# Graves' Diagnosis



## Chase

Hi, I'm new to the boards. This is my first post, as a matter of fact. I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism - Graves' on November 22. I have already elected to have it surgically removed because of the pressure in my neck. The option of meds and RAI wouldn't shrink it, so I figured it was the best move. My doctor wholly agrees.

I know a lot of people feel devastated by getting diagnosed with Graves', but I think I'm in the minority. I felt so crappy for so long that I literally thought I was dying. Yep, I had and still have all the same downfalls as everyone - loss of attention span, fatigue but no sleep, weight loss (go thyroid! go thyroid!), pounding heart. So, when I was finally diagnosed, a feeling of relief rushed through me because there was a reason for everything. I thought I had just been steadily growing more stupid by the day in my work life. 

Here is what I have learned so far in these few short weeks:

a) I'm okay with removing what doesn't work so long as it allows me to swallow food and lay on my back without suffocating.

b) My endocrinologist knows what he's talking about and wastes no time in moving things right along.

c) After a thorough and ultimately unnecessary but well-meaning cardiac test, it is estimated that my heart will give out finally when I'm 105.

d) I finally know what it is like, after almost two years, to have a heart rate below 104. (Feels pretty danged sweet!)

e) It was not all in my head. I swear this was the worst feeling of all because other tests were coming back negative.

f) I will have a cool scar for next Halloween. :evilgrin0025:

g) Such a little butterfly-shaped thingy can really screw you up, both physically and mentally.

h) The internet can be a wonderful thing, but it can also be a dangerous thing when you read some experiences with this lovely ailment. You just have to remember that's not necessarily what YOU will experience.

i) You can make nieces and nephews feel sorry for you because of the great name of this disease. You never have to go get your own drink or the remote. arty0036:

j) Hyperthyroidism isn't all bad. It's a great way to lose weight, and Mother Nature's stay? Two days, tops. Like I said, not everything is bad.

k) Best of all, I'm not dying and there is a solution to my problem.

I have to keep my head up by decision. I am going through this pretty much alone. This decision has helped more than you can know - to just decide to meet things head-on and deal with them. It's nice to have family and friends who are there when you have an appointment or surgery, but you're the only one who can and has to deal with the day-to-day grind of things when your brain just doesn't feel like doing anything at all. That was the first lesson I accepted once I was diagnosed.

Surgery looms in the January / February time frame. I just started Tapazole (Methimizole) to shut that little sucker down. Then bloodwork on the 6th of January and back to the doc on the 13.

For me, this can't happen soon enough. It has interfered with school (went back two years ago and am approaching my final semester) and work (paperwork? what's that?), and I'm getting a bit sick and tired of having to learn new coping strategies. So, I'm looking at this as a way of getting back to the me that used to do 20 things at once without breaking a sweat. Sweating seems to be what I do best now!

Anyway, that's my take on it. A little more to go, and I get my feet back under me.

CHASE


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## lavender

Welcome to the boards! I commend your decision and your attitude. I too knew I wanted the sucker out the moment I was diagnosed. Took a bit longer to convince my doc, but I had it out, and I think that was the best decision I could make. You will have to learn to manage hypoT on the flip side, but it sounds like you have a good attitude to get you there!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Hi, I'm new to the boards. This is my first post, as a matter of fact. I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism - Graves' on November 22. I have already elected to have it surgically removed because of the pressure in my neck. The option of meds and RAI wouldn't shrink it, so I figured it was the best move. My doctor wholly agrees.
> 
> I know a lot of people feel devastated by getting diagnosed with Graves', but I think I'm in the minority. I felt so crappy for so long that I literally thought I was dying. Yep, I had and still have all the same downfalls as everyone - loss of attention span, fatigue but no sleep, weight loss (go thyroid! go thyroid!), pounding heart. So, when I was finally diagnosed, a feeling of relief rushed through me because there was a reason for everything. I thought I had just been steadily growing more stupid by the day in my work life.
> 
> Here is what I have learned so far in these few short weeks:
> 
> a) I'm okay with removing what doesn't work so long as it allows me to swallow food and lay on my back without suffocating.
> 
> b) My endocrinologist knows what he's talking about and wastes no time in moving things right along.
> 
> c) After a thorough and ultimately unnecessary but well-meaning cardiac test, it is estimated that my heart will give out finally when I'm 105.
> 
> d) I finally know what it is like, after almost two years, to have a heart rate below 104. (Feels pretty danged sweet!)
> 
> e) It was not all in my head. I swear this was the worst feeling of all because other tests were coming back negative.
> 
> f) I will have a cool scar for next Halloween. :evilgrin0025:
> 
> g) Such a little butterfly-shaped thingy can really screw you up, both physically and mentally.
> 
> h) The internet can be a wonderful thing, but it can also be a dangerous thing when you read some experiences with this lovely ailment. You just have to remember that's not necessarily what YOU will experience.
> 
> i) You can make nieces and nephews feel sorry for you because of the great name of this disease. You never have to go get your own drink or the remote. arty0036:
> 
> j) Hyperthyroidism isn't all bad. It's a great way to lose weight, and Mother Nature's stay? Two days, tops. Like I said, not everything is bad.
> 
> k) Best of all, I'm not dying and there is a solution to my problem.
> 
> I have to keep my head up by decision. I am going through this pretty much alone. This decision has helped more than you can know - to just decide to meet things head-on and deal with them. It's nice to have family and friends who are there when you have an appointment or surgery, but you're the only one who can and has to deal with the day-to-day grind of things when your brain just doesn't feel like doing anything at all. That was the first lesson I accepted once I was diagnosed.
> 
> Surgery looms in the January / February time frame. I just started Tapazole (Methimizole) to shut that little sucker down. Then bloodwork on the 6th of January and back to the doc on the 13.
> 
> For me, this can't happen soon enough. It has interfered with school (went back two years ago and am approaching my final semester) and work (paperwork? what's that?), and I'm getting a bit sick and tired of having to learn new coping strategies. So, I'm looking at this as a way of getting back to the me that used to do 20 things at once without breaking a sweat. Sweating seems to be what I do best now!
> 
> Anyway, that's my take on it. A little more to go, and I get my feet back under me.
> 
> CHASE


Chase; welcome. What a breath of fresh air you are. If I could to it over again, I would have gone straight on to surgery myself!! Nothing else really works although so many try awfully hard.

In the end scheme, the thyroid must go.

Thank you for sharing your story and imparting your humor!!

You will get back to normal and as a matter of fact you will do better than that. Many of us who share your positive attitude and thinking have gone on to clean up the ol' life-style and really really do something with our lives.

Glad you are on the antithyroid to control the possibility of thyrotoxicosis (dumping) and please do let us know when surgery is scheduled.


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## desrtbloom

Hi Chase:

Awesome attitude!!! So glad you finally have answers. I know for me my diagnosis has explained sooooo many things I have been going through for years and just never realized exactly what the heck was wrong with me. You'll do great with the surgery.

Best Regards,
Patti


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## Chase

Hey, everyone!

Thanks for the encouragement! It's nice to be able to chat with folks who have gone through it. Like I told the docs, I could deal with all of this if I could just get the pressure in my neck and my heartrate down. 1 outta 2 ain't bad at this point!

I look forward to keeping track of my progress on here.

Question - does having a thyroidectomy and going on replacement hormone prohibit you from giving blood once all the hoopla has died down?

Just curious.

Thanks!

CHASE


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Hey, everyone!
> 
> Thanks for the encouragement! It's nice to be able to chat with folks who have gone through it. Like I told the docs, I could deal with all of this if I could just get the pressure in my neck and my heartrate down. 1 outta 2 ain't bad at this point!
> 
> I look forward to keeping track of my progress on here.
> 
> Question - does having a thyroidectomy and going on replacement hormone prohibit you from giving blood once all the hoopla has died down?
> 
> Just curious.
> 
> Thanks!
> 
> CHASE


To my knowledge, it does not prevent you from donating blood.

We are looking forward to tracking your progress and if there is any way we can help, we will be glad to do so!


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## Chase

Also, have any of you suffered years' worth of nosebleeds? I can't figure out where they're from, and they've been going on so long that I'm "chronically anemic", as they say. I always wonder if it's because of the high systolic blood pressure level. My bottom numbers are happy as can be. It's the top number that has a rocket up its digits.

Any ideas on that?


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## Gisella

Hi Chase, I too was releaved when first diagnosed with GD as it explained why i was feeling the way i was. My endo was quite hopeful that i would go into remission after 18months but unfortunately not to be. As a result i was a bit down about my next treatment options but after reading your post it has woken me up again and i should just accept what is and get on with it. Thanks hope all goes well for you.


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## GD Women

Chase,

"Question - does having a thyroidectomy and going on replacement hormone prohibit you from giving blood once all the hoopla has died down?"

As long as your levels and medication are stable normally for a year, there should be no problems.

"nosebleeds"

Are you on Armour? I have read others say that they got nose bleeds from Armour


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Also, have any of you suffered years' worth of nosebleeds? I can't figure out where they're from, and they've been going on so long that I'm "chronically anemic", as they say. I always wonder if it's because of the high systolic blood pressure level. My bottom numbers are happy as can be. It's the top number that has a rocket up its digits.
> 
> Any ideas on that?


Anemia is quite commen w/thyroid disease. Do any of these causes of nosebleed apply, do you think?

Nosebleed Causes
Most nosebleeds do not have an easily identifiable cause. However, trauma to the nose is a very common cause of nosebleeds. Nosebleeds can be caused by trauma to the outside of the nose from a blow to the face, or trauma to the inside of the nose from nose picking. Other conditions that predispose a person to nosebleeds include:

•exposure to warm, dry air for prolonged periods of time,

•nasal and sinus infections,

•allergic rhinitis,

•nasal foreign body (object stuck in the nose),

•vigorous nose blowing,

•nasal surgery,

•deviated or perforated nasal septum, and

•cocaine use.
Less commonly, an underlying disease process or taking certain medications may cause a nosebleed or make it more difficult to control.

•Inability of the blood to clot is most often due to blood-thinning medications such as warfarin (Coumadin), clopidogrel bisulfate (Plavix), nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), or aspirin.

•Topical nasal medications, such as corticosteroids and antihistamines, may sometimes lead to nosebleeds.

•Liver disease, chronic alcohol abuse, kidney disease, platelet disorders, and inherited blood clotting disorders can also interfere with blood clotting and predispose to nosebleeds.

•Vascular malformations in the nose and nasal tumors are rare causes of nosebleeds.

•High blood pressure may contribute to bleeding, but is rarely the sole reason for a nosebleed. It is often the anxiety associated with the nosebleed that leads to the elevation in blood pressure. Please make note of this one.

http://www.emedicinehealth.com/nosebleeds/article_em.htm

Here is info on Ferritin. Have you had a Ferritin test? 
Ferritin http://www.thewayup.com/newsletters/081504.htm


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## Chase

Gisella,

From everything I have read (and that's a lot of stuff), I have learned that new treatments are always on the horizon. However, I do know what you mean about accepting things. I have no cartilage in my knees. Every moring, I have to make a decision about which foot I will put on the floor first in terms of the pain from laying in bed all night. Ultimately, I know I have to get out of bed and go to work or be a Scoutmaster or daughter or whatever else fits the bill. Sometimes, I think things - no matter what they are - are a matter of putting your head down and plowing ahead. For me, I see a solution on the horizon. The arthritis is a chronic ailment I have learned to cope with over the years.

For example, I went out to the Rocky Mountains with friends. They wanted to climb to the top of Long's Peak observatory. Could I? In one shot, hell no. But I could do it in thirds. It's a matter of pacing yourself sometimes, I think.

And yep, you do have to accept it, but only to some degree. If there's an option, it's up to you to pursue it. If one doesn't exist, then it's up to all of us to keep looking. Sometimes, there's an answer. Sometimes, there isn't. Sometimes, like you said, you have to accept things the way they are. But, once you do that, you can find really neat ways to get around what impedes you. Life doesn't stop, so you might as well enjoy it however you can. There are some really beautiful things to see out there. I promise.

Keep your chin up but your jaw low. 

CHASE


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## Gisella

Thanks for your response Chase. What i meant the other day was that i have to accept the fact that i have GD and stop feeling sorry for myself and try to do everything possible to get myself right again. In no way am i going to let this thing stop me from living life and making the most of it.Life is way too short to get absorbed in all the things that are going wrong and not concentrate and all that is right. I have always been a positive person and your initial post just reminded me of that.So thank you.


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## AngeInBoston

Hi Chase, welcome to the Board!

I love your attitude! Since I'm here on behalf of my 11 yr old daughter diagnosed in October, I've been very scared of the possibility of the surgery. However you have opened my eyes to the flipside, that it may be the best course of action....although they will probably tell me she's too young (??), but I will ask at the next appointment what the options for this are. She hasn't really started puberty yet (possibly because of the Graves), so I don't know how that plays into it.

I'm sick of all the changes that have been wrought to her young life over the past year or more since this must have come about without diagnosis....she dropped out of competitive rock climbing where she was nationally ranked, her school work has suffered greatly with the lack of concentration, her personality has changed with all the extreme Graves Rages we've had to suffer through, the anxiety she has is incredible, she is sure there is a ghost haunting our condo. I just recently started her on Prozac and Benadryl at bedtime to try to help the rages and sleeplessness.

Thanks to you, I now see that maybe I should jump over the years of battling with the Methimazole to get levels correct, and just go to getting the offending troublemaker OUT!

Good luck and keep us informed!
Ange


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## lavender

AngeInBoston said:


> Hi Chase, welcome to the Board!
> 
> I love your attitude! Since I'm here on behalf of my 11 yr old daughter diagnosed in October, I've been very scared of the possibility of the surgery. However you have opened my eyes to the flipside, that it may be the best course of action....although they will probably tell me she's too young (??), but I will ask at the next appointment what the options for this are. She hasn't really started puberty yet (possibly because of the Graves), so I don't know how that plays into it.
> 
> I'm sick of all the changes that have been wrought to her young life over the past year or more since this must have come about without diagnosis....she dropped out of competitive rock climbing where she was nationally ranked, her school work has suffered greatly with the lack of concentration, her personality has changed with all the extreme Graves Rages we've had to suffer through, the anxiety she has is incredible, she is sure there is a ghost haunting our condo. I just recently started her on Prozac and Benadryl at bedtime to try to help the rages and sleeplessness.
> 
> Thanks to you, I now see that maybe I should jump over the years of battling with the Methimazole to get levels correct, and just go to getting the offending troublemaker OUT!
> 
> Good luck and keep us informed!
> Ange


Hi Angie, 
Sounds like this has been really tough on you and your daughter. I know for myself, it is pretty hard for me to control my temper when my heart is beating out of control, and I knew I was mentally unstable before my surgery. If your daughter has only been on the methimazole since October, you may still have some time to evaluate if it is effective. I know for me, it took a few months to start to notice any changes from the methimazole. I was ultimately not satisfied with the meds and chose surgery myself. Heart palpitations and resulting anxiety and rages have improved greatly my since surgery.

I posted a link on Graves in Children below that goes through the different treatment options. It seems like surgery is possible, just not the preferred treatment. If you do opt for surgery, I would find the best surgeon available!

I am sending prayers for you and your daughter.

https://www.ngdf.org/pages/45


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## Chase

Angie,

One positive thing that is really apparent on this board is that people know what you're going through - not just from a caretaker's perspective but also from the patient's. Like Lavender said, we know and feel when our tempers are short. The lack of concentration is a real brickbuster when it comes to things that require it, such as work or school. One frustration seems to build on top of one another. And rounding out all of that is a general sensation of just not feeling good. Muscles are weak, hands shake - there are times when I can't write my name because of the shakes. So, bounce questions off folks around here. They've been through or are going through all this stuff, and there are workarounds to things you might not have considered that gets her through rough patches.

One of the most liberating things for me was finding people who had the same symptoms and debilitations from Graves'. While it's a very treatable disease, there are a lot of crappy symptoms that go with it that are like carrying a backpack full of lead everywhere you go until you get into the right treatment. Your daughter has a whole world and life ahead of her, but sometimes those symptoms can cloud her hope for it. She's angry, and I don't blame her. I wouldn't want to be stuck with how I feel now at that age.

Graves', for me, developed over a number of years until it manifested into something recognizable. I accept that it will take a bit of time to get the end of the tunnel as far as having it removed. That includes taking the methimizole to shut it down.

Your daughter's age really complicates it for you from a caretaker's perspective because you are ultimately in charge of the decisions. In my opinion, as a caretaker myself for two elderly parents, you need to get as much information as possible about your choices. Take a notepad of questions with you to the doctor. Ask him or her everything you want to know until you're sure you have an answer. Then, you can weigh all your choices. The treatments to this are slow-moving, no matter which you choose for her (and maybe she helps choose, herself). So, be patient with that as much as you can.

I know it's frustrating because no one on here is going to endorse one treatment over another. Removal is the right choice for me because of the size of my thyroid and all the gushy stuff it's screwing with in neck. Otherwise, I might have done RAI. The right treatment for your daughter may not be the same as mine or it could be right on target. Stay with this until you feel you have the right information, including pros and cons, to make a decision. You know your kid, and you'll know the one that starts to work. Methimizole, like Lavender said, can take a while to kick in and get things to a more acceptable level. The doc should be able to see that in blood work, too.

And as for the haunted condo, you never know. But I will say this - when you can't sleep and it's 3 in the morning, you hear all kinds of crazy stuff. Add in the anxiety of Graves', and it's like throwing gasoline on a fire.

Or you just have a haunted condo.


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## Chase

Angie,

One more thing I thought of - take a cruise through the internet to see how many celebrities have thyroid issues. There are an amazing number of Graves' or other thyroid issues out there who go on to live productive lives following treatment. Maybe look for someone she admires to help put it all into perspective?

Just a thought.

CHASE


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## lavender

Angie,
I want to re-iterate what Chase said. If possible, get your daughter's input on this. I know you are her caregiver and ultimately have to make the choice, but she will have to live with it for the rest of her life. Kids are really intuitive about these things and she may have a sense of what her body needs to heal.

One thing that came out while I was healing from surgery is that I had a hernia surgery when I was 9 that I never understood. I feel like I was finally able to process through the emotions at 32, but that was a long time to carry that around.

In contrast, I had tubes put in my ears when I was 7, and I never had a problem with it because it was obvious to me that I had been having ear infections for years that this surgery eliminated. I was really grateful for that surgery as I was for the thyroidectomy.

I know kids are small but they know and remember more than we realize.


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## Chase

Yep, I couldn't agree more, Lavender. Angie, maybe you have your daughter think through the options. I'll bet she has the abiliity to put things together and help decide what is best. Also, print out some information for her that identifies why she feels the way she does. I mentioned that before, that finally meeting people online who were going through the same thing helped immensely.

I have identified counterproductive things I do right now that I didn't even realize I was doing over the course of at least three years as a result of reading about Graves'. It helps me to understand it and combat it a little better than if I was blind to even knowing it was there. Maybe in the same way, it can help her understand why her life turned rather upside down recently? I'm sure there are some very good publications out there for kids to discuss Graves'. And also, maybe let her fire off some questions she has to the doc? I know I do when I go for a visit.

Just some more thoughts...

CHASE


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## Chase

Well, I have a good news update. I got my grades for this semester this morning. I cannot tell you how hard a time I had concentrating on school work this semester. It was almost impossible. I went from being a straight A student to worrying about just being able to pass a class. I was petrified about school the day of my diagnosis, because it all fell into place. I sweated how I was going to pass any of the final exams and finish the projects and papers that had to be done when I couldn't remember where I had put my car keys after getting home from a long day of work.

Lo and behold, I managed to pass everything with a C, C+, B, and B+. arty0009: These were core classes for my degree which required a C or above in order for them to count. Right now, I feel like they're all As. I fully expected to have to drop out of school for a while until everything got under control because I had such a hard time recalling facts for a test. I would study for hours but couldn't recall solid answers when test time came. I stayed, though, on the advice of a good friend, who said, "You have to stick it out, girl. It's tough, but you CAN do it."

Everyone should have a friend who will say that when you need to hear it.

So, it paid off. Now, just one more semester to go before I graduate at the ripe old age of 38. I'm anticipating the surgery taking place during this last semester, and I've already talked to my professors to let them know what is going on and what kind of absences they can expect from me. I'm determined to continue sticking things out until I have that degree in my hand. I've worked too damned hard to give up now.


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## Chase

Oh, and one more good update - I know I haven't been on methimazole that long (I hear people saying it could take months), but the shakes in my hands have already diminished, it seems. My resting heart rate has dropped into the low 80s, too, for a good part of the work day (it starts to go up in the afternoon). My attention span is still worthless, but I'm okay with that.

I feel like it's definitely a step in the right direction to speeding along getting rid of my thyroid! hugs4


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I have a good news update. I got my grades for this semester this morning. I cannot tell you how hard a time I had concentrating on school work this semester. It was almost impossible. I went from being a straight A student to worrying about just being able to pass a class. I was petrified about school the day of my diagnosis, because it all fell into place. I sweated how I was going to pass any of the final exams and finish the projects and papers that had to be done when I couldn't remember where I had put my car keys after getting home from a long day of work.
> 
> Lo and behold, I managed to pass everything with a C, C+, B, and B+. arty0009: These were core classes for my degree which required a C or above in order for them to count. Right now, I feel like they're all As. I fully expected to have to drop out of school for a while until everything got under control because I had such a hard time recalling facts for a test. I would study for hours but couldn't recall solid answers when test time came. I stayed, though, on the advice of a good friend, who said, "You have to stick it out, girl. It's tough, but you CAN do it."
> 
> Everyone should have a friend who will say that when you need to hear it.
> 
> So, it paid off. Now, just one more semester to go before I graduate at the ripe old age of 38. I'm anticipating the surgery taking place during this last semester, and I've already talked to my professors to let them know what is going on and what kind of absences they can expect from me. I'm determined to continue sticking things out until I have that degree in my hand. I've worked too damned hard to give up now.


Oh, boy..................if that is not the best news!!! Somehow you "managed!" We all know and understand brain fog. I can assure you of that!!!

Clearly you are very bright and if not for the fact that you usually are a 4.0 student, you would not have done so well. I applaud you for your detemination.


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## Chase

Thanks, Andros! I'm pretty much on cloud nine today!arty0030:


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## Gisella

Fantastic news Chase, well done! It is so important in life to have that someone who is there to motivate you to achieve what you want in life. Good luck with everything. Gisella


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Thanks, Andros! I'm pretty much on cloud nine today!arty0030:


As well you should be!!! I wish you "Forever Cloud 9's!"


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## lavender

Chase said:


> Well, I have a good news update. I got my grades for this semester this morning. I cannot tell you how hard a time I had concentrating on school work this semester. It was almost impossible. I went from being a straight A student to worrying about just being able to pass a class. I was petrified about school the day of my diagnosis, because it all fell into place. I sweated how I was going to pass any of the final exams and finish the projects and papers that had to be done when I couldn't remember where I had put my car keys after getting home from a long day of work.
> 
> Lo and behold, I managed to pass everything with a C, C+, B, and B+. arty0009: These were core classes for my degree which required a C or above in order for them to count. Right now, I feel like they're all As. I fully expected to have to drop out of school for a while until everything got under control because I had such a hard time recalling facts for a test. I would study for hours but couldn't recall solid answers when test time came. I stayed, though, on the advice of a good friend, who said, "You have to stick it out, girl. It's tough, but you CAN do it."
> 
> Everyone should have a friend who will say that when you need to hear it.
> 
> So, it paid off. Now, just one more semester to go before I graduate at the ripe old age of 38. I'm anticipating the surgery taking place during this last semester, and I've already talked to my professors to let them know what is going on and what kind of absences they can expect from me. I'm determined to continue sticking things out until I have that degree in my hand. I've worked too damned hard to give up now.


Good for you! And so glad to hear the shakes are gone!

I started Grad school this fall a month after my thyroidectomy. It has been hard, and I decided to go part time (which the school supported when I looked like I was about to pass out one day). I am still having trouble with forgetfulness, don't remember what I read minutes after reading it, can't stay awake in class some days. But, the good news is that I seem to be doing well regardless. A in one class, still waiting on the grade for the other, but I had an A- before the final, and I think I did pretty well on it.

I know this will take a bit longer with the slow start, and I am coming to accept that it's not how long it takes me to get there, but that I get there at all. I waited 10 years to return to do this, and I am just glad I made it this far!


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## AngeInBoston

Congratulations Chase! Thank you for the advice about my daughter, she's been having SUCH a hard time with this disease lately! She missed two months of school, and now we've been trying to integrate her back into school, although it's a horrible tantrum every morning because she feels SO lousy at 5:30am with the headaches, stomach aches, lethargy, and school phobia and anxiety that she absolutely does NOT want to go! She says she can't concentrate in any class, and no one is understanding or supporting her at all, I think the school is not believing it so much anymore. I'm glad to hear you powered through, and I'll try talking to her about it and researching like you suggested.

~Ange


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## Chase

Wonderful job, Lavender! I'm taking a year off before I even consider grad school. Heck, I can't even pick out what degree it will be, so I am cutting myself some slack until I get that settled. But I think it's safe to say we're both just plowing right ahead, no matter what our thyroids (or lack of them) do to get in the way!

Angie, it's very hard to describe the anxiety that goes with this. You get anxiety going to the grocery store, the bank, school, work, and pretty much any time there is an instance that may require you to remember, interact, decide, or negotiate in some form or another. Since that is just about all the time unless you're entering solitary confinement, you can consider it a constant thing with her.

If Graves' wasn't in the equation, they'd be calling it ADD or whatever letters they're using for it these days. She may not be entirely wrong that no one is supporting her because they truly may not understand. As an adult, it's easy for me to decide that I'm going to stick through things, whether or not I accomplish that intention. For an 11-year-old, not so easy.

