any bigger cause my chest is so sore. Yesterday I swept 2 rooms in the house and them took a 4 hour nap! Hoping I get my energy back soon. Our house is on the market and we blocked it from showings right now but it's back on Saturday and we have an open house Sunday so I need to be at least a bit of a help! Thankfully my mom is staying with us through next week. My little guys are ready to have their Mama back!


For the kind of surgery you had to have, you sound marvelous!! Really!! Don't over do things now. You "do" want to heal properly!!!


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## Nowensmama

Thanks for th encouragement. Everyone seemed to bounce back so quickly who posted so was feeling a bit discouraged. Just sitting up at my computer wipes me out. I went for a walk outside today. Wore me out and made me feel sore but also made me feel a bit more like myself which was nice. My chest is sore today. Ready for that to go away.


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## Andros

Nowensmama said:


> Thanks for th encouragement. Everyone seemed to bounce back so quickly who posted so was feeling a bit discouraged. Just sitting up at my computer wipes me out. I went for a walk outside today. Wore me out and made me feel sore but also made me feel a bit more like myself which was nice. My chest is sore today. Ready for that to go away.


Your surgery was exstensive. Don't push yourself.


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## joplin1975

If the goiter was under your sternum, you had a pretty extensive surgery. Add in the hormones going haywire and, well, I'd say you are right where you need to be!


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## brookshire

Nowensmama said:


> Yesterday I swept 2 rooms in the house and them took a 4 hour nap! Hoping I get my energy back soon.


You and me both and my surgery was 3 weeks before yours. I'm getting really impatient with this.

But I guess we both should just let nature take its course and let ourselves get well. I'm back at work but I'm not pushing it. When I go home I drop.

You'll have plenty of time to work on your house and take care of your kids. It's good for them to learn that Mommy's human too. It's hard having the house on the market but try not to do too much and when you must clean or something do just what you did afterwards--take a nap.

Some people go build houses and host Thanksgiving dinner right after their surgeries. You and I, on the other hand, are resting after our surgeries and that's all there is to it.


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## Nowensmama

I have my post op tomorrow. Not sure if they'll check my thyroid levels but know at see point they will be. I've always just trusted my endo, but really want to get a handle on it. What tests should I be having and what levels and I looking for? Thanks for any help!


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## StormFinch

Do make sure you have your D and Ferritin checked. Granted, after the more extensive procedure it's normal to be more tired than someone that just did an in and out, but my D and Ferritin were both low after my surgery. After I got them back on track I was a lot less worn out feeling.


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## Nowensmama

Thanks for the tip!


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## joplin1975

Nowensmama said:


> I have my post op tomorrow. Not sure if they'll check my thyroid levels but know at see point they will be. I've always just trusted my endo, but really want to get a handle on it. What tests should I be having and what levels and I looking for? Thanks for any help!


My insurance got really wacky on me about blood tests (which, for a while, I was having monthly)...in order to save $$, what we did was test TSH and free t4 at the beginning, and then added free t3 and carefully monitored symptoms when "fine tuning."


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## jsgarden1

Did you get to your post-op yet Nowensmama? Wondering how you made out. My heart goes out to you, that was a big surgery!


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## Nowensmama

Post-op went well. Pathology report was clear! Just a massive goiter. So glad it's gone! Steri-strips were removed and I'm amazed at how good it looks already! The resident that cleaned me off guessed who the surgeon was who closed me by looking at my incision. He said he's great and is going into plastics (My surgery was at a teaching hospital and residents close). All restrictions are lifted this coming Friday. He said my parathyroid levels looked great so I could discontinue calcium (other than regular stuff I was already taking). My calcium levels were back to normal by the time I was discharged but they put me on "maintenance" calcium so I was taking 1250 mg 3 times a day! SO glad to be done with those mega horse pills! He wants to see me in 4 weeks.. and recheck thyroid levels in 7. So guessing all is good! Now that I'm off painkillers I seem to have a lot more energy. Hoping it stays that way and hoping I get lucky and the starter dose of synthroid is where I should be! Thanks again everyone so much! Plan to hang around here to encourage others, and also discuss levels when I know what mine are.. just won't be here as much as I get back into the swing of being Mama full time again =)


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## jsgarden1

You "sound" so much better Beth! Still take it easy though, don't want you overdoing it just yet  I'm so glad for you that your pathology caame back clear. What a relief!! I'm waiting on my report for Tuesday. Wishing you the very best!!


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