Has anyone given her teachers a fact sheet on Graves'? It might help. Also, she is going to have to come up with some coping mechanisms, either on her own or with the help of a qualified person.

For example, I had a ton of term papers to do, but my concentration made the odds of me getting them done in one shot worse than getting struck by lightning in a submarine. So, I compromised. I'd work on one until it got tuned out. Then, I'd turn to the other and work on that until the same happened. Take a break. Start over. It wasn't the fastest set of papers I've ever written, but it got the job done. When I take time to reflect on it, I am amazed at how much my life has changed with the things I have to do to accomplish tasks that were a breeze a few years ago.

Tomorrow (Friday) will a very trying day, as I have fallen behind at work. I have to explain to my boss things I can't account for because I can remember intimate details of the projects like I could two years ago. I have to produce an excuse as to why I am so far behind on what should have already been done. I honestly don't know what I'm going to say, because you have to be careful of what excuses you hang your hat on in my industry. No one wants a physiomental gimp on their team when the chips are down in an audit.

I have no idea how it will go tomorrow, except I know there will be chastisement from a boss who is a good guy but naturally needs results in our work. To explain that my memory is shot won't cut it, and it could really damage my career. So, I'll say a prayer or two when I'm getting ready for work tomorrow morning and see how it goes. That's the best I can do until or if I have to pull the trigger that my memory loss is a permanent deal. I'm not borrowing that trouble just yet.

Damn, but I need a permanent vacation some weeks.


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## Chase

And for illustration purposes, this is what a post looks like when a Graves' patient can't sleep at 2:30 in the morning and has to be up in 3 hours....


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## rockabette

Hi Chase

Congrats on your grades. It looks mighty likely that I have graves too. I actually quit my well paid govt job as I could no longer function in the role even though I had been doing it for years. I only happened to get my thyroid tested when my dr ordered full blood tests as i had complained of a racing heart and suffering severe anxiety at my work and to get drs certificates for my sick days (I was struggling to get out of bed due to the anxiety of the thought of going to work).

Funny thing is I quit my job before i knew that there was a problem with the bloods. I am now working at a rural pub for less hours and money but more running around on my feet. I am commencing fulltime study in residential drafting in 2011. Coincidentally I chose an occupation where I can ultimately work from home for myself which will totally suit a graves person.

Anyhow you have inspired me to pursue my studies and I hope that I can stick to it and overcome all the hurdles with confidence.


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## Chase

Good for you, Rock! I envy your resolve to make that move! Sometimes, I think, "Wouldn't it be great to be a forest ranger?" or something like that. I'm not even kidding about that statement, either. But I like my paycheck, so I chug along in my current career.

This has been a particularly tough week for me. I'm barely keeping my head above water. I am pretty sure it is due to the trainwreck going on inside of me as the methimazole does its thing. My brain doesn't know whether it's coming or going this week. The meeting I am dreading got moved to 3:00 today, so that will give me some breathing room to prepare myself. (Put a rosary in my pocket, just in case my preparation isn't so good.)

I had to take vacation days before the end of the year, so I have given myself a three-day weekend to recharge my batteries. I'll see if that helps. It will give me some more time to take care of the stuff I need to do following my father's passing on November 14. (Now that I look back, I didn't mention that in these posts.) I have had my hands full with that, and I think the grieving is just getting started over losing him. The house we shared after my mom died four years ago is very empty and quiet without him. But something good comes of everything, because I know he would have worried about me so much had he known the diagnosis. Sometimes, things happen in a certain way for a certain reason, I think.

Suffice to say ringing in the New Year will be kissing one hell of a one goodbye and embarking on a quest to get this thyroid out.


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## lavender

Chase, I took 10 years between my undergrad and grad school, so give yourself some time. For me, it was important to know that I really liked what I was doing enough to spend more time and money at school. As I have worked through some of my own health issues, it has been important to know I am going into a career I can sustain despite my limitations.

The passing of your father in addition to completing school and Graves is certainly enough to make your memory go to pieces. Give your self some time to grieve and recover and I think much of it will come back. In the meantime, you could try writing things down. I know I had to keep a detailed calendar/schedule at my job while I was still working and I had little note pads everywhere to help myself keep track of what I had done, what needed to be done. Then, I would think I had never done something and open a client's chart to find it was all right where it needed to be! People were always surprised at how thorough I was when I was just attempting to make up for my own memory deficits!

Now, when my Graves was at its worst, I went into thyroid storm and had to be hospitalized, I took time off work and received disability pay because I was not capable of doing my job at all. Breaks and rest are important and I think very hard to recognize we need when our Graves has us going at 1,000 miles an hour. For me, I find that if I don't rest along the way, I eventually crash, which is even worse. After my surgery, I decided to go back to school as planned instead of returning to my job. It just all seemed to work out the way it was supposed to.

I also found that counseling has been essential through my illness. Having someone to help me deal with stress and accept my own limitations has been priceless. There are EAP providers to help people deal with employment issues.

Angie, I was thinking of your daughter and there are counselors who work with children. One might be able to help your daughter talk about what she feels like, help her with some coping strategies, help you learn to manage her behaviors, and help advocate with her teachers. You may have already been down that road if your daughter has been put on medication. It was just a thought.


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## Chase

I had to laugh when I read your post, Lavender! I looked around my cube, and I saw virtually every avaiable surface covered with Post-It notes. I NEVER used to use those, and in these last few weeks, I have started writing down EVERYTHING. I have the opposite problem you do - I think I've done something and I really haven't. It's like the intention to do it becomes the memory and the execution of the task go off to la la land, never actually occurring. I'm in a job I have worked my buns off to get, and now I really think I'm in danger of losing it. My productivity is worthless sometimes, I find myself staring for an indeterminate amount of time, and time flies so fast before I can complete one task. And God help anyone who interrupts that task and ruins my limited concentration! :anim_08:

Years ago, my mom had a severe stroke from which she almost fully recovered except her short-term memory was very bad. It's ironic that I now know what she felt like, and I regret not having all the patience in the world with her about it.

On the other hand, I live alone since my father passed, and that's probably a good thing when Evil Chase surfaces (you know the exact moment when your inner tyrannasaurus rex raises its ugly head!)  I don't have to explain why I am ticked that can't remember where I put my contacts case, the contents of which are absolutely required for me to see lest I read the ground like a Braille book when walking. The only person frustrated is me and my t-rex self, which is probably where Angie is not so lucky. Moms get the brunt of a child's frustrations because love of a mom is pretty much unconditional, as it should be.

I'm not saying moms don't get so frustrated they need a shot and a beer every now and then (hell, I need one and I'm just dealing with ME), but they're usually pretty slick at negotiating mine fields like this. So, hang in there, Angie. The very fact that you're hitting up these boards for advice is a sign that you're a good mom dealing with a very difficult situation. It sounds like you're doing a great job so far and that you'll see it through to the finish, whatever that ends up being. While daughter may not realize it, she's the luckiest kid in the world right now because you care about her.

I have to go. T-rex is getting hungry, and it would be a shame to have to take it out on myself when I have family waiting in the wings to yell at.


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## lavender

I had to laugh! My former boss gave me lost it notes for Christmas one year!

I worked as a case manager for the severely mentally ill and sometimes I could not figure out why my clients could not keep a simple appointment and were afraid to get jobs. Graves was my chance to see what it was like to really lose your mind and not have any control about it.

You may check to see what EAP services your company has. Chances are, if they have hired you and put time and money into your training, they will not want to loose you for something that will get better with treatment.

Customer service people have gotten the brunt of my T-rex on more than one occasion this past year! God bless them. Recently, it's been the phone company. After at least 10 calls, with a minimum of 5 transfers each, 2 repair men, and 3 weeks later, I still do not have working land line! I have learned to just not hang up the phone and get them to keep transferring me until I have calmed down enough to have a reasonable conversation with someone!


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## Chase

Funny you should mention EAP. (For those of you who don't know, EAP stands for Employee Assistance Program. EAPs deal with all kinds of health-related things, including behavioral services for people in crisis. Many companies provide this free of charge to their employees.) I had already called our provider this morning to set up a counseling session. And before anyone says this is contrary to my original post about putting my head down and plowing ahead, I say it's still plowing ahead. Like using Post-it notes, it is a means to coping with everything going on in both my body and brain, no matter how screwed up that is sometimes. If I sprain my ankle, I put a bandage on it. If I have a headache, I take Motrin. Those are options available to me to help in healing and pain relief. I know when to employ those measures because physical pain tells me so. Likewise, emotional pain and frustration are obviously part of the baggage of Graves', and I know when those emotions run outside of my normal coping abilities. When that happens, it's time to bandage them and fix what's wrong. Just like getting my thyroid removed before it gets so bad I can't get out of bed in the morning, I am going to take care of the emotional part of this, too. I can heal the physical stuff all day long and still be in a hole if I am not mentally fixed, too.

So, I made an appointment for a counseling session just to see where things stand in a very pivotal time in my life. From my experience, it's easier for a third party twice removed to tell you where you pitfalls in life are than to try to identify all of them yourself sometimes. I have read about the physical stuff. Now it's time to lasso the emotional stuff and see if that helps the anxiety that is really screwing around with my job these days. I'll still haul myself out of bed each day, fully intending I will never give in to the urge to not do so. And I'll just keep plowing ahead.


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## lavender

Good for you! Getting help is not a sign that we are weak! It would be much more irresponsible to go back to work without bandaging the wound and just bleeding all over the place (emotionally, so to speak)!


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## Chase

It turns out with EAP that you get about six sessions with an approved psychologist or clinician in your area. I highly recommend checking your workplace to see if it's available to you. It's free of charge for the initial sessions. Then, they get charged to your insurance thereafter. Check it out. No sense in letting good resources go to waste!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> It turns out with EAP that you get about six sessions with an approved psychologist or clinician in your area. I highly recommend checking your workplace to see if it's available to you. It's free of charge for the initial sessions. Then, they get charged to your insurance thereafter. Check it out. No sense in letting good resources go to waste!


I personally sought the counseling of a psychologist for 2 years in the aftermath of the damage Graves' did to my psyche. Best money I ever spent.

I prefer to think that the intelligent person recognizes the need and "acts" on it.

Good for you!!!


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## AngeInBoston

Thank you all for your support...in a weird way I'm relieved to see all of the validation of the emotional issues...her own Endo said her other Graves kids don't have the problems my daughter seems to have. Her school seems to have lost patience with her calling in sick, or acting so sick on the days she does go to school...they think it's all school-phobia. They have initiated a Pre-CHINS (Child in Need of Services--usually for Truant dropouts and drug addicts!) meeting for Wednesday, where I have to go, with her, the Pricipal, Nurse, Guidance Counselor, Social Worker who is on our side, and the Court Officer for this area! My daughter is terrified. I'm mad. I'm going to print out info on Graves disease as you suggested and fight for her. She may have alot of anxiety about going back to school, but I also believe she really does feel awful and is not just scamming me to stay out of school.

Chase, I hope things went well at your job?


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## Andros

AngeInBoston said:


> Thank you all for your support...in a weird way I'm relieved to see all of the validation of the emotional issues...her own Endo said her other Graves kids don't have the problems my daughter seems to have. Her school seems to have lost patience with her calling in sick, or acting so sick on the days she does go to school...they think it's all school-phobia. They have initiated a Pre-CHINS (Child in Need of Services--usually for Truant dropouts and drug addicts!) meeting for Wednesday, where I have to go, with her, the Pricipal, Nurse, Guidance Counselor, Social Worker who is on our side, and the Court Officer for this area! My daughter is terrified. I'm mad. I'm going to print out info on Graves disease as you suggested and fight for her. She may have alot of anxiety about going back to school, but I also believe she really does feel awful and is not just scamming me to stay out of school.
> 
> Chase, I hope things went well at your job?


Perhaps this will be of interest?

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1324966/

http://www.ngdf.org/cms/modules/files/uploads/7699.PDF


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## Debbie from Milwaukee

Ange:
Here are 3 options for your daughter's schooling that you should ask about at this meeting on Wednesday:
1) A "Section 504" Plan. This is a plan of educational accommodations for your daughter that is written by the school staff and parent so that the child can be educated despite the medical condition. 
2) A school provided tutor. I think to qualify for this the child needs to be absent with a doctor's excuse for either 3 weeks straight or else the doctor sends a note that the child may not be able to reliably attend school in a normal fashion.
3) An IEP (individual educational plan) written IF your daughter would qualify for special education needs under the category of "Other Health Impaired." This is a last ditch plan, and your daughter may only qualify if she is seriously failing 1 or more subjects.

I would STRONGLY recommend that your run these 3 possible plans by the social worker if you can get hold of her before Wednesday. Also consider communicating that you would appreciate the social worker doing what she can to make this a cooperative rather than a confrontrational meeting, but you and your daughter are upset and defensive because of the school's response to her absences and feeling ill while in the classroom. Keep in mind that it is is possible that the school is required to hold a meeting like this after so many absences...BUT they can go a long way toward making this a productive meeting by becoming more understanding of your daughter's condition.

Also ask the social worker if your daughter needs to be there for the entire meeting or if perhaps she could just meet with perhaps the social worker, you, and one main teacher. This is an extremely intimidating setup for a young person who is functioning well, let alone for someone who is suffering both physically and emotionally. There may even be some sort of advocate available who could back you up on this. Besides, pushing her to attend this meeting could do great future harm to your daughter's trust of these school staff and her willingness to attend school even when she is feeling better.

The best special education meeting I ever attended in my 15 years as a school counselor involved a woman who was both a teacher herself as well as the mother of an autistic boy. She spoke in "school-ese" lingo but presented a highly informational as well as emotional picture of her son's disabling condition. If you are able to present contrasting info. from when your daughter was well (the past 2-3 years of report cards, extracurricular activities, etc.) as well as current medical info from your daughter's doctor's office (which perhaps the doctor's assistant could help you with), you will go a long way in convincing these people. YOU will the be the expert in the room on Wednesday on your daughter's past and current functioning.

Sorry this has gotten so long, but I feel pretty strongly on these issues. Hope some of this helps!


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## Chase

So, here's how the meeting went: it did not occur on the day it was scheduled to occur because my boss made the appointment during one of my prescheduled meetings. Normally, this would tick me off to no end, but it was a real blessing.

So, we moved it to the next week, which was this past Tuesday. (I managed to snag an extra day off on Monday because of unused vacation. Yay for me!).

Off to the meeting we go. I managed to weather it pretty well. I had been hauling buns the previous week to get things in some semblence of order before I had to explain why my work life is a total mess. This helped me to get some stuff sent out that needed to go but hadn't because I got piled with three other projects simultaneously. Not to mention that I still part-time in my old department watching the transmission grid once a week because they never hired anyone to replace me when I left, thus causing me to lost one week of productivity a month. Joy.

Anyway, I got through it relatively unscathed by making a few choice moves to place the onus on the people who needed to get their stuff done. It involved an afternoon of emails and phone calls, but I did it.

And on another interesting note, I didn't feel like I was dying for the first time in I can't remember how long while walking into work this morning. Usually, I'm almost gasping for breath by the time I reach the elevator. This morning, though, my heart was calm. Elevated, yes, but only because I was walking a decent distance. I don't know if this is some kind of turning point with the methimazole. It could be completely opposite tomorrow, but for that briefest of moments, I felt human again. My pulse has been sitting at around 80 all day, and I feel like I have been able to concentrate since the moment I sat down at my desk this morning. I'm not calling it a breakthrough - just calling it a break from what I've been feeling like for so long. I'm hoping it means my levels will be down far enough when I go to the blood work so that the doc okays the surgery soon. We'll see. Worst case is that I keep treading water like I am now, right? Oh, and the shakes have stayed gone. Can't complain about that!

So, thanks for the thoughts about that meeting. I was sweating it for days, and I came through all right. If I hadn't, I figure I would have just adjusted to a new way of coping with it. I'm doing that a lot lately, and it's starting to help. (I'm starting to buy stock in 3M for Post-Its.)


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## mum2bradley

Good to hear, I had almost 2 months off work before I returned Part-time mid October, I am up to about 6 hours a day now. Do you work for an electrical utility?


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## Chase

Yep, I do. Fortunately, this has not incapacitated me to work there to that extent. It's not the fast-moving stuff that gets to me - it's the slow-moving, attention-span-requiring tasks that get to me (read as paperwork). So far, I have been able to keep myself afloat and work to at least a satisfactory degree. But it's just not easy some days.


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## mum2bradley

I do too!! I am in Ontario and working on administrating the generation projects. I was totally on my butt for the first 5 weeks it took to get me diagnosed. Then about 3 to start back part time.
I will be going for RAI in February.


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## Chase

Yep, those generation projects can be killer, especially when it starts bordering with competitive companies around yours! I'm always impressed that places like MISO and PJM down here can keep track of all the hamsters on the wheel!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> So, here's how the meeting went: it did not occur on the day it was scheduled to occur because my boss made the appointment during one of my prescheduled meetings. Normally, this would tick me off to no end, but it was a real blessing.
> 
> So, we moved it to the next week, which was this past Tuesday. (I managed to snag an extra day off on Monday because of unused vacation. Yay for me!).
> 
> Off to the meeting we go. I managed to weather it pretty well. I had been hauling buns the previous week to get things in some semblence of order before I had to explain why my work life is a total mess. This helped me to get some stuff sent out that needed to go but hadn't because I got piled with three other projects simultaneously. Not to mention that I still part-time in my old department watching the transmission grid once a week because they never hired anyone to replace me when I left, thus causing me to lost one week of productivity a month. Joy.
> 
> Anyway, I got through it relatively unscathed by making a few choice moves to place the onus on the people who needed to get their stuff done. It involved an afternoon of emails and phone calls, but I did it.
> 
> And on another interesting note, I didn't feel like I was dying for the first time in I can't remember how long while walking into work this morning. Usually, I'm almost gasping for breath by the time I reach the elevator. This morning, though, my heart was calm. Elevated, yes, but only because I was walking a decent distance. I don't know if this is some kind of turning point with the methimazole. It could be completely opposite tomorrow, but for that briefest of moments, I felt human again. My pulse has been sitting at around 80 all day, and I feel like I have been able to concentrate since the moment I sat down at my desk this morning. I'm not calling it a breakthrough - just calling it a break from what I've been feeling like for so long. I'm hoping it means my levels will be down far enough when I go to the blood work so that the doc okays the surgery soon. We'll see. Worst case is that I keep treading water like I am now, right? Oh, and the shakes have stayed gone. Can't complain about that!
> 
> So, thanks for the thoughts about that meeting. I was sweating it for days, and I came through all right. If I hadn't, I figure I would have just adjusted to a new way of coping with it. I'm doing that a lot lately, and it's starting to help. (I'm starting to buy stock in 3M for Post-Its.)


So glad to hear you are doing so much better. What a blessing! When do you go for blood work? I hope you can have the surgery soon so you can get on w/your life for 2011.


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## Chase

I go for blood work on January 6 and have the appointment with the doc on January 13. I also go for that first counseling appointment on the 7th, so quite a few things will be happening in a short amount of time. I'm feeling pretty positive about that.

Also, a few days after I started the methimazole, I switched the time I took it to night time. It was zonking me in the middle of the day. That has really seemed to help a lot. It allows me to get a few ZZZZ at night without sucking down Tylenol PM to force it. Did or does anyone else do the same?


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## Andros

Chase said:


> I go for blood work on January 6 and have the appointment with the doc on January 13. I also go for that first counseling appointment on the 7th, so quite a few things will be happening in a short amount of time. I'm feeling pretty positive about that.
> 
> Also, a few days after I started the methimazole, I switched the time I took it to night time. It was zonking me in the middle of the day. That has really seemed to help a lot. It allows me to get a few ZZZZ at night without sucking down Tylenol PM to force it. Did or does anyone else do the same?


That was smart because everybody marches to a different drummer (circadian cycle) and no doubt has a lot to do w/ you feeling better.

You have the itinerary for January, I grant you that. And whatever you would be willing to share, I just know we all will be very interested and hopefully, helpful as well as supportive.


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## Chase

I like to think of the posts here as a kind of record for the journey. I found hope by coming here because I saw I wan't alone in this. People have been down this road, and that's what allowed me to be determined to take all this in stride and overcome it. I'm not saying there won't be tough days ahead - I know there will be, but it's about having the ability hash things out with people who really do know what you're feeling.

Also, I trust my doc, and that helps a TON. He's called this right from the get-go. I loved the fact that he called me HIMSELF with results. So, from now on, he's my Yoda for Graves' and all the things I must do hereafter. 

My decision to keep plowing ahead hasn't changed. In fact, it's gotten stronger since the meds have lessened some of the symptoms. The frustration that it takes time is still there, because that anxiety of things hasn't calmed down. I can deal with that, though, because logic prevails. My logical side knows meds take time to fully work, and I have to be patient with that. I have a million things that need to get done, and that's what I'm going to do!

Speaking of a million things, I need to get ready to go house hopping from family to family tonight. This is my first Christmas alone, and I mean ever. There are 8 kids in my family, and all their houses are so danged loud during the holidays! Thus, I have to keep the visitation schedule short on Christmas Eve (thankfully!). My mission is to make sure the kids are ready for Santa (Milk? Check. Cookies? Check. Carrots? Check. Bed on time? Not yet, but will be check.)

Once I'm done and have gone to midnight Mass, I think I'll come home tonight with a bottle of wine and listening to music while looking at the Christmas tree I managed to put up early last week.

Oh, and before I forget - check out *noradsanta.org *if you haven't seen it yet. NORAD tracks Santa throughout the world!

Merry Christmas, everyone. And thanks for the encouragement. You have all played a major part in my resolve to get better!

CHASE


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## Andros

Chase said:


> I like to think of the posts here as a kind of record for the journey. I found hope by coming here because I saw I wan't alone in this. People have been down this road, and that's what allowed me to be determined to take all this in stride and overcome it. I'm not saying there won't be tough days ahead - I know there will be, but it's about having the ability hash things out with people who really do know what you're feeling.
> 
> Also, I trust my doc, and that helps a TON. He's called this right from the get-go. I loved the fact that he called me HIMSELF with results. So, from now on, he's my Yoda for Graves' and all the things I must do hereafter.
> 
> My decision to keep plowing ahead hasn't changed. In fact, it's gotten stronger since the meds have lessened some of the symptoms. The frustration that it takes time is still there, because that anxiety of things hasn't calmed down. I can deal with that, though, because logic prevails. My logical side knows meds take time to fully work, and I have to be patient with that. I have a million things that need to get done, and that's what I'm going to do!
> 
> Speaking of a million things, I need to get ready to go house hopping from family to family tonight. This is my first Christmas alone, and I mean ever. There are 8 kids in my family, and all their houses are so danged loud during the holidays! Thus, I have to keep the visitation schedule short on Christmas Eve (thankfully!). My mission is to make sure the kids are ready for Santa (Milk? Check. Cookies? Check. Carrots? Check. Bed on time? Not yet, but will be check.)
> 
> Once I'm done and have gone to midnight Mass, I think I'll come home tonight with a bottle of wine and listening to music while looking at the Christmas tree I managed to put up early last week.
> 
> Oh, and before I forget - check out *noradsanta.org *if you haven't seen it yet. NORAD tracks Santa throughout the world!
> 
> Merry Christmas, everyone. And thanks for the encouragement. You have all played a major part in my resolve to get better!
> 
> CHASE


I love your plans for the evening and I do wish your enthusiasm would rub off on others. This will be your saving grace on your journey to wellness. There is much scientific proof supporting this.

I am the same way; always upbeat and positive in my thinking. Very very tenacious. It has a lot to do with why I am so well today and having quality of life.

Yes; there may be some down days and that is what we are here for in part. I am sure they will be few and far between in your case because of your wonderful attitude.

Logic prevails. Another thing I wish there was more of.

Merry Christmas to you and yours as well and God bless,


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## Chase

Whew. The Christmas crush is over! Actually, I spent a really enjoyable afternoon yesterday with my nephew target shooting. I love to shoot, but my hands had been shaking so bad over the last year that it was a waste of money. As my dad would have put it, "You were wavin' like Old Glory!" No, Dad, not waving - I like to call it the "Jackhammer". It's a lot like waving, only you do it about a hundred times faster, all the while trying to keep the firearm pointed down range. 

Chaos aside and to back up a couple of days, I came home from Mass on Christmas Eve, having gone to one earlier than planned, and did something I haven't been able to do in a while - played guitar. Music is a second job to me (I have been in a band for the last thirteen years), and Graves' really spanked the strength in my hands. It wasn't like I couldn't play at all, but my stamina to do it was gone, and my hands felt lost, like I was eight years old again. Sometimes, I'd have to look at the fret board to see what I was playing because I was flubbing chords I have never flubbed in my life. It was frustrating.

On a lark at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve, I decided to pull out one of my guitars to see how it would play since I had been having a couple of decent days of feeling good and the shakes had been gone for a few weeks already. I was afraid, though, because this test was going to be a benchmark for a lot of things, not just playing music. I pulled out one of the guitars. My cats immediately jumped into the case, as cats always seemed to do. So, I guess I had an audience.

And I started to play.

The next thing I knew, it was past two in the morning. I had been playing for over four hours! I paid for it the next day, but that's beside the point. I felt this unique renewal at being able to play again. I was determined before to never stop playing, but the Graves' had really diminished my capabilities because of the loss of strength. That night, I found myself playing songs and licks I hadn't thought about in years. It was like running into an old friend. I have found my music again. Or maybe it has found me. Either way, it feels good. It's like getting a piece of my identity back from the clutches of a disease I am still discovering.

No matter how hard I would try in the last six months, I couldn't articulate my hands like I had been able to for so many years. About a year or so ago was when I first noticed a significant change. My fingers wouldn't go where they were supposed to or, if they did hit the mark, they didn't have the ability to push down to make the chord. I got so frustrated after one gig that I went home and took my guitars off their stands (my guitars had always been left out in the open so that I could pick one up if I had a tune in my head) and put them back in their cases. I would only take them out if I had a gig, and that was becoming less and less frequent anyway.

I was so excited by this development that I brought my guitar with me on Christmas Day as we met out at my brother's farm. Everyone was in the other room. I sat by the fire in the den, playing some more, just to be sure. What had occurred the night before was not a fluke. I played as well the next day as I had the night before, and that was quite possibly the best gift I have ever been given.

I feel like a door has opened. It's not the most perfect door, because I have a lot of conditioning to do with my hands to get them back to their previous abilities. It's the fact that the shakes are gone that I think has really made it possible for me to get back what I thought I lost.

So, there's my good thought for the day!


----------



## Debbie from Milwaukee

Chase:
That is a wonderful story about your renewed guitar playing! I can appreciate it because my husband has been a lifelong guitariest as well. He absolutely wouldn't know what to do if he became unable to play. He has a Takamini acoustic with a beautiful sound and has been playing nearly 40 years. So glad you have your mojo back and can build up your callouses again!


----------



## Chase

I started buying Seagulls years ago (I think they go by Grodin now). They're made in Ontario, and I just love the sound for what I play. I always thought, "Take my sight, but don't take my hands or ears."

It was a feeling I really needed this Christmas. It was lonlier than I expected without my dad. I like to think he and my mom were hanging out with the cats and listening to me get reaquainted with something I love so much. 

So, tell your husband you know someone else who feels the same about playing!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Whew. The Christmas crush is over! Actually, I spent a really enjoyable afternoon yesterday with my nephew target shooting. I love to shoot, but my hands had been shaking so bad over the last year that it was a waste of money. As my dad would have put it, "You were wavin' like Old Glory!" No, Dad, not waving - I like to call it the "Jackhammer". It's a lot like waving, only you do it about a hundred times faster, all the while trying to keep the firearm pointed down range.
> 
> Chaos aside and to back up a couple of days, I came home from Mass on Christmas Eve, having gone to one earlier than planned, and did something I haven't been able to do in a while - played guitar. Music is a second job to me (I have been in a band for the last thirteen years), and Graves' really spanked the strength in my hands. It wasn't like I couldn't play at all, but my stamina to do it was gone, and my hands felt lost, like I was eight years old again. Sometimes, I'd have to look at the fret board to see what I was playing because I was flubbing chords I have never flubbed in my life. It was frustrating.
> 
> On a lark at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve, I decided to pull out one of my guitars to see how it would play since I had been having a couple of decent days of feeling good and the shakes had been gone for a few weeks already. I was afraid, though, because this test was going to be a benchmark for a lot of things, not just playing music. I pulled out one of the guitars. My cats immediately jumped into the case, as cats always seemed to do. So, I guess I had an audience.
> 
> And I started to play.
> 
> The next thing I knew, it was past two in the morning. I had been playing for over four hours! I paid for it the next day, but that's beside the point. I felt this unique renewal at being able to play again. I was determined before to never stop playing, but the Graves' had really diminished my capabilities because of the loss of strength. That night, I found myself playing songs and licks I hadn't thought about in years. It was like running into an old friend. I have found my music again. Or maybe it has found me. Either way, it feels good. It's like getting a piece of my identity back from the clutches of a disease I am still discovering.
> 
> No matter how hard I would try in the last six months, I couldn't articulate my hands like I had been able to for so many years. About a year or so ago was when I first noticed a significant change. My fingers wouldn't go where they were supposed to or, if they did hit the mark, they didn't have the ability to push down to make the chord. I got so frustrated after one gig that I went home and took my guitars off their stands (my guitars had always been left out in the open so that I could pick one up if I had a tune in my head) and put them back in their cases. I would only take them out if I had a gig, and that was becoming less and less frequent anyway.
> 
> I was so excited by this development that I brought my guitar with me on Christmas Day as we met out at my brother's farm. Everyone was in the other room. I sat by the fire in the den, playing some more, just to be sure. What had occurred the night before was not a fluke. I played as well the next day as I had the night before, and that was quite possibly the best gift I have ever been given.
> 
> I feel like a door has opened. It's not the most perfect door, because I have a lot of conditioning to do with my hands to get them back to their previous abilities. It's the fact that the shakes are gone that I think has really made it possible for me to get back what I thought I lost.
> 
> So, there's my good thought for the day!


What a glorious journey we are having w/ you! Thank you so much for sharing this story.

Love that guitar!


----------



## Chase

Thank you again, Andros. I am trying to keep things in perspective. While I was rejoicing at my ability to play, the fact that my niece, who was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes this past year, finally let loose with all she had been feeling. All it took was three shots of an adult beverage and a few minutes of alone time for everything - all the emotions and fear and resentment of her disease - to come rushing forth. She cried, literally, into my shoulder about everything she felt. It was bittersweet because she finally revealed all that she felt, but there was nothing I could do about it except give her the ear she needed. I lived most of my life with a diabetic father. The difference was that he was type 2, whereas she's had to put the complete brakes on her life when she should be at her prime and enjoying being a college student.

I don't have an answer for her except to say that I understand what it feels like to have your life turned upside down and not have had a clue it was about to blindside you. Other than that, I have no real words of comfort for her except to let her cry as long as she needs. I, on the the other hand, refuse to cry about Graves'. If I do, it means I give it power over me, and that's goes against my stubborn grain. In the end, no matter what you have, you have it. End of story. The question becomes what you're going to do about it, also end of story.

At least that's how I feel, anyway. I think being a bit older helps, but I think I'll always struggle for the right words when trying to console the young folk about some things.


----------



## Debbie from Milwaukee

Chase:

Please don't be too quick to knock your consoling skills. I think that simply doing some compassionate listening may be "just what the doctor ordered" for your neice. It is difficult most times in our society for someone to verbalize and emote about a circumstance that is absolutely overwhelming, let alone express it to family. The fact that you DIDN'T jump in with some kind of fix or solution was probably the best response. It sounds like your neice needed to do some intense grieving, and you gave her that opportunity as a gift. This episode will send her a little further down the road of emotional healing so that she regains the strength to manage her health condition.

You also are correct that your response to Grave's disease of not crying is the correct one for YOU. Everyone processes and grieves life challenges differently, and you need to proceed in the way that empowers you. I give you a lot of credit that you did NOT prescribe your own coping style onto your neice but instead gave her the emotional space that she needed.


----------



## Chase

Thank you for giving me that perspective, Debbie. I didn't think of it that way until you said it. I'm hoping you're right that it opens a door for her to wrangle the emotions that are bottled up in side of her. She's a great kid who is about a year away from being a teacher. I'm hoping she'll be able to use what has happened to her to help kids who are younger but going through the same thing.


----------



## Andros

[quote name='Chase']Thank you again, Andros. I am trying to keep things in perspective. While I was rejoicing at my ability to play, the fact that my niece, who was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes this past year, finally let loose with all she had been feeling. All it took was three shots of an adult beverage and a few minutes of alone time for everything - all the emotions and fear and resentment of her disease - to come rushing forth. She cried, literally, into my shoulder about everything she felt. It was bittersweet because she finally revealed all that she felt, but there was nothing I could do about it except give her the ear she needed. I lived most of my life with a diabetic father. The difference was that he was type 2, whereas she's had to put the complete brakes on her life when she should be at her prime and enjoying being a college student.

I don't have an answer for her except to say that I understand what it feels like to have your life turned upside down and not have had a clue it was about to blindside you. Other than that, I have no real words of comfort for her except to let her cry as long as she needs. I, on the the other hand, refuse to cry about Graves'. If I do, it means I give it power over me, and that's goes against my stubborn grain. In the end, no matter what you have, you have it. End of story. The question becomes what you're going to do about it, also end of story.

At least that's how I feel, anyway. I think being a bit older helps, but I think I'll always struggle for the right words when trying to console the young folk about some things.[/QUOTE

You are very pragmatic yet sensitive. 2 very wonderful qualities.

You know what they say and it is ever so true; "When the going gets tough, the tough get going!" Yowza, yowza!!!

Feel badly for your niece; Type I is a beast. She can do it though. She "really" can and it needn't spoil her life. Actually, it can make her life better. Just depends on how she choses to handle this. She is lucky to have you in her life.


----------



## Chase

So, here's an interesting development of a totally different thing - I am preparing to pass on a torch of sorts this year. At least I will on Friday, anyway. For YEARS (like since I was sixyears old), I have made or helped to make sauerkraut balls for the family's New Year's Eve party. No fewer than 300 of those puppies have rolled out of my kitchen since I was 15. Now, they are produced under the observing eyes of nieces and nephews who were there to assist in the making thereof.

However, at the family Christmas party December 19, two of my older nieces approached me and said, "If it's okay, we want to make them this year. We think we can do it."

Gee, I don't know.... 

Now, this is where it gets funny for me. These kids think it's something I LOVE to do. No, kids, I hate to tell you I don't like getting my hands frozen in kraut ball guts, the prep to them is hell on wheels for hours on end, and my back feels like I'm the Hunchback of Notre Dame by the time I get done rolling the balls, dipping them into the egg, flour, and breadcrumb coating. Oh, and let's not forget the obligatory deep fryer duty, where one can easily get dots of blisters from the oil as it makes that golden coating everyone loves. Nope, it hasn't been fun since I was eight years old except to watch people enjoy eating them so much. That look on their faces is the big payoff, always has been.

Of course, I have to play this the right way so that I can successfully extricate myself from ever being responsible for them again. You can read that as "no matter how bad they are, they're going to be the best sauerkraut balls you've ever had."

For me, this couldn't have come at a better time. It's just not in my willpower to deal with them this year. (Graves' has a slice of irony to it, no?) So, I'm going to take the girls to the grocery store, where they will be tasked to pick out the correct ingredients according to the instructions in my mother's recipe book. Then, they have to put it all together. And believe me, it's all about the prep. Did you chop the onions and garlic fine? Did you remember to save some of the sauerkraut juice? Oh, and I don't like stringy sauerkraut balls. Better chop those fine, too...

Ah, time changes the things we do in life. This is one of those changes I think I'm going to enjoy.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> So, here's an interesting development of a totally different thing - I am preparing to pass on a torch of sorts this year. At least I will on Friday, anyway. For YEARS (like since I was sixyears old), I have made or helped to make sauerkraut balls for the family's New Year's Eve party. No fewer than 300 of those puppies have rolled out of my kitchen since I was 15. Now, they are produced under the observing eyes of nieces and nephews who were there to assist in the making thereof.
> 
> However, at the family Christmas party December 19, two of my older nieces approached me and said, "If it's okay, we want to make them this year. We think we can do it."
> 
> Gee, I don't know....
> 
> Now, this is where it gets funny for me. These kids think it's something I LOVE to do. No, kids, I hate to tell you I don't like getting my hands frozen in kraut ball guts, the prep to them is hell on wheels for hours on end, and my back feels like I'm the Hunchback of Notre Dame by the time I get done rolling the balls, dipping them into the egg, flour, and breadcrumb coating. Oh, and let's not forget the obligatory deep fryer duty, where one can easily get dots of blisters from the oil as it makes that golden coating everyone loves. Nope, it hasn't been fun since I was eight years old except to watch people enjoy eating them so much. That look on their faces is the big payoff, always has been.
> 
> Of course, I have to play this the right way so that I can successfully extricate myself from ever being responsible for them again. You can read that as "no matter how bad they are, they're going to be the best sauerkraut balls you've ever had."
> 
> For me, this couldn't have come at a better time. It's just not in my willpower to deal with them this year. (Graves' has a slice of irony to it, no?) So, I'm going to take the girls to the grocery store, where they will be tasked to pick out the correct ingredients according to the instructions in my mother's recipe book. Then, they have to put it all together. And believe me, it's all about the prep. Did you chop the onions and garlic fine? Did you remember to save some of the sauerkraut juice? Oh, and I don't like stringy sauerkraut balls. Better chop those fine, too...
> 
> Ah, time changes the things we do in life. This is one of those changes I think I'm going to enjoy.


I don't know about the others here but you are bringing huge smiles to my face and my heart. What a "puppy upper!"

Lovely story and yes; perhaps it is time to designate the work to others w/you hovering nearby.

Please let us know how the Sauerkraut Balls turn out.


----------



## Chase

Alas, my dreams of fully passing on the tradition were shattered!

The older niece came down with strep throat, leaving me one elder kid down on the team! Thus, the aunt (me) had to step in and lead the pack once more, pretty much doing my usual duty with assistance from the kids. We whacked out the usual yield, though, and I was proud of the youngens and their efforts! They really worked hard!! We still need to come to an understanding of what "fine chop" means, but these balls turned out better, I think, than ever! It's truly the best mix we've ever made, I think.

More than that, though, there was a really interesting bonding between me and one of my nieces. I didn't know until today that she loved to write. Wow, so do I! When I lay down to sleep in a few minutes, I can do so confident that I have learned something new that I didn't know before - someone else in the family likes to spin yarns on paper! She and I will have much to talk about in the coming months.

She showed me some of her stuff, and I was shocked at how good it was. I have loved to write since I was in the fifth grade. She brought me right back to that love and the journey that it is to tell a story! Like playing music, writing had lost its mojo, too. I'm starting to get that back slowly but surely.

I love the moments I learn about these nieces and nephews of mine as they grow. I learn that they are much more than elven assistance in making sauerkraut balls. It's the conversation in between that teaches me to remember the wonder of their age and to remember the joy I had in writing. I lost that somewhere along the way, and I'm pretty certain it's due to Graves'. However, her enthusiasm sparked my hope for it again today.

Gifts are given in strange ways. We'll see what happens in the next few months...


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Alas, my dreams of fully passing on the tradition were shattered!
> 
> The older niece came down with strep throat, leaving me one elder kid down on the team! Thus, the aunt (me) had to step in and lead the pack once more, pretty much doing my usual duty with assistance from the kids. We whacked out the usual yield, though, and I was proud of the youngens and their efforts! They really worked hard!! We still need to come to an understanding of what "fine chop" means, but these balls turned out better, I think, than ever! It's truly the best mix we've ever made, I think.
> 
> More than that, though, there was a really interesting bonding between me and one of my nieces. I didn't know until today that she loved to write. Wow, so do I! When I lay down to sleep in a few minutes, I can do so confident that I have learned something new that I didn't know before - someone else in the family likes to spin yarns on paper! She and I will have much to talk about in the coming months.
> 
> She showed me some of her stuff, and I was shocked at how good it was. I have loved to write since I was in the fifth grade. She brought me right back to that love and the journey that it is to tell a story! Like playing music, writing had lost its mojo, too. I'm starting to get that back slowly but surely.
> 
> I love the moments I learn about these nieces and nephews of mine as they grow. I learn that they are much more than elven assistance in making sauerkraut balls. It's the conversation in between that teaches me to remember the wonder of their age and to remember the joy I had in writing. I lost that somewhere along the way, and I'm pretty certain it's due to Graves'. However, her enthusiasm sparked my hope for it again today.
> 
> Gifts are given in strange ways. We'll see what happens in the next few months...


And thank you for sharing the "gift" with all of us. I like the way your brain works; I really really do.

You have started my day out in a most pleasant way and have planted the seed for much thought.

Hugs,


----------



## Chase

Y'know, Andros, I have learned in the last few years to do something productive every night, and that is to think of something I learned that I didn't know before that day. No matter how crappy I may be feeling, I always manage to learn something. So, I fell asleep pretty confident that night!

As a new development, something happened this weekend that hasn't occurred in what feels (and probably is) years - I dreamed. Three days in a row, I had the most vivid dreams (two of which may make it to paper some day!). For so long now, it's seemed like I have gone to bed, finally managed to fall asleep, and woken up six minutes later to get ready for work. No zany imagery to chew upon during the day. (On the other hand, no nightmares, either.) I'm betting it's been over five years since I've dreamed or at least remembered doing so.

I don't know if anyone else has had that happen - going from no dreams to really vivid ones - but it was amazing. It's given me some confidence about the blood work this week, that the levels will be low enough for the surgery to get the green light. I can't help but think that the hyperthyroid junk had put the stop on REM for a long time, so long that I didn't even notice it except to note that I didn't dream. Now that the methimazole is kicking into gear (nice heart rate, lower systolic BP, memory issues starting to settle just a bit, anxiety starting to lessen ever so slightly), I'm wondering if this is another benefit.

In the meantime, I am enjoying dreaming. It's as though I can even control what goes on in them, as opposed to feeling like I fell asleep in complete darkness and awoke in the same. Weird, eh?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Y'know, Andros, I have learned in the last few years to do something productive every night, and that is to think of something I learned that I didn't know before that day. No matter how crappy I may be feeling, I always manage to learn something. So, I fell asleep pretty confident that night!
> 
> As a new development, something happened this weekend that hasn't occurred in what feels (and probably is) years - I dreamed. Three days in a row, I had the most vivid dreams (two of which may make it to paper some day!). For so long now, it's seemed like I have gone to bed, finally managed to fall asleep, and woken up six minutes later to get ready for work. No zany imagery to chew upon during the day. (On the other hand, no nightmares, either.) I'm betting it's been over five years since I've dreamed or at least remembered doing so.
> 
> I don't know if anyone else has had that happen - going from no dreams to really vivid ones - but it was amazing. It's given me some confidence about the blood work this week, that the levels will be low enough for the surgery to get the green light. I can't help but think that the hyperthyroid junk had put the stop on REM for a long time, so long that I didn't even notice it except to note that I didn't dream. Now that the methimazole is kicking into gear (nice heart rate, lower systolic BP, memory issues starting to settle just a bit, anxiety starting to lessen ever so slightly), I'm wondering if this is another benefit.
> 
> In the meantime, I am enjoying dreaming. It's as though I can even control what goes on in them, as opposed to feeling like I fell asleep in complete darkness and awoke in the same. Weird, eh?


It probably is the fact that the Methimazole has you near or in the euthyroid state. I did not have a dream for many many years and in the aftermath of being treated for Graves' Disease and getting stable (euthyroid) on my thyroxine replacement; oh, my goodness. What a shock. Dreaming again! Whooooooooohoo!!

I can only presume that when hormones are whacked, the patient does not enter the REM stage and therefore no "nightly entertainment?" Hmmmmmmmmm???

The more I learn (which I love), the more I realize there is to learn. If a person has gone through an entire 24 hour day w/o learning anything; how sad is that?


----------



## Chase

I can't tell you what a relief it is to hear (see) you say that you didn't dream, either. I thought that was part of me losing my mind. (It happened to those Elm Street kids, y'know, only they did ON PURPOSE to avoid Freddy.  ) Not only did I have these wickedly vivid dreams, but I woke up feeling like I had gotten all the rest my body needed, even though it wasn't even close to being a full 8 hours.

I keep seeing flashes of the dreams I had these last couple of nights while doing mindless work today. I imagine it's like being blind and regaining your sight. The colors and details were so immense that I can't stop thinking about them. Granted, they were really strange dreams - like not a damned thing made sense in them, but they were full of action and life! I'm hoping it lasts and isn't a fluke. It was very powerful to have that experience again.

I have read where lack of REM sleep can lend to psychoses of various forms. One can't help but think that it goes so hand-in-hand with Graves' sometimes. One compliments the other to make you think the whole world is out to get you.

Of course, for some people, the world really IS out to get them. In that case, the paranoia is completely justified. (Spies have this problem.)

But I digress.

You're right about learning something every 24 hours. There's ALWAYS something to be learned. Otherwise, what a waste of time! For example, I have new words to look up from your last post!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I can't tell you what a relief it is to hear (see) you say that you didn't dream, either. I thought that was part of me losing my mind. (It happened to those Elm Street kids, y'know, only they did ON PURPOSE to avoid Freddy.  ) Not only did I have these wickedly vivid dreams, but I woke up feeling like I had gotten all the rest my body needed, even though it wasn't even close to being a full 8 hours.
> 
> I keep seeing flashes of the dreams I had these last couple of nights while doing mindless work today. I imagine it's like being blind and regaining your sight. The colors and details were so immense that I can't stop thinking about them. Granted, they were really strange dreams - like not a damned thing made sense in them, but they were full of action and life! I'm hoping it lasts and isn't a fluke. It was very powerful to have that experience again.
> 
> I have read where lack of REM sleep can lend to psychoses of various forms. One can't help but think that it goes so hand-in-hand with Graves' sometimes. One compliments the other to make you think the whole world is out to get you.
> 
> Of course, for some people, the world really IS out to get them. In that case, the paranoia is completely justified. (Spies have this problem.)
> 
> But I digress.
> 
> You're right about learning something every 24 hours. There's ALWAYS something to be learned. Otherwise, what a waste of time! For example, I have new words to look up from your last post!


I do wish we would have discussed the absence of dreams sooner so you would not have been upset about it.

Dreaming I believe, is an important part of our subconscious minds. My humble opinion is that not dreaming is a most unhealthy state. And of course we all know that REM sleep is the most restorative stage of our sleep.

I love words. Especially "new" ones.

Keep on dreaming my friend for this is a very very good sign.


----------



## Chase

I wasn't too upset about it, although I appreciate your concern. For so many years, I just chalked myself up to being an insomniac. I accepted it as not getting enough sleep so as to enter a dream state and called it even. It was happening long before I realized it. I think the Graves' diagnosis just put the spotlight on it I needed to recognize what was happening.

As Joni Mitchell sang in Big Yellow Taxi, "You don't know what you got 'til it's gone." Well, the dreaming is starting to come back. And all I can think is, "Holy jamoley - look at what I was missing!!!"

And I, too, love words. Etymology is always fun, as well as being essential to writing. I write as a hobby, and it does my heart good when I come up with a word to describe something that really clicks! Even simple words do just fine when one can pick the most effective out of a list and use it to the greatest advantage!

Oh, and I got a call back from the Red Cross folks about blood donation. The official word is that methimazole does NOT restrict one from donating. In fact, as long as the donor is not using any of the restricted medications they list at the time of donation (they have this chart thingy of them), and the donor can pass the physical part (don't be anemic, yaddah yaddah), there is nothing that keeps a Graves' patient from donating blood. So, yay for me! I can try to donate next week!

It has been such an important thing for me since I was able to donate to do it as often as allowed. So many lives are saved by it. I encourage everyone I know to donate. Most don't, but all it takes is just one more person to save a life. So, there's my pitch.

As Radar once wrote to his mother on M*A*S*H,

Simplistically yours,

CHASE


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I wasn't too upset about it, although I appreciate your concern. For so many years, I just chalked myself up to being an insomniac. I accepted it as not getting enough sleep so as to enter a dream state and called it even. It was happening long before I realized it. I think the Graves' diagnosis just put the spotlight on it I needed to recognize what was happening.
> 
> As Joni Mitchell sang in Big Yellow Taxi, "You don't know what you got 'til it's gone." Well, the dreaming is starting to come back. And all I can think is, "Holy jamoley - look at what I was missing!!!"
> 
> And I, too, love words. Etymology is always fun, as well as being essential to writing. I write as a hobby, and it does my heart good when I come up with a word to describe something that really clicks! Even simple words do just fine when one can pick the most effective out of a list and use it to the greatest advantage!
> 
> Oh, and I got a call back from the Red Cross folks about blood donation. The official word is that methimazole does NOT restrict one from donating. In fact, as long as the donor is not using any of the restricted medications they list at the time of donation (they have this chart thingy of them), and the donor can pass the physical part (don't be anemic, yaddah yaddah), there is nothing that keeps a Graves' patient from donating blood. So, yay for me! I can try to donate next week!
> 
> It has been such an important thing for me since I was able to donate to do it as often as allowed. So many lives are saved by it. I encourage everyone I know to donate. Most don't, but all it takes is just one more person to save a life. So, there's my pitch.
> 
> As Radar once wrote to his mother on M*A*S*H,
> 
> Simplistically yours,
> 
> CHASE


Boy, was I a huge M*A*S*H fan in days of yore!! Are we giving away our ages here?

You can pitch donating blood all you want. It probably is the single most life-saving thing in the entire world.


----------



## Chase

Let's just say I wasn't cognizant of the first two years, but we watched the rest of the eps first-run after that!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Let's just say I wasn't cognizant of the first two years, but we watched the rest of the eps first-run after that!


Gottcha'! LOL!!


----------



## Chase

So, after a number of weeks of starting to feel better, I woke up feeling pretty crappy this morning. My voice is gone, my joints ache, the pressure in my neck is up significantly, and it took everything I had to drag my buns into work. Ironically, I don't feel sick as in having a cold. I just don't feel good. My blood pressure was up this morning (182/77). (I know people say you can't feel high blood pressure, but I swear I know when it's running high.)

Not sure if I'm coming down with something or this is a side effect of methimazole. I'm not complaining, mind you. It's just significant that it's the first time since I started improving that I feel like I have done a 180. I'm going to give it a day or two and see if it's just a seasonal bug. I got my flu shot in the fall, so I'm not too worried about it being anything like that.

This is just another one of those "wait and see" aspects of life lately.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> So, after a number of weeks of starting to feel better, I woke up feeling pretty crappy this morning. My voice is gone, my joints ache, the pressure in my neck is up significantly, and it took everything I had to drag my buns into work. Ironically, I don't feel sick as in having a cold. I just don't feel good. My blood pressure was up this morning (182/77). (I know people say you can't feel high blood pressure, but I swear I know when it's running high.)
> 
> Not sure if I'm coming down with something or this is a side effect of methimazole. I'm not complaining, mind you. It's just significant that it's the first time since I started improving that I feel like I have done a 180. I'm going to give it a day or two and see if it's just a seasonal bug. I got my flu shot in the fall, so I'm not too worried about it being anything like that.
> 
> This is just another one of those "wait and see" aspects of life lately.


Well; let me ask you this! Did you dine upon some of those famous sauerkraut balls? Sodium effect maybe?

Hubby is making saurkraut balls today. Ha, ha!! Yum! I will let you know how they turn out.

Less common but more serious side effects include a decrease in white blood cells (agranulocytosis) and blood platelets (thrombocytopenia). Symptoms and signs of agranulocytosis include infections of the throat, the gastrointestinal tract, and skin with an overall feeling of illness and fever.
http://www.medicinenet.com/methimazole/article.htm

Perhaps it would be a good idea to just check in w/your doctor about this. I hope you feel better and please let us know.


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## Chase

I dined on them New Years Eve.  Those bad boys were gone within two hours of the party starting! I'm not kidding -I only got four of them, and that included taste-testing!

As for the doc, I hate to make the call. The blood work is tomorrow, and I see him next week. It's almost like their office is the only one in town. I have a suspicion I'd be told to wait until next Thursday anyway. I've never been one to run to a doc the same day I wake up not feeling good. (Hell, until this Graves' stuff, I've only gone when I was deathly ill, and even then it was kicking and screaming.)

That article you linked is pretty succinct. Good info in there. I'm on 30mg of methimazole per day, so I guess I'm in the moderately severe range. Unlike other folks, I was instructed to pop the 30mg at the same time. It seems to be an okay fit for me, as I have been feeling invincible up until today. I don't like to read too much into the drug side effects info. Every drug has them, but the likelihood of experiencing them is quite low most times. By law, though, they have to be stated by the drug companies.

Ever seen those commercials on TV for a prescription medication? "May cause dizziness, loss of blood pressure, nausea, mouth sores, hallucinogenic bunnies to appear, heartburn, rainbows, diarrhea, small horns to protrude from the head, an uncontrollable laughter, and utter financial ruin." It doesn't matter that only 3 people in 1000 experienced it. They have to say it. So, I play the odds. 

I think I'm going to wait this out today and see how I feel tomorrow. It could just be a bug getting to me. I WAS around urchins during the holidays. One even had strep. Although I was careful, ya can't Lysol an entire house (especially one that's not yours). It is what it is. However, I will keep the info from the drug info in mind and see how things pan out in the next day or two.

Oh, and I just gotta say this - - -

O-H----I-O
Go Buckeyes!!!!!!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I dined on them New Years Eve.  Those bad boys were gone within two hours of the party starting! I'm not kidding -I only got four of them, and that included taste-testing!
> 
> As for the doc, I hate to make the call. The blood work is tomorrow, and I see him next week. It's almost like their office is the only one in town. I have a suspicion I'd be told to wait until next Thursday anyway. I've never been one to run to a doc the same day I wake up not feeling good. (Hell, until this Graves' stuff, I've only gone when I was deathly ill, and even then it was kicking and screaming.)
> 
> That article you linked is pretty succinct. Good info in there. I'm on 30mg of methimazole per day, so I guess I'm in the moderately severe range. Unlike other folks, I was instructed to pop the 30mg at the same time. It seems to be an okay fit for me, as I have been feeling invincible up until today. I don't like to read too much into the drug side effects info. Every drug has them, but the likelihood of experiencing them is quite low most times. By law, though, they have to be stated by the drug companies.
> 
> Ever seen those commercials on TV for a prescription medication? "May cause dizziness, loss of blood pressure, nausea, mouth sores, hallucinogenic bunnies to appear, heartburn, rainbows, diarrhea, small horns to protrude from the head, an uncontrollable laughter, and utter financial ruin." It doesn't matter that only 3 people in 1000 experienced it. They have to say it. So, I play the odds.
> 
> I think I'm going to wait this out today and see how I feel tomorrow. It could just be a bug getting to me. I WAS around urchins during the holidays. One even had strep. Although I was careful, ya can't Lysol an entire house (especially one that's not yours). It is what it is. However, I will keep the info from the drug info in mind and see how things pan out in the next day or two.
> 
> Oh, and I just gotta say this - - -
> 
> O-H----I-O
> Go Buckeyes!!!!!!


Born and raised in Mahoning Co.

Methimazole has a very short half-life. Literally hours (2 to 3 depending) so you may benefit by taking more frequent doses (smaller, of course) and perhaps you would wish to discuss this with your doctor also?

Urchins carry bugs. Indeed they do. And may God bless all the little urchins!!

I have to be in pretty sad shape to see the doctor myself. Sometimes that is good and sometimes that is not so good.


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## Chase

Well, howdy, former-neighbor-two-counties-to-my-left (or right, depending on which way I'm facing...)! Born and raised and still in Akron, land of Zippy, blimps, and tires!

It's funny you should mention the half-life thing. I know exactly when time to take it is rolling around. My heart rate starts to rocket, and I feel like I'm on fast-forward. Fortunately, it's around when I get home from work, so I'm able to relax and let it wind down. By then, it's time for bed, and off I go.

I'll talk to him about it, though, next time I see him. Oh, and may I just say that methimazole is quite possibly the worst-tasting medication I have ever had the displeasure of ingesting? Flat, dry, acrid little pills, and God help you if they get stuck somewhere in your mouth or throat. Yech!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, howdy, former-neighbor-two-counties-to-my-left (or right, depending on which way I'm facing...)! Born and raised and still in Akron, land of Zippy, blimps, and tires!
> 
> It's funny you should mention the half-life thing. I know exactly when time to take it is rolling around. My heart rate starts to rocket, and I feel like I'm on fast-forward. Fortunately, it's around when I get home from work, so I'm able to relax and let it wind down. By then, it's time for bed, and off I go.
> 
> I'll talk to him about it, though, next time I see him. Oh, and may I just say that methimazole is quite possibly the worst-tasting medication I have ever had the displeasure of ingesting? Flat, dry, acrid little pills, and God help you if they get stuck somewhere in your mouth or throat. Yech!


How about that? Akron, Ohio. OMG!! Spent a lot of time in Akron and certainly remember the infamous Akron Tire!! Actually, my childhood years were spent in the Canfield/Boardman area. Idora Park, Canfield Fair, Mill Creek Park....................wow! That was eons ago.

Yes; Methimazole is yukky!! Bleck!


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## Chase

I have a brother who lives in Atwater. He and his wife go to the Canfield Fair every year. I don't think Idora Park is around anymore, though. I think someone bought the carousel to preserve it and then the land was sold (I could be thinking of another park, though, like Geauga Lake, which is most certainly gone).

Small world! I dig being an Ohioan. I like to visit other places, but there's no place like NEO to call home!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> I have a brother who lives in Atwater. He and his wife go to the Canfield Fair every year. I don't think Idora Park is around anymore, though. I think someone bought the carousel to preserve it and then the land was sold (I could be thinking of another park, though, like Geauga Lake, which is most certainly gone).
> 
> Small world! I dig being an Ohioan. I like to visit other places, but there's no place like NEO to call home!


Idora Park is closed and in shambles. How right you are. We used to go to Geneva on the lake in the summer. What fond memories.

I dig being a Buckeye also. I miss it. We are what we are. Environmental factors measured in.


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## Gurrrraves

Hello, I am new here.

I wish I could be as positive.:sad0049: It has been a long haul for me. Been told to see a shrink because I was crazy, I gained 50lbs in less then 4 months and no pigging out. I have always been small, now I have a body I do not recognize. :sick0012: I am feeling so gross, sore, tired and in pain. I am going to have surgery soon and only hope I can get rid of this weight. I really hate how I look and I have no control. I would be one of the rare ones who get fat! Just my luck. :tongue0015: My husband is terminal and I want to feel better and soon. He needs me at my best.

I am glad to have found this place. I have found some very helpful information. Glad to know I am not alone:hugs: Plus you have lots of fun little smiles to play with:tongue0013:

Shari


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## lavender

Born and raised in Cleveland, spent my college years in Wooster, and I have lived in Columbus the past 10 years. It's a small world. Welcome to the goitre belt.

I think I took my methimazole 3 times a day. Couldn't imagine trying to take it all at once.

I too can tell the second something changes with my heart rate, BP, whatever. It's pretty unpleasant, even if the docs say it's benign. I was just convinced my heart would explode. So glad to have a peaceful heart now.

I too have had no dreams most of my life. When I did have any, they were mostly nightmares, so I was not terribly upset. I just could never understand what other people were talking about. After two weeks on Armour, I actually had a good dream a few nights ago. Feeling tons of hope about my recovery now that I am what I believe is the right replacement med for me!


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## lavender

Gurrrraves said:


> Hello, I am new here.
> 
> I wish I could be as positive.:sad0049: It has been a long haul for me. Been told to see a shrink because I was crazy, I gained 50lbs in less then 4 months and no pigging out. I have always been small, now I have a body I do not recognize. :sick0012: I am feeling so gross, sore, tired and in pain. I am going to have surgery soon and only hope I can get rid of this weight. I really hate how I look and I have no control. I would be one of the rare ones who get fat! Just my luck. :tongue0015: My husband is terminal and I want to feel better and soon. He needs me at my best.
> 
> I am glad to have found this place. I have found some very helpful information. Glad to know I am not alone:hugs: Plus you have lots of fun little smiles to play with:tongue0013:
> 
> Shari


Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad and about your husband. This forum has been a great help to me. I too was told by doctors that nothing was wrong with me, that I needed anti-depressants, you name it, I heard it. I know it may seem scary, but I have found therapy to be a big help through this all. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Getting help does not mean you're crazy. It means you are brave enough to try to get through it and smart enough to see when you need help. None of us can make it alone.


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## lavender

mum2bradley said:


> I do too!! I am in Ontario and working on administrating the generation projects. I was totally on my butt for the first 5 weeks it took to get me diagnosed. Then about 3 to start back part time.
> I will be going for RAI in February.


I spent Christmas in Ontario and had a lovely time so thank you for all the work you do to keep the power on. I was only there a few nights and did not have much time to explore the city with Christmas festivities, but I absolutely loved the public transit system! My significant other is a Canadian, and I am seriously considering braving the cold and heading up North! I love what I see in Canada!


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## Chase

Gurrrraves said:


> Hello, I am new here.
> 
> I wish I could be as positive.:sad0049: It has been a long haul for me. Been told to see a shrink because I was crazy, I gained 50lbs in less then 4 months and no pigging out. I have always been small, now I have a body I do not recognize. :sick0012: I am feeling so gross, sore, tired and in pain. I am going to have surgery soon and only hope I can get rid of this weight. I really hate how I look and I have no control. I would be one of the rare ones who get fat! Just my luck. :tongue0015: My husband is terminal and I want to feel better and soon. He needs me at my best.


Shari,

First, welcome to the boards! I'm a newcomer, too. It has been a great help to see that people share the same symptoms and frustrations that go with Graves'. One thing that is for sure, Graves' makes your physical well-being a complete trainwreck. Add in to that the illness of a loved one, or in my case the death of my father, and the overload starts to really get its claws into you. It's a fine line to walk - taking care of yourself and others all at the same time. And sometimes, we wobble from side to side, straddling that line as we go along.

Let me offer a few thoughts to you:

a) You are NOT gross and ugly. I have no clue what you look like, but the resulting changes in your physiology are not in your control. Would you tell someone who had been horribly disfigured with a burn that he or she was gross and ugly? Chances are, no you wouldn't. This is no different. The crosses we bear come in all shapes and sizes. At this moment in time, you are what you are. And one day, you'll get back to where you were. So, you have to cut yourself some slack in that area.

b) The stress you feel with your husband's illness must be overwhelming. The ability to juggle all that stress while feeling like hell is no picnic by any stretch of the imagination. But consider this - even at this moment, you ARE at your best. However, it's not as good as you want it to be or know it could be provided your health was in a better state. Graves' makes you tired and impatient and saps your will to complete even the most mundane tasks. This is not so different when dealing with chronic health issues of a loved one that consumes every ounce of your energy. You're doing the best you can, which is all anyone (including yourself) can ask of you.

Tomorrow, I go for my first counseling session. I realized I had too much on my plate to keep going the way I have been. It's still piling up, and I want to control what I can while I can before it's too late. If someone had asked me a year ago to get a counseling session, I would have told him or her to pound salt. I wouldn't have been caught dead in a shrink's office. Now, I know it's something I need, just as surely as I need medication to shut down my thyroid so it can be removed. It's about health - the whole ball of wax. It's not such a bad idea to get some talk time in with a third party. It may help more than you know.

Yes, I decided Graves' would not keep me down. That was a conscious decision, because there's no other way that would have occurred. We decide what we're having for breakfast, where we'll go on vacation, when we'll visit friends, but we never think to make a decision to live every day. Most of us just do it by rote. Then, along comes Graves', and everything you do until you get "cured" is a decision.

Every day, I have to decide to put my foot on the floor, and then the other, and stand and stumble into the bathroom, and shower, and change, and so on and so forth, until I am in my truck and on the way to the office. Then, I have to decide to get out of the truck. Every day, I say to myself, "I'm going to go in there and be productive." Does it always help? Nah. But it's a start.

Allow me a moment to be your cheerleader: yes, you CAN get through this, and yes, life WILL one day be good again. Any time you need to be reminded of that, visit the boards. You'll find a ton of people waiting to tell you the same.

Most of all, hang in there. We're all in this together. :anim_32:

P.S.

Yep, the emoticons on here are great!


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## Chase

lavender said:


> Born and raised in Cleveland, spent my college years in Wooster, and I have lived in Columbus the past 10 years. It's a small world. Welcome to the goitre belt.
> 
> I think I took my methimazole 3 times a day. Couldn't imagine trying to take it all at once.
> 
> I too can tell the second something changes with my heart rate, BP, whatever. It's pretty unpleasant, even if the docs say it's benign. I was just convinced my heart would explode. So glad to have a peaceful heart now.
> 
> I too have had no dreams most of my life. When I did have any, they were mostly nightmares, so I was not terribly upset. I just could never understand what other people were talking about. After two weeks on Armour, I actually had a good dream a few nights ago. Feeling tons of hope about my recovery now that I am what I believe is the right replacement med for me!


LOL, goitre belt. I gotta remember that one!

Actually, I read an article somewhere about the geographic prevalence of Graves', but it's usually in under-developed countries. I'll have to look that up again.

Oh, and it's good to see there's another Buckeye on board!

And as for dreaming, I just can't get over how vivid things are in them in these last few days. I keep wondering, "How did I not realize this was happening for so long?" I do know what you're saying about listening to other people describe their dreams. I had absolutely nothing to contribute at ALL. This was probably a blessing when my mom died, because my sisters were dreaming about her all the time. Me, I was at least able to sleep to make it through that time. Alas, something good comes of everything!


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## lavender

Chase said:


> LOL, goitre belt. I gotta remember that one!
> 
> Actually, I read an article somewhere about the geographic prevalence of Graves', but it's usually in under-developed countries. I'll have to look that up again.
> 
> Oh, and it's good to see there's another Buckeye on board!
> 
> And as for dreaming, I just can't get over how vivid things are in them in these last few days. I keep wondering, "How did I not realize this was happening for so long?" I do know what you're saying about listening to other people describe their dreams. I had absolutely nothing to contribute at ALL. This was probably a blessing when my mom died, because my sisters were dreaming about her all the time. Me, I was at least able to sleep to make it through that time. Alas, something good comes of everything!


I actually heard a doc call Ohio, Michigan and I think Pennsylvania and Kentucky the goitre belt. She said it was historical going back to the Native Americans who lived here and that scientists thought they would solve it by adding iodine to our salt, but that it has not helped. Must be something in the air or the dirt.

Graves is pretty rare, but thyroid issues are not around here! My former doc told me that she saw tons of hypothyroid patients, but rarely saw someone who was hyper and had only seen 2 in 20 years who were as sick as I was! I see tons of people on the boards from these areas and the more I talk about what happened to me, the more people in my social circles come out of the woodwork. I even remember a severely depressed client I had last year who would quit taking her thyroid meds and end up in the psych hospital every few months. She was in her 70s and had been doing that for years. Now I understand why it affected her like that but at the time I was clueless!

I just keep talking about it in the hope that I can help someone else who might need their thyroid checked. I know I had a heck of a time convincing my doc to check mine, and it took being hospitalized to get treatment. The thyroid affects so much, and the good news is that it is treatable! We don't have to suffer!


----------



## Gurrrraves

lavender said:


> Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad and about your husband. This forum has been a great help to me. I too was told by doctors that nothing was wrong with me, that I needed anti-depressants, you name it, I heard it. I know it may seem scary, but I have found therapy to be a big help through this all. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Getting help does not mean you're crazy. It means you are brave enough to try to get through it and smart enough to see when you need help. None of us can make it alone.


Thanks Lavander,
I am working on help. I do have so much on my plate. I really have no idea how I am even functioning. My son and I have been going to a cancer support group, that has helped. We are not that old,my husband being terminal is the worst thing in the world. It is just tearing me up but not being well has been torture.
What makes me so mad is not being treated for so long because people thought it was just in my head. I thought I was going to die and I did not know what was wrong. I started to think I was crazy. My new doctor ( met her today) is pretty awesome and I am feeling much better knowing she is on my side and is moving things forward.
I can't go it alone and I am getting help for my son too. 
Thank you for your advice,


----------



## lavender

Gurrrraves said:


> Thanks Lavander,
> I am working on help. I do have so much on my plate. I really have no idea how I am even functioning. My son and I have been going to a cancer support group, that has helped. We are not that old,my husband being terminal is the worst thing in the world. It is just tearing me up but not being well has been torture.
> What makes me so mad is not being treated for so long because people thought it was just in my head. I thought I was going to die and I did not know what was wrong. I started to think I was crazy. My new doctor ( met her today) is pretty awesome and I am feeling much better knowing she is on my side and is moving things forward.
> I can't go it alone and I am getting help for my son too.
> Thank you for your advice,


I honestly don't know what to say to you about your husband because I know there is noting I can do to make it better. I can't imagine what you are going through with your illness on top of everything. I had a friend who was a young mother who died of breast cancer last new year's eve and I think of her and her family often. I just hope you are treasuring every moment you can. Do what you can and the rest will sort itself out in time. Now is not the time to try to be superwoman.

Stress triggers Graves and other auto-immune illness which makes is not all that surprising that you got sick in the midst of everything else. I love to meditate and have found that it has helped me through many difficult situations.

It is unfortunate that it takes so long for some of us to get diagnosed and in the meantime we end up feeling crazy and getting sicker. I too was scared that I was dying because my heart was racing and pounding so hard. It was scary and I still have no tolerance for any kind of heart palpitations no matter how much my doctor tells me they are not serious. Finding out I had a treatable illness and that my heart was just fine was such a relief! I am glad you have found a good doc. Hold on to her. They are hard to come by.

Sending you a big cyber hug.


----------



## Andros

lavender said:


> I actually heard a doc call Ohio, Michigan and I think Pennsylvania and Kentucky the goitre belt. She said it was historical going back to the Native Americans who lived here and that scientists thought they would solve it by adding iodine to our salt, but that it has not helped. Must be something in the air or the dirt.
> 
> Graves is pretty rare, but thyroid issues are not around here! My former doc told me that she saw tons of hypothyroid patients, but rarely saw someone who was hyper and had only seen 2 in 20 years who were as sick as I was! I see tons of people on the boards from these areas and the more I talk about what happened to me, the more people in my social circles come out of the woodwork. I even remember a severely depressed client I had last year who would quit taking her thyroid meds and end up in the psych hospital every few months. She was in her 70s and had been doing that for years. Now I understand why it affected her like that but at the time I was clueless!
> 
> I just keep talking about it in the hope that I can help someone else who might need their thyroid checked. I know I had a heck of a time convincing my doc to check mine, and it took being hospitalized to get treatment. The thyroid affects so much, and the good news is that it is treatable! We don't have to suffer!


It has to do w/testing in the desert. The winds have carried the nuclear stuff across the mid-west; hence the goiter belt. I have had a doctor tell me this when I said I was from Ohio.


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## Chase

Andros said:


> It has to do w/testing in the desert. The winds have carried the nuclear stuff across the mid-west; hence the goiter belt. I have had a doctor tell me this when I said I was from Ohio.


Nah, it's from all the alien artifacts they have stored at Wright-Patt and the Ravenna Arsenal. arty0049:


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Nah, it's from all the alien artifacts they have stored at Wright-Patt and the Ravenna Arsenal. arty0049:


LOL! Who the heck knows, right? You guess is as good as anybody else's!


----------



## Andros

Gurrrraves said:


> Thanks Lavander,
> I am working on help. I do have so much on my plate. I really have no idea how I am even functioning. My son and I have been going to a cancer support group, that has helped. We are not that old,my husband being terminal is the worst thing in the world. It is just tearing me up but not being well has been torture.
> What makes me so mad is not being treated for so long because people thought it was just in my head. I thought I was going to die and I did not know what was wrong. I started to think I was crazy. My new doctor ( met her today) is pretty awesome and I am feeling much better knowing she is on my side and is moving things forward.
> I can't go it alone and I am getting help for my son too.
> Thank you for your advice,


How are you feeling today? Are you on meds for the Hyperthyroid? Somehow I missed your original posting.

I just want you to know that I care deeply about what is happening in your family and am keeping "all" of you in prayer.










What a horrible circumstance to be in.

We are here for you at all times. If you need to rant; we can handle it.

Life is not fair!


----------



## lavender

Andros said:


> It has to do w/testing in the desert. The winds have carried the nuclear stuff across the mid-west; hence the goiter belt. I have had a doctor tell me this when I said I was from Ohio.


I bet there are lots of theories as to why. The doc I heard said it went back historically to even the native peoples that lived here, which would indicate that it was going on before all the nuclear testing. She seemed to indicate that there was some sort of deficiency in our soil other than iodine. If that's true, with all the mass produced food we are getting today, wouldn't thyroid disease go down in people who are not choosing to eat local?

She also had been recruited by the US army to treat people who had thyroid disease as a result of the nuclear testing at Bikini Island. Similar circumstance where the winds had carried the nuclear stuff to the other islands and those people got sick. The people who had been injured were not only treated free of charge but they were paid a considerable sum of money by our government. Interesting that they were willing to compensate those people, but those of us who are suffering here in the US have to pay for our own medical care and insurance. Oh, but that's a totally different can of worms and we don't have a politics forum on this board.


----------



## Chase

Yeah, I had heard of the Bikini Islands thing, too, although long before I even had a clue I was going to get whacked by the Graves' Fairie.

The difficult part is that there's not really a known genesis to Graves' (at least there's no consensus from what I've read). I think there are a ton of possibilities for causes, but it starts to clutter the mind sometimes. For example, my father was a defense engineer. Did he bring home something that started me on the road to a thyroid issue? Heck if I know. Or is it the industrial city I grew up in before they regulated what was coming out of smoke stacks? If that's true, then why don't more people have thyroid issues in this area? Or, if it's due to nuclear testing in Nevada, then we should all be goitered to within an inch of our lives.

The more I read, the more I get the feeling that this is a product of something that can't be identified, or it's an amalgamation of factors that come together to manifest the disease. To my knowledge, no one in my family has ever had Graves', especially my siblings who grew up in the same house I did within 20 years of one another. Therefore, in my mind, it's entirely possible that jelly beans cause it. (No offense, jelly beans. I still love you.) The causation almost seems moot sometimes, but I would love to see a lack of iodine nixed from the grocery list of possibilities. I am a saltaholic (not so much now, but I was). There was no lack of iodine in my diet. And yet here I are, diseased and riding the thyroidectomy wave.

The more I think about it, the more I realize this could be the great beginning of a conspiracy novel.


----------



## Chase

So, I'm fighting a cold today. However, the joint pain is pretty intense. It has been for over a week now. I'm still debating if it's due to this cold bug or it's possible the methimazole is taking a crack at my already-screwed knees. I actually had to have my niece go to the store for me this weekend because my joints hurt so much. The rest of me feels fine (sans cold, of course). I have been having good nights of sleep in these last few days, and I feel decent in terms of emotional things. (You can take that as I haven't had the urge to crawl into a cardboard box under the basement steps and hide from the world for a few hours.)

Also, I had that first counseling session last Friday. As I expected, it had some very difficult moments. However, they have to be talked about. I can't quite get a pulse on the psychologist at the moment, but she seems pretty even (I should hope, anyway!). It has given me some things to think about this week, and there was some validation about the anxiety attacks that helped quite a bit. I go back next week for another go-around. We'll see how that turns out. Overall, it's too early to have an opinion on what it has helped so far. We've just been setting the table, so to speak. I don't regret going, though. I'm determined to continue working through all this, and I know counseling will help.

School starts again today for me. MY FINAL SEMESTER BEFORE GRADUATION!!!!!!!!! If there's anything that will lift the spirits, that's it, no?

CHASE


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## lavender

Joint pain could be related to the meds or simply to being hyperT. I was personally in tons of pain while hyper. I never really felt better on the meds, felt like they were doing a number on my body, and opted for surgery. I do hope you feel better soon.

Congrats on starting your last semester at school! I just started back to classes this week. Taking a two week intensive course. I was pretty surprised at how well I felt sitting through a 4 hour class tonight.

No one in my family has thyroid disease either. My doc kept questioning me about my family history after I had to be hospitalized, and I honestly have no idea why my thyroid went so berserk besides that it was a response to years of stress.

I use non-iodized sea salt in a grinder and have for years. I think there's tons of iodine in the ffods we eat adn just prefer not to have the extra additives.


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## Chase

I have already started my internship (joy), and I do the classroom stuff starting this morning and tonight. It's actually easier in terms of my schedule than it has been in any other semester, really. I go to class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, with the only evening class happening on Tuesdays. That will help ease my stress at work considerably, I think.

As for the joint pain, I'm just going to continue sucking down Motrin and move along. That's quite the recurring theme, ain't it? "Move along. Move along. Move along."

Oh, and I LOVE cooking with sea salt. It took me a bit to get used to the portions for it, because it tastes so much more concentrated. However, it really is nice, especially from the grinder.

The older I get, the more appreciation I develop for spices and what they do to food. My mother was a master at using spices to their full potential. This is wonderful, except when I would ask what she had put into a dish, she'd say, "Oh, I don't know - a little bit of this, a little bit of that..." Grrrrr. I learned almost nothing in that department all those years watching her cook.

So, I decided to start experimenting with what was in her spice cabinet a few months after she passed away. It makes me laugh every time I figure out what she did to a dish to make it work! It's like making this incredible archaelogical discovery, only it's useful right at that moment!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> So, I'm fighting a cold today. However, the joint pain is pretty intense. It has been for over a week now. I'm still debating if it's due to this cold bug or it's possible the methimazole is taking a crack at my already-screwed knees. I actually had to have my niece go to the store for me this weekend because my joints hurt so much. The rest of me feels fine (sans cold, of course). I have been having good nights of sleep in these last few days, and I feel decent in terms of emotional things. (You can take that as I haven't had the urge to crawl into a cardboard box under the basement steps and hide from the world for a few hours.)
> 
> Also, I had that first counseling session last Friday. As I expected, it had some very difficult moments. However, they have to be talked about. I can't quite get a pulse on the psychologist at the moment, but she seems pretty even (I should hope, anyway!). It has given me some things to think about this week, and there was some validation about the anxiety attacks that helped quite a bit. I go back next week for another go-around. We'll see how that turns out. Overall, it's too early to have an opinion on what it has helped so far. We've just been setting the table, so to speak. I don't regret going, though. I'm determined to continue working through all this, and I know counseling will help.
> 
> School starts again today for me. MY FINAL SEMESTER BEFORE GRADUATION!!!!!!!!! If there's anything that will lift the spirits, that's it, no?
> 
> CHASE


Counseling helped me a lot in the aftermath of Graves' Disease. I absolutely recommend it. Counselors are trained specifically in the field of chronic illness and the emotion impact on the psyche!! You are one smart cookie!

Here is a gentle hug for what ails you {{{{{CHASE}}}}}

And? You area of study is?? Congratulations! It must be an awesome feeling to emerge from the other end of the tunnel!


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## Chase

Awww, thanks, Andros! I could use a hug today. Well, at least my knees could after traipsing across the campus to get books, parking passes, an Auntie Anne's pretzel, and a Zips National Soccer Champions shirt. 

In May, I will receive my BS in Emergency Management, which deals with disasters, how to prevent them, respond to them, and recover from them. I have had a ball going to school for it these last two years, but I sure am glad to almost be done! My professors are well-aware of my situation, and they have really, really been working with me to make sure I can keep my head above water for graduation. Unlike last semester (pre-methimazole), I sat down in class today and was completely alert and ready to engage in learning again. I can only imagine how good it will feel and be to get this thyroid out and start living again for real!

In the meantime, I have put my head down and starting plowing ahead again. I feel like I am picking up some steam now, ever cognizant of the fact that everyone is excited the first day of school. I parked at the campus today and just sat in my truck for a second. I realized that when I opened the door, it was going to be the first day of the end of a journey for me. I never thought I would graduate college with my bachelor's. I had gotten my AS in Criminal Justice and foolishly floundered after that, not finishing what I started. Next thing I knew, it was thirteen years later. Something gave me the bug in my ear to go back, only work wouldn't cover a sociology degree. I basically started over with the exception of some junk classes everyone has to take. But here I am, ready to get it done!

My only regret is that I won't see my parents when I walk at graduation. I know they'll be watching. But I won't see them. I will be only the second kid in the family out of 8 to get a BS or BA. I know they would have been proud.

My family is already planning a graduation party, if you can believe that! Not a surprise party, either. They're making it clear there will be a graduation party, period.  Can't ask for more than that from family can ya?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Awww, thanks, Andros! I could use a hug today. Well, at least my knees could after traipsing across the campus to get books, parking passes, an Auntie Anne's pretzel, and a Zips National Soccer Champions shirt.
> 
> In May, I will receive my BS in Emergency Management, which deals with disasters, how to prevent them, respond to them, and recover from them. I have had a ball going to school for it these last two years, but I sure am glad to almost be done! My professors are well-aware of my situation, and they have really, really been working with me to make sure I can keep my head above water for graduation. Unlike last semester (pre-methimazole), I sat down in class today and was completely alert and ready to engage in learning again. I can only imagine how good it will feel and be to get this thyroid out and start living again for real!
> 
> In the meantime, I have put my head down and starting plowing ahead again. I feel like I am picking up some steam now, ever cognizant of the fact that everyone is excited the first day of school. I parked at the campus today and just sat in my truck for a second. I realized that when I opened the door, it was going to be the first day of the end of a journey for me. I never thought I would graduate college with my bachelor's. I had gotten my AS in Criminal Justice and foolishly floundered after that, not finishing what I started. Next thing I knew, it was thirteen years later. Something gave me the bug in my ear to go back, only work wouldn't cover a sociology degree. I basically started over with the exception of some junk classes everyone has to take. But here I am, ready to get it done!
> 
> My only regret is that I won't see my parents when I walk at graduation. I know they'll be watching. But I won't see them. I will be only the second kid in the family out of 8 to get a BS or BA. I know they would have been proud.
> 
> My family is already planning a graduation party, if you can believe that! Not a surprise party, either. They're making it clear there will be a graduation party, period.  Can't ask for more than that from family can ya?


Oh, my!! You "are" a mover and a shaker! What a wonderful avocation/profession! It sounds like your "true" pathway!

You can bet that your parents will be watching. I just know they will be.

Thank you for sharing with us. And thank you for getting out there to change the scheme of all things not so good.

Are you nursing that cold? Hope you feel better!


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## Chase

Actually, I feel pretty good today except for some ninja sneezing (sneezes that just sneak up on you from out of nowhere). I have shaken off all but a few remnants of the cold, for which I am REALLY grateful, given the timing! So, thanks for asking!

As for the professional stuff, it's the first time I have been in school and known I was on the right track. Even though I work in the private sector and a lot of the education is geared toward the public sector, there hasn't been a class yet that I haven't taken something I've learned and applied it to my professional career. I am currently a Disaster Recovery Specialist for a utility company (that part deals with protecting technology), but I have already been tapped to branch out into the people-protection planning area, meaning making sure our workers are safe should an event occur. I really like what I do now, and it's a very unique degree (only 6 universities nationwide even offer the program). I'm glad you see it as an avocation. I do, too! I'm not sure where it will lead me professionally, but I'm REALLY enjoying the trip so far!


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## lavender

Chase said:


> I have already started my internship (joy), and I do the classroom stuff starting this morning and tonight. It's actually easier in terms of my schedule than it has been in any other semester, really. I go to class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, with the only evening class happening on Tuesdays. That will help ease my stress at work considerably, I think.
> 
> As for the joint pain, I'm just going to continue sucking down Motrin and move along. That's quite the recurring theme, ain't it? "Move along. Move along. Move along."
> 
> Oh, and I LOVE cooking with sea salt. It took me a bit to get used to the portions for it, because it tastes so much more concentrated. However, it really is nice, especially from the grinder.
> 
> The older I get, the more appreciation I develop for spices and what they do to food. My mother was a master at using spices to their full potential. This is wonderful, except when I would ask what she had put into a dish, she'd say, "Oh, I don't know - a little bit of this, a little bit of that..." Grrrrr. I learned almost nothing in that department all those years watching her cook.
> 
> So, I decided to start experimenting with what was in her spice cabinet a few months after she passed away. It makes me laugh every time I figure out what she did to a dish to make it work! It's like making this incredible archaelogical discovery, only it's useful right at that moment!


I got a mortar and pestle to grind down whole fresh spices for Christmas! It's tons of fun, a great anger tool, and I've been experimenting with all sorts of things. Making my own salad dressing without all the chemicals.

You will get through this semester just keep at it. It's awesome to hear how much you enjoy your work and how proud you are. I was the first in my family to earn my bachelor's and now I'm in grad school! I think we can go anywhere if we put our minds to it and just keep moving ahead.


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## Chase

Wow, Lavender, you really sum it up well - it's about state of mind and determination! Well, a better paycheck is also an incentive, but it's about doing what you want and feel is worthwhile!

When will you be done with school?


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## Chase

And just wanted to let everyone know that I donated blood this morning! It felt very good to do, and I feel like another part of me is back in the game!

I can't stress enough how important it is to give blood. It saves so many lives!


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## AngeInBoston

Hi Chase, good for you for giving blood! My Dad did every 6 or 8 weeks (whatever the minimum time is?) for over 50 years. He died last February, a week after he was turned away from the blood bank for the first time ever because the nurse told him he needed to have something checked (not sure if it was blood pressure or abnormal heartbeat?). He never did because he and my Mom don't trust Drs.  His official cause of death was hardened arteries, either a stroke or heart problem, not sure, he just slipped away while sitting on the couch. Now my Mom has undiagnosed Alzheimers and won't go to the Dr. either.

Anyway, I haven't been on for a while, and was just catching up. I'm glad you're having good dreams, my daughter has been having vivid nightmares.

When we went to her Endo last week, she told us her thyroid levels are normal now, which I know I should be jumping up and down with glee over, except for the fact that my daughter does not feel any better at all! If anything she feels worse! She has a horrible headache that never goes away, constant stomache ache, fatigue, sore throat, even burning urination recently, etc. The Endo said she cannot attribute those symptoms to the Graves since her levels are normal, and referred us back to her Pediatrician for a Lyme disease test and suggested a brain MRI. We went two days ago, and her Ped did a battery of tests....the one that alarmed me was when she couldn't get enough of looking into her eyes with the bright light, and then having her follow her finger with her eyes, my daughter's eyes would shake when looking up diagonally. She referred us to a Neurologist, and ordered a brain MRI ASAP, it's scheduled for tomorrow at Children's Hospital. I'm trying not to freak out, since it seems that every test she has comes back negative. (No strep or UTI).

I hope all goes well with you!

~Ange


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## Chase

Ange,

What a weight that must be on your shoulders right now! Neurological tests are always worrisome. My mother had several strokes, so I'm very familiar with brain issues and the fragile balance contained in the head.

I know it's cliched to tell you not to borrow trouble, because as a mom you're seeing things in your child that aren't normal. An MRI is an excellent diagnostic tool for the body. The positive thing you have to keep in mind is that you have been proactive with everything going on with your daughter, right up to this very moment. I suspect you'll continue doing the same until you have the answer to what is going on with her. So, I bestow upon you a gold star in advance. You've already earned it!

Focusing on some positive aspects, it sounds like you have a good ped who is paying attention to the different signals with your daughter and does not hedge in ordering some serious tests. That's invaluable. You have a hospital within reach where the MRI can be run. And neurologists are, pretty much as a rule, excellent at what they do. And that's assuming there's a need for a neuro with the MRI results. Everything might come back just fine and you're back to the drawing board.

And even after saying that, I know that does nothing to ease your mind. I wouldn't expect it to at all. You are permitted to freak out a bit as a mom (even if it's only in text on a message board). I would worry more if you had no anxiety at all and were completely okay with everything that has transpired in such a short time.

Try to keep a positive attitude as much as you can. You've done GREAT so far. Please let us know how the tests turn out. And I'll light a candle at Mass this Sunday, just for good measure for you and your daughter.

Hang in there!

CHASE


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## Andros

AngeInBoston said:


> Hi Chase, good for you for giving blood! My Dad did every 6 or 8 weeks (whatever the minimum time is?) for over 50 years. He died last February, a week after he was turned away from the blood bank for the first time ever because the nurse told him he needed to have something checked (not sure if it was blood pressure or abnormal heartbeat?). He never did because he and my Mom don't trust Drs.  His official cause of death was hardened arteries, either a stroke or heart problem, not sure, he just slipped away while sitting on the couch. Now my Mom has undiagnosed Alzheimers and won't go to the Dr. either.
> 
> Anyway, I haven't been on for a while, and was just catching up. I'm glad you're having good dreams, my daughter has been having vivid nightmares.
> 
> When we went to her Endo last week, she told us her thyroid levels are normal now, which I know I should be jumping up and down with glee over, except for the fact that my daughter does not feel any better at all! If anything she feels worse! She has a horrible headache that never goes away, constant stomache ache, fatigue, sore throat, even burning urination recently, etc. The Endo said she cannot attribute those symptoms to the Graves since her levels are normal, and referred us back to her Pediatrician for a Lyme disease test and suggested a brain MRI. We went two days ago, and her Ped did a battery of tests....the one that alarmed me was when she couldn't get enough of looking into her eyes with the bright light, and then having her follow her finger with her eyes, my daughter's eyes would shake when looking up diagonally. She referred us to a Neurologist, and ordered a brain MRI ASAP, it's scheduled for tomorrow at Children's Hospital. I'm trying not to freak out, since it seems that every test she has comes back negative. (No strep or UTI).
> 
> I hope all goes well with you!
> 
> ~Ange


Ange; are we talking Nystagmus? Please please let us know and I will keep you and your daughter in prayer.

What is normal? Can you share her labs and ranges? What is good for the goose is not always good for the gander, as they say.

Is your daughter on anti-thyroid med? If so, sore throat is a warning sign. Hope the doc checked her white blood cells?

Agranulocytosis almost always occurs within the first three months of starting treatment with an antithyroid drug. If you develop a sore throat, fever, or other signs or symptoms of infection, you should stop your medicine and immediately call your doctor or nurse. Serious and potentially life threatening infections, or even death, can occur before agranulocytosis resolves. However, once the antithyroid drug is stopped, agranulocytosis usually resolves within a week.

Please read ... http://www.uptodate.com/patients/content/topic.do?topicKey=~K7dgOAIby0pAB7


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## lavender

Chase said:


> Wow, Lavender, you really sum it up well - it's about state of mind and determination! Well, a better paycheck is also an incentive, but it's about doing what you want and feel is worthwhile!
> 
> When will you be done with school?


I just started last semester. I will be in school for three more years!


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## lavender

AngeInBoston said:


> Hi Chase, good for you for giving blood! My Dad did every 6 or 8 weeks (whatever the minimum time is?) for over 50 years. He died last February, a week after he was turned away from the blood bank for the first time ever because the nurse told him he needed to have something checked (not sure if it was blood pressure or abnormal heartbeat?). He never did because he and my Mom don't trust Drs.  His official cause of death was hardened arteries, either a stroke or heart problem, not sure, he just slipped away while sitting on the couch. Now my Mom has undiagnosed Alzheimers and won't go to the Dr. either.
> 
> Anyway, I haven't been on for a while, and was just catching up. I'm glad you're having good dreams, my daughter has been having vivid nightmares.
> 
> When we went to her Endo last week, she told us her thyroid levels are normal now, which I know I should be jumping up and down with glee over, except for the fact that my daughter does not feel any better at all! If anything she feels worse! She has a horrible headache that never goes away, constant stomache ache, fatigue, sore throat, even burning urination recently, etc. The Endo said she cannot attribute those symptoms to the Graves since her levels are normal, and referred us back to her Pediatrician for a Lyme disease test and suggested a brain MRI. We went two days ago, and her Ped did a battery of tests....the one that alarmed me was when she couldn't get enough of looking into her eyes with the bright light, and then having her follow her finger with her eyes, my daughter's eyes would shake when looking up diagonally. She referred us to a Neurologist, and ordered a brain MRI ASAP, it's scheduled for tomorrow at Children's Hospital. I'm trying not to freak out, since it seems that every test she has comes back negative. (No strep or UTI).
> 
> I hope all goes well with you!
> 
> ~Ange


Wow, you and your daughter are sure going through a whole lot! I know I did not feel better on the methimazole even when I was eurothyroid. That's why I opted for surgery. I am glad you have referrals to help you follow up on all this. I would be concerned about the possibility of an infection like a UTI which can be a complication of the methimazole.

My thoughts will be with you tomorrow. Please let us know how things turn out.


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## AngeInBoston

Thanks everyone! I'm ashamed to say I do not know what her "normal" thyroid levels are; they never give me the test results and I haven't asked for them. I'll try to get them tomorrow from the hospital. When we went to her Endo last week, we gave her a printed list of every symptom she has that we could think of, I've been giving it to everyone, but she treated us more like hypochondriacs than anything, although she did refer us back to our Pediatrician and recommended the MRI. I'm so confused. My daughter's school is demanding that I send her to school everyday, but she feels so sick she doesn't want to go, and when I force her to, she has a horrible day spent mostly in the nurse's office and guidance counselor's office, and she feels no one believes that she is really sick. Now the school has filed a CHINS and I need to bring her to court on 2/4! Everyone is telling her to go back to school and it freaks her out the second they say it because it marks them as not believing her, even though they say they do.

Now I'm kinda freaked about the eye vibrating, it's also why it took so long for the Ped to look inside her pupils, she kept asking her to keep staring at the same spot without moviing. After the Endo told us her levels were normal, I was like, "How can that be? She's still so sick?" and I pointed out her swolen eyelids and that she's saying she can't see well out of her glasses anymore, when they were new from July, and she told me the swelling may be permanent  and that I should take her to the Optometrist. Aaaaarrrgh! I'm so aggravated at everything, I just want to find out what is wrong with her, my Mommy intuition is insisting something truly is, and that she is NOT just school phobic and not truly sick or sick by reason of psychosomatic symptoms.

Thanks for letting me vent; I'll try to update with those thyroid levels!

Big blizzard today, we got 19" here!

~Ange


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## lavender

Oh wow, it certainly sounds like that endo is not treating you right! There might be something else going on, but I'm still wondering if your daughter's not responding well to the anti-thyroid meds. My endo would look at me like I had two heads when I told him how I felt too! He kept telling me to go back to my family doctor because my symptoms were not thyroid related, then she would tell me they were! Surprising that those "non-thyroid related symptoms" resolved immediately after surgery! I think that your mommy intuition is right on. Are you able to get into a new endo who will treat you better?

As for the eyelid, Graves can cause orbital swelling and there are treatments for it. Sounds like she may have Graves eye disease to me, and that would need to be evaluated by an ophthalmologist. Your regular optometrist might be a good first stop for a referral. I have had trouble seeing as well, and probably should follow up myself. Right now, I'm just tackling one task at a time, and that is not my first priority! My endo and family doc were absolutely no help with the eyes either. I think this really warrants another specialist.

And on top of everything, it sounds like the school is treating you (and your daughter) like a criminal! That sounds beyond frustrating! I assume the big meeting did not go well? Have they done anything to try to accommodate for her illness? Is your doctor willing to write something attesting to her condition that you could take to the school or court? Is there anyone on your side, fighting for your child in all this? I had to take 5 months off work from the time I was diagnosed until I was healed from surgery, and I'm still building up to full speed 5 months after surgery. It sounds like your daughter needs support services, not court and judges! I am wondering if she is eligible for an IEP (Individualized Education Plan).

I am sending big hugs to you and your daughter!


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## AngeInBoston

Thanks Lavender, I'm @ the hospital now waiting for the MRI. That big meeting at school right before Xmas was to make me promise to send her, unless she had a fever, which I regret being pressured into agreeing to because she feels so lousy every day but does NOT have a fever! They promise and promise to make all these accommodations for her, but she says they don't really act like they believe her once she's there, and she calls them Brain Melters got being able to brainwash us into believing them! At the meeting, I brought up the question of if she might be classified as 'Learning Disabled' because of her difficulty concentrating and remembering, and that triggered an IEP evaluation...now she just has to actually go to school for them to do some tests. Her Psychotherapist wrote a letter and had her Psychiatrist co-sign it, saying that she did not believe her to be school-phobic, and that she should be allowed home tutoring again and not be forced to go to school unless she feels up to it. I don't know if that was good enough for them.


----------



## Andros

AngeInBoston said:


> Thanks everyone! I'm ashamed to say I do not know what her "normal" thyroid levels are; they never give me the test results and I haven't asked for them. I'll try to get them tomorrow from the hospital. When we went to her Endo last week, we gave her a printed list of every symptom she has that we could think of, I've been giving it to everyone, but she treated us more like hypochondriacs than anything, although she did refer us back to our Pediatrician and recommended the MRI. I'm so confused. My daughter's school is demanding that I send her to school everyday, but she feels so sick she doesn't want to go, and when I force her to, she has a horrible day spent mostly in the nurse's office and guidance counselor's office, and she feels no one believes that she is really sick. Now the school has filed a CHINS and I need to bring her to court on 2/4! Everyone is telling her to go back to school and it freaks her out the second they say it because it marks them as not believing her, even though they say they do.
> 
> Now I'm kinda freaked about the eye vibrating, it's also why it took so long for the Ped to look inside her pupils, she kept asking her to keep staring at the same spot without moviing. After the Endo told us her levels were normal, I was like, "How can that be? She's still so sick?" and I pointed out her swolen eyelids and that she's saying she can't see well out of her glasses anymore, when they were new from July, and she told me the swelling may be permanent  and that I should take her to the Optometrist. Aaaaarrrgh! I'm so aggravated at everything, I just want to find out what is wrong with her, my Mommy intuition is insisting something truly is, and that she is NOT just school phobic and not truly sick or sick by reason of psychosomatic symptoms.
> 
> Thanks for letting me vent; I'll try to update with those thyroid levels!
> 
> Big blizzard today, we got 19" here!
> 
> ~Ange


I can guarantee you there are very few reasons why a young lady would not want to go to school and be among her peer group.

Here is some info on acquired Nystagmus.

Acquired nystagmus can be caused by a disease (multiple sclerosis, brain tumor, diabetic neuropathy), an accident (head injury), or a neurological problem (side effect of a medication). Hyperventilation, a flashing light in front of one eye, nicotine and even vibrations have been known to cause nystagmus in rare cases. Some acquired nystagmuses can be treated with medications or surgeries.

You can read all the reasons on the link below.

Read more: http://www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/nystagmus.htm#ixzz1AvZ0aDpU

You daughter may benefit from also being checked for diabetes. When is the MRI scheduled? I would also look to her medication as being a cause.

If you were to take her anywhere about her eyes, I would strongly suggest a Board Certified Ophthalmologist.

I hate this for you and especially for your daughter. It is my humble opinion that it is extremely important for you and other close family members to "validate" this child. Very important.


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## lavender

Funny that home tutoring was exactly what I was thinking of. I sure how they are able to arrange this for you. And once her condition is under control, hopefully she will be able to return to a classroom again. I am glad you got some support from the psychotherapist and psychiatrist.

I hope they are able to do the IEP evaluation soon. Schools are required to accommodate children with disabilities. I think some schools just require a little bit more pressure to put services in place. It sounds like that is the situation you are facing. From my understanding, an IEP must be completed if a child has a disability that interferes with their ability to learn, which I would definitely say that Graves does from my own experience. Does the IEP testing have to be scheduled? Can they make an accommodation for her to be able to take the test?

I am not sure what is available to you, but I just wish there was an advocate to help you through all this. I suspect there is a lot of education based jargon that you need to know to really advocate for her, and someone there to walk you through it all could be priceless. Is there anyone at the school who you felt was helpful like a social worker who you might be able to get on your side in all this? Perhaps the psychiatrist or psychotherapist could help you with a referral of some sort?

In the meantime, is this court date for the CHINS to bust her for being truant? I just can't imagine how that would solve anything! I would certainly take those letters to the court date!

For some reason, I keep thinking about my former co-worker who had a heck of a time getting services for her daughter who was struggling. She ended up moving her daughter to a different school where they wrote an IEP and provided all sorts of services and her daughter just did so much better. I do not know what your options are, but you will need a school that will cooperate with you to really help her!

Please keep us updated on the MRI! I hope all goes as well as possible!


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## Chase

Ange, all you can do is use your best judgment when dealing with that has been thrown at you. Hopefully, this MRI will start to give you some answers. If it doesn't, there are still more options, so keep that in mind.


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## Chase

So, I went to the endo today for my followup. I managed to get a hold of my test numbers since going to him. Thought I would throw this chronology out there for your reading enjoyment:

*11/22/2010*
TSH - <.005 (normal range .358 - 3.74)
T3 - 27 (not a typo) (normal range 1.75 - 4.53)
T4 - 4.63 (normal range .76 - 1.46)

*01/06/2011*
TSH - .23 (normal range .34 - 5.60)
T3 - 4.3 (normal range 2.4 - 4.2)
T4 - .68 (normal range .58-1.64)

I go for additional blood work on February 24 and April 20 (I'm putting that in here more for my memory purposes than anything else.) I meet with my surgeon on February 1 to go over when we'll take this puppy out. However, my endo says he feels that May would be a better timeframe because he wants to make sure there's no chance for arrhythmia when they go to do it. May works better for me anyway because there won't be any disruption to the semester, and I can graduate on time and without worry or delay! Hopefully, all that will be set in stone when the consult with the surgeon is done.

Anyway, there are the numbers, forever and historically preserved on the interwebs.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> So, I went to the endo today for my followup. I managed to get a hold of my test numbers since going to him. Thought I would throw this chronology out there for your reading enjoyment:
> 
> *11/22/2010*
> TSH - <.005 (normal range .358 - 3.74)
> T3 - 27 (not a typo) (normal range 1.75 - 4.53)
> T4 - 4.63 (normal range .76 - 1.46)
> 
> *01/06/2011*
> TSH - .23 (normal range .34 - 5.60)
> T3 - 4.3 (normal range 2.4 - 4.2)
> T4 - .68 (normal range .58-1.64)
> 
> I go for additional blood work on February 24 and April 20 (I'm putting that in here more for my memory purposes than anything else.) I meet with my surgeon on February 1 to go over when we'll take this puppy out. However, my endo says he feels that May would be a better timeframe because he wants to make sure there's no chance for arrhythmia when they go to do it. May works better for me anyway because there won't be any disruption to the semester, and I can graduate on time and without worry or delay! Hopefully, all that will be set in stone when the consult with the surgeon is done.
> 
> Anyway, there are the numbers, forever and historicall preserved on the interwebs.


Well; gosh! It look considerably improved and I hope you are in a holding pattern here. May seems like a long way off but I find that the older I get, the faster time travels. Why is that, I wonder? LOL!

Anyway..................how do you feel w/these labs? You may still be a little on the jittery side? Did doc tweak your anti-thyroid med a little bit?


----------



## Chase

Actually, in this past week, I have felt better than I have in years, and I mean that sincerely. There are still some lingering things to handle (hair loss, occasional weakness, anxiety, varying weight, a jitter every now and then), but I am eons better than I was when I first went to the docs with all this. I had another appointment with my GP today to get some pain meds (I'm back on a cane this week for my knee), and she seemed pretty pleased with how things were going.

I have been taken off the propranol completely as of today. My endo had left that decision up to my GP, and she said to give it a whirl and see how I responded without it. We're going to see how that goes for a few days. Worst case is that I have to go back on it. So, even that was a terrific development for me today. Nothing like DROPPING a med because you don't need it, eh? 

As for time, it's finally slowing down a few ticks. I don't know if that speed was due to the memory loss or Graves' or what, but I'm starting to take a moment to breathe and get a handle on things as I go. Every day is the first day of the rest of my life, and I would like to start each of them out as best as I can. That includes taking at least a couple of minutes for myself each day, even if only 5 or so, to do something just for me. That has helped a bunch, too!


----------



## lavender

Your November labs look like my May labs. Glad your levels are going down and that you are feeling better. Hopefully you will continue to feel well on meds until surgery.


----------



## Chase

I have an appointment to get my eyes checked today. (Yes, I'm doing all these things quite in a row because they'll slide if I don't.) The endo said he sees a bit more bulging than before in them. And I'm starting to have a hard time focusing on screens and printed stuff. I'm nearsighted as it is, so I should be able to see everything just fine. In any case, it will be good to bring my eye doc on board so everyone is on the same page. My eyes are my livelihood, and I need to keep the peepers in shape!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Actually, in this past week, I have felt better than I have in years, and I mean that sincerely. There are still some lingering things to handle (hair loss, occasional weakness, anxiety, varying weight, a jitter every now and then), but I am eons better than I was when I first went to the docs with all this. I had another appointment with my GP today to get some pain meds (I'm back on a cane this week for my knee), and she seemed pretty pleased with how things were going.
> 
> I have been taken off the propranol completely as of today. My endo had left that decision up to my GP, and she said to give it a whirl and see how I responded without it. We're going to see how that goes for a few days. Worst case is that I have to go back on it. So, even that was a terrific development for me today. Nothing like DROPPING a med because you don't need it, eh?
> 
> As for time, it's finally slowing down a few ticks. I don't know if that speed was due to the memory loss or Graves' or what, but I'm starting to take a moment to breathe and get a handle on things as I go. Every day is the first day of the rest of my life, and I would like to start each of them out as best as I can. That includes taking at least a couple of minutes for myself each day, even if only 5 or so, to do something just for me. That has helped a bunch, too!


Keeping your cup full is vitally important!!

You may wish to get a ferritin lab test. That can account for hair loss and other symptoms. It seems low ferritin "is" part and parcel of thyroid disease.

Ideally, ferritin should be 50 to 100; that closer to 100,the better.
Ferritin http://www.thewayup.com/newsletters/081504.htm


----------



## Chase

Well, hell's bells - I slipped on the ice on Saturday night. That put me in the ER on Sunday because something is crunching the wrong way in my knee. (Technically speaking, nothing should ever crunch in your knee anyway.) It was entertaining that they were more interested in the Graves' than they were in my joint that was ballooned up and putting me in pain.

Then again, I have to remember that it's rare for them to see a Graves' patient as opposed to hypothyroid types. I did learn this - when you tell them you have it, they're all worried about your cardiac performance and chest pains. I can see where they're coming from, but for cryin' out loud, my knee hurts. Here's how it sort of went:

Me: "My knee is swollen."

Doc: "What happened?"

Me: "I slipped and did a Bambi in a parking lot."

Doc: "Did you fall all the way? Lose consciousness?"

Me: "Nope, nope, and no Nancy Kerrigan high-impact injury, either. But something is crunching that shouldn't. Please fix that."

Doc: "You're not having any chest pains, though, right?"

Me: "The nurse asked me that, too. No, for the last time, I'm not. I promise, honest *****, with whipped cream on top. I'll let you know if I am having chest pains. I have let a doc know before. That's what got me into this mess in the first place. Please take care of my knee."

Doc: "The x-rays were negative."

Me: "WTF? Seriously?"

Doc: "Well, your knee looks like one of those caves with the stalagtites... or is that stalagmites? Which ones are on the ground?"

Me: "Stalagmites."

Doc: "Thanks. I can never keep those straight. Stalagmites. Mites... gotta remember that. Mice are on the ground, and 'mites' and 'mouse' begins with 'M". That'll work. Anyway, your knee looks like hell, and there's no doubt you have advanced degenerative arthritis in there."

Me: "But I already knew that."

Doc: "The best I can tell you is to make an appointment with your GP."

Me: "Go back to my GP? She told me to come to you!"

Doc: "I know it's not the answer you want to hear. Remember, practice the RICE technique until you can get in to see someone. Oh, and we would like to prescribe you a walker."

Me: "When hell freezes over, youngster."

Doc: "You shouldn't be bearing any weight on it at all."

Me: "But I thought you said you can't see anything wrong with it."

Doc: "But that doesn't mean there isn't. Do you mind if I feel your neck?"

Me: "What?"

Doc: "Your neck. We don't see a lot of Graves' cases in here."

Me: "Do I get a discount on my bill?"

Doc: "No, but it would help me in my residency."

Me: "But my knee still hurts."

Doc: "I know. I'm sorry. Can I listen to your thyroid?"

Me: "I thought you were worried about my heart."

Doc: "And your knee, but I'm more interested in your thyroid. May I?"

Me: "What do I get in exchange?"

Doc: "16 Vicodin."

Me: "Done. It rumbles more on the left...."

I'm easy to please when they offer to take away my joint pain. Sad, I know, but true when I injure my knee. And the above story is told with a bit more humor than it actually occurred. However, the irony laced within is totally accurate.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, hell's bells - I slipped on the ice on Saturday night. That put me in the ER on Sunday because something is crunching the wrong way in my knee. (Technically speaking, nothing should ever crunch in your knee anyway.) It was entertaining that they were more interested in the Graves' than they were in my joint that was ballooned up and putting me in pain.
> 
> Then again, I have to remember that it's rare for them to see a Graves' patient as opposed to hypothyroid types. I did learn this - when you tell them you have it, they're all worried about your cardiac performance and chest pains. I can see where they're coming from, but for cryin' out loud, my knee hurts. Here's how it sort of went:
> 
> Me: "My knee is swollen."
> 
> Doc: "What happened?"
> 
> Me: "I slipped and did a Bambi in a parking lot."
> 
> Doc: "Did you fall all the way? Lose consciousness?"
> 
> Me: "Nope, nope, and no Nancy Kerrigan high-impact injury, either. But something is crunching that shouldn't. Please fix that."
> 
> Doc: "You're not having any chest pains, though, right?"
> 
> Me: "The nurse asked me that, too. No, for the last time, I'm not. I promise, honest *****, with whipped cream on top. I'll let you know if I am having chest pains. I have let a doc know before. That's what got me into this mess in the first place. Please take care of my knee."
> 
> Doc: "The x-rays were negative."
> 
> Me: "WTF? Seriously?"
> 
> Doc: "Well, your knee looks like one of those caves with the stalagtites... or is that stalagmites? Which ones are on the ground?"
> 
> Me: "Stalagmites."
> 
> Doc: "Thanks. I can never keep those straight. Stalagmites. Mites... gotta remember that. Mice are on the ground, and 'mites' and 'mouse' begins with 'M". That'll work. Anyway, your knee looks like hell, and there's no doubt you have advanced degenerative arthritis in there."
> 
> Me: "But I already knew that."
> 
> Doc: "The best I can tell you is to make an appointment with your GP."
> 
> Me: "Go back to my GP? She told me to come to you!"
> 
> Doc: "I know it's not the answer you want to hear. Remember, practice the RICE technique until you can get in to see someone. Oh, and we would like to prescribe you a walker."
> 
> Me: "When hell freezes over, youngster."
> 
> Doc: "You shouldn't be bearing any weight on it at all."
> 
> Me: "But I thought you said you can't see anything wrong with it."
> 
> Doc: "But that doesn't mean there isn't. Do you mind if I feel your neck?"
> 
> Me: "What?"
> 
> Doc: "Your neck. We don't see a lot of Graves' cases in here."
> 
> Me: "Do I get a discount on my bill?"
> 
> Doc: "No, but it would help me in my residency."
> 
> Me: "But my knee still hurts."
> 
> Doc: "I know. I'm sorry. Can I listen to your thyroid?"
> 
> Me: "I thought you were worried about my heart."
> 
> Doc: "And your knee, but I'm more interested in your thyroid. May I?"
> 
> Me: "What do I get in exchange?"
> 
> Doc: "16 Vicodin."
> 
> Me: "Done. It rumbles more on the left...."
> 
> I'm easy to please when they offer to take away my joint pain. Sad, I know, but true when I injure my knee. And the above story is told with a bit more humor than it actually occurred. However, the irony laced within is totally accurate.


Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaw; you poor dear!! What is going to happen now with the knee? Maybe you need to see an ortho guy/gal???

Is it still crunching? If so, I don't think the RICE technique and Vicoden are sufficient. You may have a bone chip. Tch!!

I am so so sorry this happened. Sending prayers and healing thoughts.

{{{{Chase}}}}


----------



## Chase

Eh, it's not the first rodeo with my knees, but I'll still take the hugs.  I have a call into my ortho, but I'm not fond of the man. He complains about putting cortisone shots into my knees, and I complain that he won't do a replacement because of my age. It's a no-win situation where neither of us is happy. I suspect, however, that I have the rougher end of the stick in all this.

Alas, I haven't been to him since last July. I'll see if he'll do the injections with the new x-rays of my knee. He's in one of those factory groups that see 400 people a day but is one of the best ortho clinics in the nation.

So, I'll bide my time to get a replacement until I'm 60 or dead. In the meantime, the x-rays didn't show any bone chips, just massive osteophytes (another term I just love, right along with thyroid storm). I'm not a happy camper when it comes to treatment of my knees. However, it's truly one of those things I can do nothing about for a while.

I just thought it was funny as hell the ER people wanted to monkey around with my thyroid instead of the real reason I was there!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Eh, it's not the first rodeo with my knees, but I'll still take the hugs.  I have a call into my ortho, but I'm not fond of the man. He complains about putting cortisone shots into my knees, and I complain that he won't do a replacement because of my age. It's a no-win situation where neither of us is happy. I suspect, however, that I have the rougher end of the stick in all this.
> 
> Alas, I haven't been to him since last July. I'll see if he'll do the injections with the new x-rays of my knee. He's in one of those factory groups that see 400 people a day but is one of the best ortho clinics in the nation.
> 
> So, I'll bide my time to get a replacement until I'm 60 or dead. In the meantime, the x-rays didn't show any bone chips, just massive osteophytes (another term I just love, right along with thyroid storm). I'm not a happy camper when it comes to treatment of my knees. However, it's truly one of those things I can do nothing about for a while.
> 
> I just thought it was funny as hell the ER people wanted to monkey around with my thyroid instead of the real reason I was there!


I also found that quite amusing but I thought it better to firstly send you much needed hugs and commiseration.

Your writing is precious. I always appreciate your humor. And humor in fact does save us; it lifts the spirits in the face of adversity.


----------



## Chase

So, I went to the ortho doc this morning, who promptly gave me zero relief from what is going on in my knee. I hadn't been back to them since November 2009, so I'm sure he assumed that I was just honky dory. Well, I'm not today. In fact, I hurt worse today than I did on Sunday. He wants to put me in PT for my knee. No one seems to give a damn about the OA that's going on in it that debilitates me daily. I made the mistake of asking for a gimp sticker for my truck, to which he replied he hadn't made a diagnosis yet, so he couldn't give me one to help me get around the university a little easier.

Seriously? I have degenerative arthritis. Exactly what do I have to do to get someone to hand me even a band aid to help my knees? All I'm asking for is a helping hand.

And then I felt a panic attack coming on which is actually still in progress, because I got to the U. and had to park a million miles away and walk on a cane into class almost a 1/2 hour late. Then, I had to walk that million miles back around all the hoodlums who get a free university edumacation without having to work even an hour and a half for it who can't figure out that standing in the middle of the hallway or a doorway is not only rude but stupid and detrimental to people on the move. It's just no fun trying to weave around stupid people.

All of this chaos has put me back at work over 45 minutes late, and I'm still supposed to use a walker. I even told the doc that I can't afford to put a spotlight on myself any more than I have with the Graves'. It took me saying it twice for him to get it.

Brilliant people getting paid large sums of money to do nothing for me.

And so, I agreed to crutches and some PT because what else can I do? This is going to be another case of Chase Heal Thy Self, as it has been for a long time. Tonight, after night school, I'm going to go home and bomb my brain and knee on painkillers and turn off the phone for a while. Right now, I feel like crawling into the paper box under my desk and pulling the lid over myself, but barricading oneself before lunch is unprofessional in many ways.

Or, maybe I would like to run from the building, except I can't run and I can barely walk. So, that leaves me to sit here at my desk and try to look productive while my insides are doing a marathon.

God, I love having Graves' some days...


----------



## Chase

For the record, the aforementioned anxiety attack has finally subsided. It took almost three and a half hours, but all is calm now.

Haven't had one of these in a few weeks. Today was a particularly bad one.

Regardless, I stand by my hoodlum-standing-in-the-doorway/walkway comment...


----------



## lavender

Oh, You sound really frustrated! I have had those days, and I want to tell you that it will get better. On top of the physical disease of Graves, and your knee problems, Graves can cause a lot of mental symptoms like irritability. I had to remember that and that at times it was the Graves talking.

I wanted to point out that when I was really hyperthyroid, all my pain receptors were on overload. There was a point when it felt like all my clothes literally shrunk overnight, and I literally had welts on my skin from some of my clothes (I was loosing weight). There were nights when my sheets felt painful on top of me. All my fibromyalgia pain was heightened, and I felt crippled. I could not make it up a flight of stairs. I feel very lucky to be attending a small seminary for my graduate work. I looked into the big university and could not imagine trying to get around that campus in my post-surgery state.

I do not mean to say that nothing is wrong with your knee, but your pain may be heightened by the Graves. Perhaps if you talk to your endo or primary care doc, they may be able to help you out with the handicapped sticker. I know my endo treated my thyroid, while my PCP filled out all my disability paperwork for my job. She knew me and my history better and knew I was not capable of doing my job, while he seemed to think I ought to be just hunky-dorey.

Beyond that, if the PT is not helpful, you may want to consider another doc.

This will get better. Today, I had so much energy that I was making laps around my school building during my class break. A month ago, I was whining about not having the energy to do my dishes.

Hugs


----------



## Chase

Thanks, Lavender. It was frustrating after everything had subsided because I really had been feeling good. But since I have been backed off the methimazole by 10mg a day, I have started to feel progressively worse emotionally, although I seem to be losing a few pounds again (I will NEVER complain about that).

I actually said out loud to myself in my truck when I got back to work, "This is the Graves' doing this to you." And I knew it was true. The only way to describe it is a chemical thing. Much like when you have a glass of wine or something that makes you sleepy, I can feel a change in my body when one of these anxiety attacks starts. And when it is done, I feel different. It's such a unique feeling that you know when it's happening. It's not like just being upset about something. It's actually being ballistic inside and yet wanting to curl up and hide - the fight or flight concept personified.

But this morning, I opened my eyes and started another day. I tend think starting the day alive is a good thing. Yesterday is done, and I get to start all over today. I'm going at it like I do every day, that the day is what I make it. If there are bumps along the way, then I may just be able to deal with them. Or I might not. It is what it is.

As for the docs, I'm going to take your advice and talk to my GP and see what she says. The worst she'll say is no, and I'll be no worse off than I am right now. Also, I'm considering getting a second opinion about my knee. I think I have been entered as a cog in the wheel at the place I go now. So, yet another piece of good advice!

Okay, I need to get my head into work as much as I can today. Thanks for the encouragement, Lavender. It was just one of those days, y'know?

Oh, if only I had this common sense yesterday!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> For the record, the aforementioned anxiety attack has finally subsided. It took almost three and a half hours, but all is calm now.
> 
> Haven't had one of these in a few weeks. Today was a particularly bad one.
> 
> Regardless, I stand by my hoodlum-standing-in-the-doorway/walkway comment...


I can appreciate what you are experiencing. When I would go to a mall or elsewhere's and could not find my vehicle upon leaving, I would have major domo melt downs. Very very scary.

After appropriate treatment for my Graves', all of that did in fact go completely away. Confidence restored. LOL!!


----------



## Chase

Well, see - there's something to look forward to! And I just have to state this for a reader's sake, I have NEVER had meltdowns like I have now. It's just not normal. I try to be as nice to folks as I can, always mindful of how I treat people. It just boggles my mind that a switch can be flipped with just a simple trigger like being frustrated by something that shouldn't really be that frustrating.

This is one part of all this I will NOT miss come May when they yank my thyroid....

CHASE


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, see - there's something to look forward to! And I just have to state this for a reader's sake, I have NEVER had meltdowns like I have now. It's just not normal. I try to be as nice to folks as I can, always mindful of how I treat people. It just boggles my mind that a switch can be flipped with just a simple trigger like being frustrated by something that shouldn't really be that frustrating.
> 
> This is one part of all this I will NOT miss come May when they yank my thyroid....
> 
> CHASE


Our brains are greatly affected for the good or the bad by the metabolic process.

It is scary to see one's self go to hell in a handbasket with a snap of a finger.

But yes, you will recover from this. I can assure you of that. And by the way, I don't have any trouble finding my truck any more either. LOL!! That was part and parcel as well.


----------



## Chase

LOL, I have done that twice at the university. It's not that big a deck, either. Only one entrance on the one floor where I park, but hell if I could remember where I put my four wheels of joy when I got out of class. One of my classmates looked at me and said, "Lose something?"

I felt like saying, "Nope, just doing an inventory of all the cars in this lot for a carjacking project with the Department of Homeland Security Policy Research group on the first floor!"


----------



## BostonGuy

whoops wrong thread


----------



## lavender

My co-worker named my split personality that came out when I was hyper. Before I was diagnosed, I was seriously worried about my mental health. My therapist kept telling me I was fine, and I would look at her thinking, NO, Something is REALLY WRONG here! This is not me, and I don't know why. I expect you will feel better after your surgery. Just give it some time.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> LOL, I have done that twice at the university. It's not that big a deck, either. Only one entrance on the one floor where I park, but hell if I could remember where I put my four wheels of joy when I got out of class. One of my classmates looked at me and said, "Lose something?"
> 
> I felt like saying, "Nope, just doing an inventory of all the cars in this lot for a carjacking project with the Department of Homeland Security Policy Research group on the first floor!"


ROLF!! You "are" truly a funny bunny!! I am sure you are putting a smile on everyone's face here on the board.

How is the knee doing?


----------



## Chase

Well, I head back for my second counseling session tomorrow morning. I'm sure this past week will come up. It's been kind of crappy all around, and I'm just glad it's over. I need a weekend where I can work my internship and catch up on everything I need.

I actually turned in my application for graduation today. Yay! In 13 weeks, I will be walking the stage to get my diploma! So, that's a good thing for today I can count before I go to sleep!


----------



## lavender

Congratulations! What an accomplishment!

I know counseling has been a huge help to me through all of this. Glad you're seeing someone.


----------



## Chase

Ah, but to make tonight fun, this is my late shift, where I work 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. instead of my normal 6 - 4. And wouldn't you know it? I forgot to bring my meds with me.

Duh.

I am ready to burst into flames.... Have an hour and one very long drive in the snow to get home before I get them! Not my first time forgetting them, and probably won't be my last. But still - duh.


----------



## lavender

can you go get them on a break?


----------



## Chase

Nooo, I'm in the 24x7 operations group during that shift. There's no going anywhere. Besides, at the point I wrote that last message, it was already 10 p.m. Of course, it took me almost an hour to drive home in the snow.

One of these days, I'll get my act together.


----------



## lavender

I do hope you are feeling better today. Do you have a purse or bag that you always take to work? Perhaps you could put a separate bottle of meds in it so you have some at home and on hand when you need them.

It took me over two hours to drive home from school yesterday. Normally, it takes 30 minutes! The snow is beautiful, but it's so hard to live with!


----------



## GD Women

I always carry a few extra of all my medication with me for just in case - never know what can happen. However, carry them in their prescription bottle. Here in Calif it is illegal to carry prescription medication out of their bottle. I almost learned the hard way from a police detective.


----------



## lavender

Thanks for the heads up GD Woman! I just carry all my supplements in a small container that stays in my pocket. Now my only prescription med is my thyroid replacement that I take first thing in the morning so I don't have to worry about carrying any prescription meds around right now, but I certainly have in the past. Now I will have to check to see what the laws are in Ohio.


----------



## Chase

Yeah, Ohio is big on carrying them in their script bottles, too. That's why I hedge on taking a supply with me in unmarked containers. Add in the fact that my job requires security checks every six months, and you can understand why I don't want to risk any of that, including keeping a stash in my locker at work. There's nothing that looks worse than umarked pills in a company area. 

I'll just have to remember to bring them with me that day is all. But that's the crux, ain't it? 

I start PT today. Over the weekend, something snapped in my knee again, but this times, it put whatever was out back in place. Now it just hurts, which I can deal with easier than something stuck where it shouldn't be. So, I can walk better even though it hurts. Hard to explain....


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Yeah, Ohio is big on carrying them in their script bottles, too. That's why I hedge on taking a supply with me in unmarked containers. Add in the fact that my job requires security checks every six months, and you can understand why I don't want to risk any of that, including keeping a stash in my locker at work. There's nothing that looks worse than umarked pills in a company area.
> 
> I'll just have to remember to bring them with me that day is all. But that's the crux, ain't it?
> 
> I start PT today. Over the weekend, something snapped in my knee again, but this times, it put whatever was out back in place. Now it just hurts, which I can deal with easier than something stuck where it shouldn't be. So, I can walk better even though it hurts. Hard to explain....


Glad to hear you are starting your PT today and I hope it goes well for you! Strange about that snapping stuff. I have had that happen w/ the ACL and then it is much much better. Hmmmmmmmm!


----------



## lavender

Well, there's just one more law I've broken! If you get a refill of the exact same dose, you could split the pills between the bottles since I'm sure it's illegal to keep some in an unmarked bottle at home.


----------



## Chase

True, except methimazole comes in the gazillion pill count container that I won't finish until I'm 92.

The other option is to put the majority at home in baggies (why doesn't that image set well either?) and take the rest to work with me in the real bottles.

Meh.

Either way, I just need to remember to bring the stupid things with me!

Oh, and just to reiterate because it's Monday and I haven't complained NEARLY enough today, methimazole is the WORST TASTING MEDICATION I HAVE EVER HAD TO TAKE.

Period.

There. I feel better.


----------



## lavender

Oh boy, you do sound chipper today. Tomorrow's tuesday, it's bound to get better

The giant bottle sounds like a joy. Wonder if the baggies at home are illegal too. LOL.

I only got a month's supply of methimazole at a time. Although I do have tons of synthroid, levothyroxine, and propranolol left. I wish there was a legal way to donate all these pills to someone who needed them. I used to work with the homeless and know how hard they struggled to get meds. In undergrad, I made a sculpture out of left over pills for an art class. My prof really liked it. I bet that was illegal too.


----------



## Chase

Yeah, it's too bad you can't donate stuff back. I'm sure the FDA would frown on that, though. Having had elderly parents, there is definitely a struggle.

Speaking of propranolol, I think I need to call my doc and discuess that. She took me off it, but heart rate has gone up to 96 - 100 again. It's not like I'm struggling all too much, but it's annoying. I'll see what she says.

And the first PT session went okay. I have to learn to use my cane with my opposite hand. Easier said than done, but it's just something I have to do. Okay, time to get a cup of decaf (God is punishing me some days) and hit the workload!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Yeah, it's too bad you can't donate stuff back. I'm sure the FDA would frown on that, though. Having had elderly parents, there is definitely a struggle.
> 
> Speaking of propranolol, I think I need to call my doc and discuess that. She took me off it, but heart rate has gone up to 96 - 100 again. It's not like I'm struggling all too much, but it's annoying. I'll see what she says.
> 
> And the first PT session went okay. I have to learn to use my cane with my opposite hand. Easier said than done, but it's just something I have to do. Okay, time to get a cup of decaf (God is punishing me some days) and hit the workload!


Glad to hear that PT went good. Gosh, I guess the natural inclination w/ the cane is the improper thing to do? Interesting!


----------



## lavender

I was on propranolol up until the day of my surgery because my heart palpitations never slowed while that pesky thyroid was in my body causing all that havoc!


----------



## Chase

Yeah, the PT said _House_ annoys her because he uses it on the wrong side, too!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Yeah, the PT said _House_ annoys her because he uses it on the wrong side, too!


Hmmmmmmmmmmm! Can she e-mail the guy on House?


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## lavender

I had no idea there was a right and wrong side for a cane. Is it the side where the injury is or the other side?


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## Chase

The side opposite the injury is the correct side. Now, getting myself to flip to my left hand is easier said than done, just lemme say that!


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## AZgirl

IM SORRY, BUT I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO START A NEW THREAD.... SO I PICKED A PLACE TO ASK A FEW QUESTIONS.....i do not have that "add a thread" tab that i keep reading about, and cant figure it out!! hope someone sees this....

Ok, i finally got a little educated with hyper, and learned a few things, now im hypo and its like taking me back to kindergarten... can anyone help and tell me if my doc is doing the right thing for me

after 4 months of methimizole, 25 mg total a day and 15 lbs added to my small frame (ouch) i went to doc today and these are my lab results and docs advise... please share your thoughts, i trust you more then her....

Free T4 0.1 out of range from ( 0.8-1.7 ) dec it was 0.9
Free T3 0.8 out of range from ( 2.0-4.8 ) dec it was 2.3
TSH 37.45 out of range from ( 0.45-4.50 ) dec it was .01

SO CLEARLY this explains why im in a GRAVES COMA!!!! So today, she said i can cut back to 5 mgs in am and 5 mgs in pm totally 10 for the day.... and get checked again in 3 weeks.... i left there feeling happy... should i be? I dont have to be back to the gym, i just want to be able to get my head off the couch. Is there any other advise?
I had bunch more labs tested, like sodum, potassium, alcium bilirubin, all those came back IN RANGE. 
Any info would be great, sadly i dont even know if my labs were good news or bad?? my husband called and i told him what doc said, and he said to me, well thats good they have an explaination for you... isnt that good? Ha, nether one of us know it that is or not.... sorry, way out of my comfort zone with this new stuff...
thanks all for any help
julie
ps. does anyone know since i have dropped med mg's, how soon the high dosage will leave my systom, i am desperate to get out of this GRAVES COMA...


----------



## lavender

Actually, you are in a hypo thyroid coma. Looking at your labs, no wonder you can't get your head off the couch! I could barely function when my TSH was an 8, let alone 37. you need T3 and T4 for your body to function at all, and you have almost none. That is why you feel so bad.

It seems like you have been way overmedicated with the methimazole. Was your doc checking your levels at all over the past 4 months since you started it? If not, that is a scary doctor. Not acceptable care at all IMHO. When I started methimazole, my doc was monitoring my labs every couple of weeks, at the most, monthly.

It sounds like they checked your liver levels as well which is standard while on anti-thyroid meds since they can affect the liver. Also, being hyper can elevate liver levels. So, the fact that your levels are in range is good news for your liver.

It also says that the half-life of methimazole is 4-6 hours, meaning that only half the drug is still active in your body 4-6 hours after you take it. I imagine it will wear off gradually over the next couple of days. I am not sure how long it takes the thyroid to start working again once the drug wears off, and that is what you need. Your thyroid needs to start producing thyroid hormones for you to start getting some energy back.

I am posting a link, but I will highlight what is important since I know you are not feeling well. 
"patients on ATDs should be monitored closely every 2 to 4 weeks"
http://www.ithyroid.com/graves_treatments.htm

This means you should be getting lab work ever 2-4 weeks. Especially now. Since your doc so drastically changed your dose, you may have a sudden rebound and go back into hyper thyroid if your labs are not being monitored and dose being adjusted. Flip flopping back and forth is not easy on your body.


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## lavender

I just wanted to let you know that if you go to one of the message boards, Graves Disease for example, and scroll down past all the thread titles, you should see a button for starting a new thread at the bottom left. I hope that helps.


----------



## Andros

AZgirl said:


> IM SORRY, BUT I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO START A NEW THREAD.... SO I PICKED A PLACE TO ASK A FEW QUESTIONS.....i do not have that "add a thread" tab that i keep reading about, and cant figure it out!! hope someone sees this....
> 
> Ok, i finally got a little educated with hyper, and learned a few things, now im hypo and its like taking me back to kindergarten... can anyone help and tell me if my doc is doing the right thing for me
> 
> after 4 months of methimizole, 25 mg total a day and 15 lbs added to my small frame (ouch) i went to doc today and these are my lab results and docs advise... please share your thoughts, i trust you more then her....
> 
> Free T4 0.1 out of range from ( 0.8-1.7 ) dec it was 0.9
> Free T3 0.8 out of range from ( 2.0-4.8 ) dec it was 2.3
> TSH 37.45 out of range from ( 0.45-4.50 ) dec it was .01
> 
> SO CLEARLY this explains why im in a GRAVES COMA!!!! So today, she said i can cut back to 5 mgs in am and 5 mgs in pm totally 10 for the day.... and get checked again in 3 weeks.... i left there feeling happy... should i be? I dont have to be back to the gym, i just want to be able to get my head off the couch. Is there any other advise?
> I had bunch more labs tested, like sodum, potassium, alcium bilirubin, all those came back IN RANGE.
> Any info would be great, sadly i dont even know if my labs were good news or bad?? my husband called and i told him what doc said, and he said to me, well thats good they have an explaination for you... isnt that good? Ha, nether one of us know it that is or not.... sorry, way out of my comfort zone with this new stuff...
> thanks all for any help
> julie
> ps. does anyone know since i have dropped med mg's, how soon the high dosage will leave my systom, i am desperate to get out of this GRAVES COMA...


What has this doctor done to you? You are incredibly hypothyroid. I am surprised you could type your post!

Methimazole has a half-life of only a few hours actually. 5 to 6 hours. Look on the right hand side for pharmacokinetics.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Methimazole

This is not good; please take time to read about the {adverse effects.}


----------



## AZgirl

Thank you both so much for a quick reply! As of today, i am already feeling much much better......I wrote in a few months back (stating i was a weight trainer, sick about weight gain, yada yada) but i also am the one who wrote about my endo putting me initially on 40 mgs a day!! I MYSELF, with reading and not knowing anything about graves, desided upon MYSELF, that was way to high for me. So, honestly, it was me that put me on 25 mgs really! In the meantime, i searched for a new doc. Got one, and with that, extra time passed on. There was a month gap between old doc and new one. When i saw new doc in december (labs also stated above) she told me to stay on that dosage for the one more month to try and up my TSH levels. Inwhich they did as you can see,,,,,over the top! I am taking 5mgs in am and 5 mgs in pm. and she wants me to do labs again in 3 weeks, without seeing her, just a phone call we can check from there. So in all honesty, i cant blame it on my new endo, because a few weeks it took to switch to get her in between. But, thank God, i changed my amount on my own! or i would be comotose (spelling?) I really just wanted confirmation that im at least heading in the right direction with this now from people who actually HAVE graves instead of reading from a text book.. I do want to say though, Doc. is very sweet to me, and is willing to help me to "try" the go to remission way first. And isnt shoving RAI so fast on me, even if that is the way i end up going at the end. However, could this be why im having a daily headache now? not a real severe one, but none the less, an added pain that i dont need? Why did God give me HYPER,sweating like a dog, in the summer here in AZ when its 117 degrees out and im dying, and now that its winter and cold, im HYPO, and freezing? But gaining 15 lbs in a month and halfs time is killin me like im sure would with anyone, but i am a very clean eater, and i was the one helping friends how to achieve their weight goals, and how to start exersize... And one thing that drives me crazy is when people say to me "ahh you can afford it, your still small!" im sorry but i worked very hard to get where i was in my shape, went from riding bike 6 days a week at 30 miles each time, to NOTHING. I feel like telling them "you worked your whole life at your career, ahhh you can afford to take a cut in pay, you make a lot of money"... im sorry to vent about that, but no one understands,although i guess they are trying to make me feel better, im more concerned about my muscle mass that i have lost, then the weight gain,and the fact that i cant even pick my head up to even attempt to get some back! You people seem so kind on here, that i just wanna destress, because im sure you all have your "they dont understand" stories too. Im not normally that miserable, at all. speaking of misery, haha, can this hypo stage make me this bad with mood swings? Cuz if it does, please please please say a prayer for my kids for the next few weeks,,,they are teenagers!  So if im not close to this blog page, they are ganna get it  So, do you guys agree that 10 mgs for next few weeks is good until next lab, or should i beg for less now?


----------



## AZgirl

Lav, thanks for helping me find new threads! i finally found it, after 4 months of looking! haha and to both of you, thanks for the links. I was thrilled to find out about the half life info. Also for future meds. And for the other link, it was pretty clear cut info.


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## lavender

I can totally relate, so vent away. I was hyper and had my AC set at 65 all summer when I normally barely turn it on. Hypo hit just in time for winter, my heat is at 75, and I am still cold. I keep searching for a draft that I know is not there because I spear I can feel it. I just keep checking the windows every day to see if one has mysteriously opened up.

I am glad you like your new doc and that this was a result in changing from the scary doc, not from your new doc's negligence.

The old scary doc should have known it would take a month for your TSH to raise and that you would become hypo in the meantime! Glad you're not seeing him anymore!


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## Chase

Well, I go to the surgeon for the first time tomorow. Looks like things will happen after school lets out in May, which means no disruptions and I can graduate on time. In fact, I would be all for doing it the Monday after graduation so that I am well enough for festival season (band stuff).

Anyway, I have heard nothing but good stuff about this surgeon from my docs and my aunt who is a nurse. So, that gives me another piece of confidence. I'm just hoping the plan doesn't change due to the size of my thyroid. It's getting more uncomfortable by the day.

Speaking of that, has anyone ever had the experience where it feels like it swells and then goes down?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I go to the surgeon for the first time tomorow. Looks like things will happen after school lets out in May, which means no disruptions and I can graduate on time. In fact, I would be all for doing it the Monday after graduation so that I am well enough for festival season (band stuff).
> 
> Anyway, I have heard nothing but good stuff about this surgeon from my docs and my aunt who is a nurse. So, that gives me another piece of confidence. I'm just hoping the plan doesn't change due to the size of my thyroid. It's getting more uncomfortable by the day.
> 
> Speaking of that, has anyone ever had the experience where it feels like it swells and then goes down?


Oh, yes...................that nasty ol' gland is like a balloon. Up and down depending.

Hope they will give you Lugol's solution so you don't dump. Sounds like your gland may be very vascular. Lugol's would also limit the amount of bleeding.

Has your doc mentioned this? Or is this your first visit w/ the surgeon?


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## Chase

Whew. Yet another moment I thought I was losing my mind quelled...

This will be my first visit with the surgeon. I do know there's a vascular issue going on in there because of the ultrasound. According to my endo, he said a normal perfusion is about 20%. Mine is at about 70%. He explained that there are a lot of blood vessels growing in my thyroid.

Or something like that. We didn't discuss it long enough for me to understand it to the Nth degree, but he did show me the ultrasound scan thingy that had a lot of bright pretty colors on it that apparently indicated what he was saying. It looked like a scene from Roller Coaster Tycoon (for those simple gamers out there). Lots of blue, red, and white ballons. It kinda feels like this from time to time -->> explode Explode and back to normal. Or is it like this? -->> :a1Thyroid:

I feel like this thing is playing footsie with my gag reflex some days. The pressure builds and subsides. Laying on my back is so completely out of the question anymore. Not that I traditionally slept on my back, but you always want more what you can't have.

Alas, there is still light at the end of the tunnel for me. I see a solution, no matter how far or close down the road it is. All these woes are transient for me. And it will still be a fresh enough scar for Halloween. 

I'll have to do a bit more reading on Lugol's solution. I'm vaguely familiar with it and what it does. I know it has a ton of applications.

Also, I was curious - did anyone have to have a transfusion for their surgery? Not a lot of info out there except to say one might need one.


----------



## Chase

I did find kind of a neat little article that summarizes things quite nicely on a number of fronts. Wish I had seen this earlier!

Medical Management of the Surgical Patient: A Textbook of Perioperative Medicine By Michael F. Lubin, Robert B. Smith, Thomas F. Dodson


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Whew. Yet another moment I thought I was losing my mind quelled...
> 
> This will be my first visit with the surgeon. I do know there's a vascular issue going on in there because of the ultrasound. According to my endo, he said a normal perfusion is about 20%. Mine is at about 70%. He explained that there are a lot of blood vessels growing in my thyroid.
> 
> Or something like that. We didn't discuss it long enough for me to understand it to the Nth degree, but he did show me the ultrasound scan thingy that had a lot of bright pretty colors on it that apparently indicated what he was saying. It looked like a scene from Roller Coaster Tycoon (for those simple gamers out there). Lots of blue, red, and white ballons. It kinda feels like this from time to time -->> explode Explode and back to normal. Or is it like this? -->> :a1Thyroid:
> 
> I feel like this thing is playing footsie with my gag reflex some days. The pressure builds and subsides. Laying on my back is so completely out of the question anymore. Not that I traditionally slept on my back, but you always want more what you can't have.
> 
> Alas, there is still light at the end of the tunnel for me. I see a solution, no matter how far or close down the road it is. All these woes are transient for me. And it will still be a fresh enough scar for Halloween.
> 
> I'll have to do a bit more reading on Lugol's solution. I'm vaguely familiar with it and what it does. I know it has a ton of applications.
> 
> Also, I was curious - did anyone have to have a transfusion for their surgery? Not a lot of info out there except to say one might need one.


Yep; you are indeed a candidate for Lugol's. You will wear your scar proudly.


----------



## Chase

I'm hoping tomorrow goes well and I learn something new about this process other than what I've read or at least how that information pertains to me in particular. It feels kind of premature to see a surgeon three months ahead of time, but I guess it's better to be prepared with your surgeon than to do it last-minute. I have no idea if my meds will change tomorrow (I doubt it), but it feels good to take any step forward right now. There's still a lot of hurry-up-and-wait to go, but it's still progressing. Can't complain at all about that.


----------



## Chase

Well, I officially have my date of liberation from my wiley thyroid - May 16. I was willing to do it two days after graduation, but the surgeon I met with today said I should take a week to savor my diploma. 

A week prior to the surgery, I'll go in for some testing at the hospital (blood draw and something else), and seven days later, I go back for an estimated 2-hour surgery and all will be on the road to wellness!

All I have to do between now and then is keep euthyroid (there's that word, Andros!). She gave the heads up about a thyroid storm occurring during surgery and that it would be in my best interest to avoid one of those from happening. I couldn't agree more!

Oh, and my doc willingly supplied this information - she's done over a thousand thyroidectomies in her career. So, I'm guessing she knows how to do this by now! I have been very lucky in the docs I have during this process, and I was very comfortable with this doc. So, I think all is going to be just fine.


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## lavender

Glad you found a god surgeon and that you have a date set. Yes, I agree, you should savor that diploma!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I officially have my date of liberation from my wiley thyroid - May 16. I was willing to do it two days after graduation, but the surgeon I met with today said I should take a week to savor my diploma.
> 
> A week prior to the surgery, I'll go in for some testing at the hospital (blood draw and something else), and seven days later, I go back for an estimated 2-hour surgery and all will be on the road to wellness!
> 
> All I have to do between now and then is keep euthyroid (there's that word, Andros!). She gave the heads up about a thyroid storm occurring during surgery and that it would be in my best interest to avoid one of those from happening. I couldn't agree more!
> 
> Oh, and my doc willingly supplied this information - she's done over a thousand thyroidectomies in her career. So, I'm guessing she knows how to do this by now! I have been very lucky in the docs I have during this process, and I was very comfortable with this doc. So, I think all is going to be just fine.


Whoa!!!! You have found an awesome surgeon. Good for you and yes, you need time to savor!! Ha, ha!! I agree w/that.

This is wonderful; truly wonderful. I know that will lift your spirits considerably just knowing what lies ahead.


----------



## Chase

I'm still thinking of changing the date to May 9. I kind of want to think of it as a graduation gift to myself.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I'm still thinking of changing the date to May 9. I kind of want to think of it as a graduation gift to myself.


Go for it. LOL!! You are the only one that knows what would make you the happiest. Take care of your inner self.


----------



## Chase

Well, actually, now that I think about it - I'm going to keep it where it is. That will prevent out-of-town siblings from investing too much time in one event or another. Things occur for a reason, I guess!


----------



## Chase

So, I've been thinking about this surgery and how thrilled I am that it's finally scheduled. There is only one lingering, irrational thought in my head - what if I wake up during it?

I have had a ton of surgeries before, and that has never been an issue. I think what has this worming through my brain right now is that insomnia is so bad sometimes with Graves. My logical mind says that they would know the minute I would start to come out of it because they'll have my neck flayed wide open. However, it's just a thought I can't shake. It's been in the back of my mind for some time, but it moved forward now that I have the surgery date set.

I voiced my concern to the surgeon about this, and she assured me she would know long before I woke up and would take care of it because she would see movement in my neck if I were coming out of things. So, at least one of us is confident about it!

Regardless, this puppy is coming out of my neck no matter what. It's been a nice 38-year relationship with it, but it's time for it to go.


----------



## lavender

I was concerned about the same thing myself. I have lots of issues with drugs not working the way they're supposed to in my body, and a long list of allergies that I gave to the hospital during pre-op. My anesthesiologist met with me right before the surgery, which was helpful, and I was very upfront with him about my concerns. Both he and the surgeon assured me I would be out, and I was. I will say that I woke up after surgery pretty immediately as they were wheeling me to the recovery room, and I was wide awake, but I don't remember a thing from the surgery itself.


----------



## Chase

What doesn't help is that you get to the point where you're sucking down Tylenol PM just to go to bed at night. Sure, the hospital has MUCH better stuff than that to gork you out in the OR, but that inability to sleep just resounds so much in the mind sometimes.

I don't want to overthink this, but I'm not sure how to shut my overactive imagination up when it comes to the possibility. It _does_ happen, although so rarely that it's almost negligible or the accounts of which are unreliable, according to medical research articles.

Either that, or I just need to stop reading the damned articles and assume things will be as they will be. There's nothing I'm going to do about it.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> What doesn't help is that you get to the point where you're sucking down Tylenol PM just to go to bed at night. Sure, the hospital has MUCH better stuff than that to gork you out in the OR, but that inability to sleep just resounds so much in the mind sometimes.
> 
> I don't want to overthink this, but I'm not sure how to shut my overactive imagination up when it comes to the possibility. It _does_ happen, although so rarely that it's almost negligible or the accounts of which are unreliable, according to medical research articles.
> 
> Either that, or I just need to stop reading the damned articles and assume things will be as they will be. There's nothing I'm going to do about it.


As mentioned before; it sounds like you have a most wonderful surgeon and I would be confident in that fact that she is not going to let anything happen to you like that.

We all will be sending white light, good karma and thoughts as well as prayers and well wishes for you on your "special" day. You can count on it.


----------



## Chase

With the understanding that it's Monday, I have no desire to continue even trying to function at work today. Been a long weekend that is translating into the first day of the work week. My emotions are just not on board to even keep trying this afternooon...


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> With the understanding that it's Monday, I have no desire to continue even trying to function at work today. Been a long weekend that is translating into the first day of the work week. My emotions are just not on board to even keep trying this afternooon...


Uh, oh....................somebody is down in the dumps!







Did you do too much this weekend and get yourself worn to a frazzle?

Just letting you know that somebody in Georgia (former Buckeye) cares....................a lot!


----------



## Chase

I don't know what it is anymore. I'm having days like this more frequently - where I can't concentrate. I'm sure part of it is the adjustment in my meds, but that doesn't do me much good when I have to get work done. 

And yes, I'm worn to a frazzle about several things. That's probably the catalyst. I do know there's only 1/2 hour left to work today. Then it's off to PT so they can screw with my knee some more.

However, thank you for the hugs. I could use them today!

CHASE

P.S.

The Bucks are still undefeated in basketball!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I don't know what it is anymore. I'm having days like this more frequently - where I can't concentrate. I'm sure part of it is the adjustment in my meds, but that doesn't do me much good when I have to get work done.
> 
> And yes, I'm worn to a frazzle about several things. That's probably the catalyst. I do know there's only 1/2 hour left to work today. Then it's off to PT so they can screw with my knee some more.
> 
> However, thank you for the hugs. I could use them today!
> 
> CHASE
> 
> P.S.
> 
> The Bucks are still undefeated in basketball!


I love basketball and I love the "Bucks!" Whoooooooooooooooohoo!!!

We all know brain-fog; sadly! Wah!! TD sure messes w/ the brain cells!

Your poor knee; how is that coming along?


----------



## Chase

The good news about my knee is that I popped it back into place (quite accidentally). So, now most of it is back in place except one spot, and I'm just dealing with arthritic pain, which is nothing new. It's sore from popping it back in, but a vast improvement.

Unfortunately, this has demonstrated that my remaining meniscus is floating and will probably need to be scoped at some point. I'm thinking that will have to wait until after my May shindig. While I'm still on a cane, my pain level (the crossing your eyes with agony kind) has significantly diminished! I still have to go to PT, but that's okay with me because they put a TENS unit on my knee. Feels damned skippy at the end of a long day!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> The good news about my knee is that I popped it back into place (quite accidentally). So, now most of it is back in place except one spot, and I'm just dealing with arthritic pain, which is nothing new. It's sore from popping it back in, but a vast improvement.
> 
> Unfortunately, this has demonstrated that my remaining meniscus is floating and will probably need to be scoped at some point. I'm thinking that will have to wait until after my May shindig. While I'm still on a cane, my pain level (the crossing your eyes with agony kind) has significantly diminished! I still have to go to PT, but that's okay with me because they put a TENS unit on my knee. Feels damned skippy at the end of a long day!


You know what? That is good news! It is easy to be grateful for such little turns of events in our lives. I am soooooooooooooo glad.

Do you think it would be good to wear a knee support (elastic/rubber?) Maybe you could see what your PT has to say about that.

What are you taking for the arthritis? Anything? Omega III, Omega VI???


----------



## Chase

For the arthritis, I'm on Celebrex, which is a godsend. I wouldn't be able to move otherwise, I don't think. I'm considering a thing call Synvisc, which is a synthetic gel they shoot into your knee that acts like cartilage. That would be good for a couple of years. It requires six injections, and then you start to get active with it. Supposedly, the gel maintains the separation between the bones. We'll see.

I'm not too happy with the knee doc I'm seeing now. I think it's time for a second opinion, but that will have to wait until after May. One crisis at a time, y'know?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> For the arthritis, I'm on Celebrex, which is a godsend. I wouldn't be able to move otherwise, I don't think. I'm considering a thing call Synvisc, which is a synthetic gel they shoot into your knee that acts like cartilage. That would be good for a couple of years. It requires six injections, and then you start to get active with it. Supposedly, the gel maintains the separation between the bones. We'll see.
> 
> I'm not too happy with the knee doc I'm seeing now. I think it's time for a second opinion, but that will have to wait until after May. One crisis at a time, y'know?


I do know. Like you, I prefer to give my full attention to one thing at a time. LOL!!

Doesn't always work that way though.


----------



## Chase

Well, as is usual these days, I decided something spur of the moment. I went to the ortho doc I have been seeing and was about as mad as I have been in a long time by the time I got out of their cattle-herding factory of an office. I was so mad that I went home and called a new ortho doc for a second opinion. I see him on Tuesday.

To back up, this past Sunday, I quite accidentally popped half of my cartilage back where it should be by picking up a bag of bird feed and heading for the door. It was tremendously painful - you could say I was quite verbal when it happened - but it relieved pain on half my knee. The other half still feels like a someone is prying up on my kneecap with a screwdriver. I say this for reference, not for anyone to lose their crumpets but to illustrate that my knee is far from okay.

Three weeks ago, I asked the ortho doc for a temporary gimp hang tag thingy for my truck because I had been hoofing it across campus and was in such pain by the time I got to class (see a few messages ago). He said he would not give me one because, "Well, I haven't made my diagnosis yet."

For the last three weeks, I have hoofed it to class on a cane. Thank you very much.

Yesterday, after waiting for TWO HOURS beyond my appointment time to see him (I kid you not), he comes in and says, "I'm sorry - we're running a little behind today. Now, we issued you a handicapped placard last time, right?"

I about lost it. I have been in eye-crossing pain for three weeks, and he can't even get that straight.

So, he says he'll issue the six month placard order. I tell him that I still have a jammed feeling in my knee (which is my meniscus taking a world tour around my femur), and he gives me all these options they could try but never gives a plan of action. He dodges the whole point, going so far as to tell me I probably have another tear in the meniscus, and out to the hallway we go so he can give me the gimp sticker order.

While he was writing, I said, "I don't want to beg the question, but what about the jammed feeling in my knee?"

"Well," he says, "if it's still like that in a month, give us a call."

SERIOUSLY?

I know I have bad knees, but that's it? It was then I realized the entire transaction with this doc I had been waiting two hours to see was less than four minutes. Flat. I'm not kidding. That's when I pretty much stormed out of there, which is uncharacteristic of me to do. (Well, I stormed once I had the placard order in my hot little hands.)

Now, I am very aware that my temper these days is not as controlled as it used to be. Things upset me so much more easily now, and I always have to keep battling to keep my mouth shut and my emotions in check. Graves makes it such a struggle to deal with stressful situations sometimes. And I'm not talking stress like running into a burning building. I'm takling about coping with moments that I could have handled with one half of my verbal skills tied behind my back. I barely made it out of there before I was grumbling to myself. I looked like I needed to be in a padded room. At least I didn't cry, although I was on the verge by the time I got into my truck.

When I got home, I found another doc I had been thinking about seeing originally and gave them a call. He's a one-man practice in a smaller, non-cattle-driving office. If he tells me the same thing, then it will be something I'll have to accept, which will be fine. I'll fix things myself by manipulating the knee and hopefully popping back in what is out of joint. Then, I'll wait until my knee finally crumbles. Then maybe they'll do a replacement. And in the meantime, I'll sit on my butt in my recliner and eat Cheetos because it's too painful to walk for any kind of distance.

Okay, I have all that out of my system. Today is a new day, and Tuesday will maybe be the answer I have been looking for with this new knee doc. In the meantime, I don't have to walk as far to get to class, which will help. It will also help get me out of my continuously whiny mood every day I set foot on that campus after parking. And perhaps I won't be so whiny on here about it anymore.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, as is usual these days, I decided something spur of the moment. I went to the ortho doc I have been seeing and was about as mad as I have been in a long time by the time I got out of their cattle-herding factory of an office. I was so mad that I went home and called a new ortho doc for a second opinion. I see him on Tuesday.
> 
> To back up, this past Sunday, I quite accidentally popped half of my cartilage back where it should be by picking up a bag of bird feed and heading for the door. It was tremendously painful - you could say I was quite verbal when it happened - but it relieved pain on half my knee. The other half still feels like a someone is prying up on my kneecap with a screwdriver. I say this for reference, not for anyone to lose their crumpets but to illustrate that my knee is far from okay.
> 
> Three weeks ago, I asked the ortho doc for a temporary gimp hang tag thingy for my truck because I had been hoofing it across campus and was in such pain by the time I got to class (see a few messages ago). He said he would not give me one because, "Well, I haven't made my diagnosis yet."
> 
> For the last three weeks, I have hoofed it to class on a cane. Thank you very much.
> 
> Yesterday, after waiting for TWO HOURS beyond my appointment time to see him (I kid you not), he comes in and says, "I'm sorry - we're running a little behind today. Now, we issued you a handicapped placard last time, right?"
> 
> I about lost it. I have been in eye-crossing pain for three weeks, and he can't even get that straight.
> 
> So, he says he'll issue the six month placard order. I tell him that I still have a jammed feeling in my knee (which is my meniscus taking a world tour around my femur), and he gives me all these options they could try but never gives a plan of action. He dodges the whole point, going so far as to tell me I probably have another tear in the meniscus, and out to the hallway we go so he can give me the gimp sticker order.
> 
> While he was writing, I said, "I don't want to beg the question, but what about the jammed feeling in my knee?"
> 
> "Well," he says, "if it's still like that in a month, give us a call."
> 
> SERIOUSLY?
> 
> I know I have bad knees, but that's it? It was then I realized the entire transaction with this doc I had been waiting two hours to see was less than four minutes. Flat. I'm not kidding. That's when I pretty much stormed out of there, which is uncharacteristic of me to do. (Well, I stormed once I had the placard order in my hot little hands.)
> 
> Now, I am very aware that my temper these days is not as controlled as it used to be. Things upset me so much more easily now, and I always have to keep battling to keep my mouth shut and my emotions in check. Graves makes it such a struggle to deal with stressful situations sometimes. And I'm not talking stress like running into a burning building. I'm takling about coping with moments that I could have handled with one half of my verbal skills tied behind my back. I barely made it out of there before I was grumbling to myself. I looked like I needed to be in a padded room. At least I didn't cry, although I was on the verge by the time I got into my truck.
> 
> When I got home, I found another doc I had been thinking about seeing originally and gave them a call. He's a one-man practice in a smaller, non-cattle-driving office. If he tells me the same thing, then it will be something I'll have to accept, which will be fine. I'll fix things myself by manipulating the knee and hopefully popping back in what is out of joint. Then, I'll wait until my knee finally crumbles. Then maybe they'll do a replacement. And in the meantime, I'll sit on my butt in my recliner and Cheetos because it's too painful to walk for any kind of distance.
> 
> Okay, I have all that out of my system. Today is a new day, and Tuesday will maybe be the answer I have been looking for with this new knee doc. In the meantime, I don't have to walk as far to get to class, which will help. It will also help get me out of my continuously whiny mood every day I set foot on that campus after parking. And perhaps I won't be so whiny on here about it anymore.


Unbelievable!!! That dirty............................. I can't say it here. You poor thing having to cross campus gimping along and no handicapped sticker to make life easier for you. Finally someone who "needs" the sticker does not get it whereas those who don't, have them! Go figure that one out!

When is your appt. w/ the new doc? I am so glad you have done this.

What irks me more than anything is that you have to pay this doctor that you have been going to. This sort of thing just tears my guts out. He sounds like a sadist.

{{{{Chase}}}} I hope today is a much better day for you pain wise and other wise.


----------



## Chase

Looking back, I now realize how long-winded that post was. On the other hand, you did say that you wanted to see what happened on this journey. These are the kinds of things I could have negotiated really well about two years ago. Now, they're monumental and almost impossible to handle in the moment when they are occurring and take some explaining. It's hard to keep emotions under control.

I can't help but wonder if this will get better after the infamous thyroidectomy, or will it be like this from here on out? Physical things I can deal with. Emotional things just suck in general for me anymore. I'm not borrowing trouble with it, but it's something I have to consider moving forward. If it will be with me forever, I need a battle plan, y'know?

And the appointment is set for Tuesday the 15th at 1:30. They are in no way affiliated with the previous doctor group I have been seeing. I made sure of that. 

And the PTs will be happy, I think. Even they said I should get a second opinion. I figure if a PT is saying that, then it's a good thing to do.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Looking back, I now realize how long-winded that post was. On the other hand, you did say that you wanted to see what happened on this journey. These are the kinds of things I could have negotiated really well about two years ago. Now, they're monumental and almost impossible to handle in the moment when they are occurring and take some explaining. It's hard to keep emotions under control.
> 
> I can't help but wonder if this will get better after the infamous thyroidectomy, or will it be like this from here on out? Physical things I can deal with. Emotional things just suck in general for me anymore. I'm not borrowing trouble with it, but it's something I have to consider moving forward. If it will be with me forever, I need a battle plan, y'know?
> 
> And the appointment is set for Tuesday the 15th at 1:30. They are in no way affiliated with the previous doctor group I have been seeing. I made sure of that.
> 
> And the PTs will be happy, I think. Even they said I should get a second opinion. I figure if a PT is saying that, then it's a good thing to do.


I love long-winded posts!!! I am so glad you have the appt. set up already.

YES! Once you get TT and get on the road to healing, this anger will dissipate. I personally promise you that. Once again, you will be in full control of your emotions and actually even better than before because we emerge from this illness far wiser. Emotional maturation! LOL!! It's true!

I simply cannot wait for Tues. to arrive and I hope we get some good news from you and this new doctor. I have a "feeling" that this is a good thing. If PT said that, that is a huge "clue!"


----------



## lavender

Oh, you sound like you are having a rough time! And that knee sounds really painful! Glad you are getting into the other doc.
My anger significantly reduced after my surgery. Emotions were still a bit haywire for a while as I adjusted to thyroid meds. Now since I have been on Armour for 6 weeks now, I am an emotionally stable person again. What a relief! Also, ALL of my physical pain has greatly reduced to much less than it was before my surgery. I thought I was going to have to go for the handicapped thing myself. Life is getting better slowly, and every gain feels like a miracle to me. I know how hard this must be for you right now. You will get there.


----------



## Chase

Well, I went to see this new doc who was a) on time, b) thorough to the point of causing a ton of pain with my knee as he examined it (no pain, no gain), and c) has ordered an MRI to see what's going on inside it. Based on the x-rays, he also gave me the literature to start talking about a partial replacement. (Beats the hell out of a total, in my opinion.)

He's thinking there may be a tear in my ACL, part of which is flopping forward and jamming into my joint. So, the MRI will be scheduled for sometime next week, hopefully, depending on the availability of the facility and my schedule. Then we'll see what's going on for sure.

All this took about 30 minutes to determine, but it sure beats 4 minutes like the last time. Worst case is that he blows it off, but I don't think that's going to happen. I'm supposed to continue physical therapy like I have been, and that helps a lot with the swelling.

For now, I'm no worse off than I was. I just have better prospects of someone maybe fixing what ails me in my knee. First and foremost, I need to get this thyroid out of me. That will get one monkey off my back. Then, maybe the knee will get fixed and give me the other part me a chance to start rolling again. I miss hiking, and it would be pretty super to be able to hit the trails again some day.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I went to see this new doc who was a) on time, b) thorough to the point of causing a ton of pain with my knee as he examined it (no pain, no gain), and c) has ordered an MRI to see what's going on inside it. Based on the x-rays, he also gave me the literature to start talking about a partial replacement. (Beats the hell out of a total, in my opinion.)
> 
> He's thinking there may be a tear in my ACL, part of which is flopping forward and jamming into my joint. So, the MRI will be scheduled for sometime next week, hopefully, depending on the availability of the facility and my schedule. Then we'll see what's going on for sure.
> 
> All this took about 30 minutes to determine, but it sure beats 4 minutes like the last time. Worst case is that he blows it off, but I don't think that's going to happen. I'm supposed to continue physical therapy like I have been, and that helps a lot with the swelling.
> 
> For now, I'm no worse off than I was. I just have better prospects of someone maybe fixing what ails me in my knee. First and foremost, I need to get this thyroid out of me. That will get one monkey off my back. Then, maybe the knee will get fixed and give me the other part me a chance to start rolling again. I miss hiking, and it would be pretty super to be able to hit the trails again some day.


Oh, my gosh!! Am I ever glad to hear such a good report from this new doc. This restores all hope!!!

You will be hiking again. I had several lady friends and gentlemen friends at the gym who had knee replacements and they are doing absolutely great. I am not just saying this. It "is" true!


----------



## lavender

I had a fried who had her knee replaced about a month after my thyroid surgery, and she was out on the dance floor bustin a move Saturday night! Not bad for a 60+ woman with fibormyalgia, lupus and hypothyroid!

You'll get there!

I just need to mention that spring is coming. The geese are everywhere, migrating north again. I heard birds chirping while it was snowing last week. The grass is appearing again. It was in the 50s today, and I was out in the courtyard at school doing laps between classes. It felt sooooo good to be outdoors and moving my body again!


----------



## Chase

Our geese never seem to leave. They just go about finding good places to eat along the senior streets. 

And yes, I do know what you mean about that little break in the weather. I think that's God's way of saying, "Just hang in there a little longer. I know what I'm doing."


----------



## lavender

I read outside for an hour today. Felt sooooo good to get some fresh air. I suspect we are going to have an early spring. Groundhog said so.


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## Chase

Buckeye Chuck said there would be six more weeks. When I left for work this morning at 6:30, it was 64 degrees.

Of course, it's going to get cold again this weekend, but you gotta have your seasons. I like to think of it this way - when it's cold a bit longer, there are fewer bugs in the summer. I can deal with that.

I was thinking of having lunch outside today if it's not raining. I feel like I need sunshine or fresh air or something. Or maybe I just need to get away from my desk during the day. But I'm pretty sure it's the warm weather.


----------



## lavender

Whatever the reason, take advantage of the nice weather while you can!

I never actually saw the news story, just heard it through the grapevine that the groundhog predicted an early spring. Darn. I still see the geese heading north as a good sign.


----------



## Chase

Well, Buckeye Chuck was right - this morning, my truck was LAYERED with snow, ice, snow, ice, and more snow.

Dammit.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, Buckeye Chuck was right - this morning, my truck was LAYERED with snow, ice, snow, ice, and more snow.
> 
> Dammit.


We are headed for a freeze here in Ga. as well. Be careful walking and driving.


----------



## Chase

Walking is the fun part... if you love danger. I have been terrified this winter since falling. I'm starting to feel like a shut-in. 

Alas, my MRI got scheduled for next Thursday. (Good thing I'm not in a hurry, eh?) Hopefully, that will tell them why I feel like I have a screwdriver prying up my kneecap!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Walking is the fun part... if you love danger. I have been terrified this winter since falling. I'm starting to feel like a shut-in.
> 
> Alas, my MRI got scheduled for next Thursday. (Good thing I'm not in a hurry, eh?) Hopefully, that will tell them why I feel like I have a screwdriver prying up my kneecap!


Rescheduled due to snow? Maybe that is for the best though. Sure don't want to hear about falling down again. No,no!


----------



## Chase

No, that's just when they scheduled it. Apparently, I have been hobbling with it this long that it can wait another two weeks. What's a little swelling between months?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> No, that's just when they scheduled it. Apparently, I have been hobbling with it this long that it can wait another two weeks. What's a little swelling between months?


Yeah; they are all heart! I hear you loud and clear!! We pay to be tortured.


----------



## lavender

I had to settle the conflicting groundhog reports I have been hearing.

My friends keep telling my Buckeye Chuck did not see his shadow, but you say he has. So, I had to look it up to find out for myself,

and.....

we are due for an early spring!

Neither Buckeye Chuck nor Punxsutawney Phil saw their shadows this year!

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvg/story?section=news/state&id=7934696

I know it's slushing out today, but spring does not come overnight! The ground is melting, and the snow is not sticking around. I think we have many positive signs of an early spring!


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## Chase

I got news for Chuck... 7 inches of news.... in one day.


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## lavender

The sun is coming out tomorrow! I know there is still some snow ahead, but I can feel the spring right around the bend! I refuse to be defeated by negative thoughts about the weather, even if I am the only person in town living in my delusion of spring!


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## Chase

Actually, I'm always fond of a good strong winter. It helps many things stay in balance when the seasons are balanced.

Normally, I'd be tent camping in snow about now. THAT is an experience. If you're a coffee drinker, that first cup never tasted so good as when you get up before sunrise and it's soooo frosty outside. You trudge through the snow to get to the fire or stove. By the time everyone else is up, you're on your second or third cup of bliss and ready to start the bacon!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Actually, I'm always fond of a good strong winter. It helps many things stay in balance when the seasons are balanced.
> 
> Normally, I'd be tent camping in snow about now. THAT is an experience. If you're a coffee drinker, that first cup never tasted so good as when you get up before sunrise and it's soooo frosty outside. You trudge through the snow to get to the fire or stove. By the time everyone else is up, you're on your second or third cup of bliss and ready to start the bacon!


I am w/you on the camping. You brought back some very fond memories. Ice-skating at night under a full moon, sledding down the steepest hill etc..

Love winter sports and activities.

And coffee!! Gotta' have it! Cowboy coffee!


----------



## Chase

As a scoutmaster, I am part of a troop that are truly city kids, right along with their parents. So, when we go camping, some of the "rustic" nature of it (No, we don't have dishwashers here. Boil the egg off the dutch oven.) can be a shocker, although they are improving in leaps and bounds.

One time, we went to the local Boy Scout reservation to camp in the winter. Overnight, all the water spigots froze solid, and the snow and ice had combined to form a shell on the tents (makes it quite toasty inside the tent, believe it or not). So, we all get up at the crack of dawn, and there's no water to make coffee. So, I tell them to make "snow coffee".

What the hell is snow coffee, they ask. I took the pot off the stove, went over to the field, found snow that had no yellow traces in it  and filled up the pot. Turned on the stove, melted the snow, made coffee! To this day, the parents rave that it was the best coffee they have ever had while camping!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> As a scoutmaster, I am part of a troop that are truly city kids, right along with their parents. So, when we go camping, some of the "rustic" nature of it (No, we don't have dishwashers here. Boil the egg off the dutch oven.) can be a shocker, although they are improving in leaps and bounds.
> 
> One time, we went to the local Boy Scout reservation to camp in the winter. Overnight, all the water spigots froze solid, and the snow and ice had combined to form a shell on the tents (makes it quite toasty inside the tent, believe it or not). So, we all get up at the crack of dawn, and there's no water to make coffee. So, I tell them to make "snow coffee".
> 
> What the hell is snow coffee, they ask. I took the pot off the stove, went over to the field, found snow that had no yellow traces in it  and filled up the pot. Turned on the stove, melted the snow, made coffee! To this day, the parents rave that it was the best coffee they have ever had while camping!


Yep; I have had and made snow coffee!! Where I grew up, right around the corner was Camp Stambaugh. I spent every and I do mean every free moment there.

http://www.bsa-gwrc.org/district/wp/stambaugh/

And yes; I was a Girl Scout, Camp Fire Girl and a 4-H'er!!


----------



## Chase

Wow! That looks like a great camp! I sent the link to our scoutmaster so he can take a look at it. Thanks!

Here's our normal stomping ground: http://www.manatoc.org/year_around_camp/facilities/index.html

We generally tent camp, but I'm pushing for a lodge this year. It's that I have anything against tent camping, but seriously - the reservation is full of cabins we never use!

I think it's time to have a conversation with our SPL...


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Wow! That looks like a great camp! I sent the link to our scoutmaster so he can take a look at it. Thanks!
> 
> Here's our normal stomping ground: http://www.manatoc.org/year_around_camp/facilities/index.html
> 
> We generally tent camp, but I'm pushing for a lodge this year. It's that I have anything against tent camping, but seriously - the reservation is full of cabins we never use!
> 
> I think it's time to have a conversation with our SPL...


Hey; your's kicks some butt too!! How nice to share these memories!!! Love it and thank you!


----------



## Chase

Well, the new blood work results are in:

T3 - 4.5 (2.4 - 4.2)
T4 - .90 (.58 - 1.64)
TSH - .02 (.34 - 5.60)

So, I will now be on 25 mg a day. I started out on 30 mg, dropped to 20 mg. Now walking in between. Guess we'll see if that makes a dent in the April tests. I have started a mental countdown in the waaaay back part of my mind for the surgery date. I have so much on my plate at the moment (my father's probate stuff, final semester of school, internship, work, band, family, bills, people stealing things from my garage, life in general, etc.) that it's not something I'm ready to get into the fore of my mind yet.

I did make one move in preparation for it, though. I started to make out a living will... just in case. I don't anticipate any problems, but who knows? I don't want my family going through what we did with my father. They should know what I want... just in case...

Anyway, there's my update for the moment...

Oh, and my neck feels like it's going to explode these last nine days...

Other than that, still indestructible.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, the new blood work results are in:
> 
> T3 - 4.5 (2.4 - 4.2)
> T4 - .90 (.58 - 1.64)
> TSH - .02 (.34 - 5.60)
> 
> So, I will now be on 25 mg a day. I started out on 30 mg, dropped to 20 mg. Now walking in between. Guess we'll see if that makes a dent in the April tests. I have started a mental countdown in the waaaay back part of my mind for the surgery date. I have so much on my plate at the moment (my father's probate stuff, final semester of school, internship, work, band, family, bills, people stealing things from my garage, life in general, etc.) that it's not something I'm ready to get into the fore of my mind yet.
> 
> I did make one move in preparation for it, though. I started to make out a living will... just in case. I don't anticipate any problems, but who knows? I don't want my family going through what we did with my father. They should know what I want... just in case...
> 
> Anyway, there's my update for the moment...


Good to hear from you!!! Which med are you on; I forgot? Labs don't look too bad, really!

Yeah; bad economy................increased crime. Not a good scenario at all. We are in deep doo doo!

All will be well; keep the faith. And I am keeping you in my prayers for this and much more!


----------



## Chase

I am on methimazole in 10 mg tabs. I figured things were starting to get under control because remember those pounds I lost? I found every damned one of them and 10 of their friends who decided to come along for the ride.

Oh well. Tis what tis. Things could always be worse. I mean, some days, they seem to be, but there are plenty of people in worse boats than I at the moment, no matter how crappy and sometimes unable to function I feel. I can still put a foot on the floor to start the day each morning. It may not be the best foot, but together those feet carry me to work and school.

As long as I can keep these crises lined up and moving forward, things will eventually resolve themselves. The estate, school, thyroid surgery, knee surgery. (The new doc thinks I'm a good candidate for a partial replacement, but Friday will tell what's wrong with my knee besides arthritis.)

And with that, I will now shut down Whine Mode.  But I'll still complain that my thyroid feels like a grapefruit in my throat this past week...


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I am on methimazole in 10 mg tabs. I figured things were starting to get under control because remember those pounds I lost? I found every damned one of them and 10 of their friends who decided to come along for the ride.
> 
> Oh well. Tis what tis. Things could always be worse. I mean, some days, they seem to be, but there are plenty of people in worse boats than I at the moment, no matter how crappy and sometimes unable to function I feel. I can still put a foot on the floor to start the day each morning. It may not be the best foot, but together those feet carry me to work and school.
> 
> As long as I can keep these crises lined up and moving forward, things will eventually resolve themselves. The estate, school, thyroid surgery, knee surgery. (The new doc thinks I'm a good candidate for a partial replacement, but Friday will tell what's wrong with my knee besides arthritis.)
> 
> And with that, I will now shut down Whine Mode.  But I'll still complain that my thyroid feels like a grapefruit in my throat this past week...


Will you please let us know about your knee Friday? I hope the news is better than what you expect to hear.

And that grapefruit? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack. You will be glad to have that out for sure!!

Thank you for refreshing my memory re the Methimazole.


----------



## Chase

The MRI results are in - no ACL tear, which is a very good thing. The cause of the intense pain I have is due to a lack of a meniscus on the left side of my knee. That is causing my patella to shift into an unnatural track because everything is off-kilter. The swelling contributes to all of that, as well.

The prognosis is a four-month recovery. And, as I expected (why I get my hopes up I'll never know), the doc has backed off on the partial replacement option because of my age. I'm resigned to the fact that I'll have one foot in the grave before anyone considers fixing what is wrong with my knee.

So there you have it. Once again, I'm nailing my foot to the floor and trying to run. Priorities, priorities. Need to get the thryoid out first. I know that's a pretty sure bet at this point, especially because the damned thing keeps swelling so bad. It's really putting the push on my airway and gag reflex lately. I can honestly say this is the first aspect of this disease that sucks because there is no fix for it other than to remove it, which is two months away.

What's a Graves girl to do?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> The MRI results are in - no ACL tear, which is a very good thing. The cause of the intense pain I have is due to a lack of a meniscus on the left side of my knee. That is causing my patella to shift into an unnatural track because everything is off-kilter. The swelling contributes to all of that, as well.
> 
> The prognosis is a four-month recovery. And, as I expected (why I get my hopes up I'll never know), the doc has backed off on the partial replacement option because of my age. I'm resigned to the fact that I'll have one foot in the grave before anyone considers fixing what is wrong with my knee.
> 
> So there you have it. Once again, I'm nailing my foot to the floor and trying to run. Priorities, priorities. Need to get the thryoid out first. I know that's a pretty sure bet at this point, especially because the damned thing keeps swelling so bad. It's really putting the push on my airway and gag reflex lately. I can honestly say this is the first aspect of this disease that sucks because there is no fix for it other than to remove it, which is two months away.
> 
> What's a Graves girl to do?


Why pray tell, do you not have a meniscus on the left side? An accident? I am so sorry to hear this.

Like you say though; thyroid first. Prioritize! I do not like that it is obstructing your airway.


----------



## Chase

Weeeeelllllll, in 1996, I was playing raquetball. I was going after a ball that was careening toward the wall. I spotted the big white wall at the last second and pivoted, but only half of me did. My torse went one way, and my knee went the other, tearing my meniscus in half. There was no repairing what had been torn and was floating freely in my knee, so they removed it.

Ah, that's what I get for playing sports!


----------



## Chase

As for the airway, I can deal with it. It's uncomfortable, for sure. But I think it's that I'm noticing it more lately as it swells. This newest swelling has been the most long-lasting. Before, it used to go down after a few days. Right now, I'm going on a few weeks of it doing this.

As long as it's not choking me out, I figure I can last until school is done. Frankly, I need to finish school while I still have the gumption in me to do so. Otherwise, I'll never go back... ever ever ever.


----------



## Chase

Anyone know if a persistent cold is part of Graves'? I have had a cold since January that I just can't seem to ditch. I have no idea whether to bug my GP or my endo about it.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Anyone know if a persistent cold is part of Graves'? I have had a cold since January that I just can't seem to ditch. I have no idea whether to bug my GP or my endo about it.


What exactly are the symptoms of this cold? {{{{Chase}}}}


----------



## Chase

Sneezing (a LOT), runny nose, chills (but only occasionally), fatigue (joints). It feels like I am always on the cusp of a full-blown cold, but it never materializes. It's like day before you get really sick where you feel it coming on, but it never fully manifests.

I don't have allergies. I'm wondering if this is a side-effect of methimazole?


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Sneezing (a LOT), runny nose, chills (but only occasionally), fatigue (joints). It feels like I am always on the cusp of a full-blown cold, but it never materializes. It's like day before you get really sick where you feel it coming on, but it never fully manifests.
> 
> I don't have allergies. I'm wondering if this is a side-effect of methimazole?


You know what; It may be! You don't have a sore throat, do you? Joint pain is listed as an adverse effect but you say fatigue.

Here is what I know. Tapazole is hard on the liver. If your liver is being affected, you can be getting frequent colds and/or unable to shed the one you have as your immune system is severely depressed. This can also cause fatigue (elevated liver enzymes.)

Have you had your liver enzymes checked? And I really do think it would be wise to tell your doctor what you have told us if you have not done so.


----------



## Chase

I just talked to my GP. She's calling in another antibiotic prescription. So, she's aware of what is going on as far as the symptoms. But I hate to say, "Gee, doc - look at what I read on the internet!"

The internet is a dangerous place sometimes...

Nope, I don't currently have a sore throat, other than the swelling in my thyroid which makes everything feel crappy. I have had a sore throat on and off since January. It's just one of those "icky" overall feelings I can't shake.

I just put in a call to my endo just to cover the bases. If he thinks I should do the additional antibiotics, then that's what I'll do. But you're right - I'm probably due for an enzyme check at some point, since it feels like I'm swallowing a small pharmacy every day!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I just talked to my GP. She's calling in another antibiotic prescription. So, she's aware of what is going on as far as the symptoms. But I hate to say, "Gee, doc - look at what I read on the internet!"
> 
> The internet is a dangerous place sometimes...
> 
> Nope, I don't currently have a sore throat, other than the swelling in my thyroid which makes everything feel crappy. I have had a sore throat on and off since January. It's just one of those "icky" overall feelings I can't shake.
> 
> I just put in a call to my endo just to cover the bases. If he thinks I should do the additional antibiotics, then that's what I'll do. But you're right - I'm probably due for an enzyme check at some point, since it feels like I'm swallowing a small pharmacy every day!


Yep; any money the enzymes are elevated. Please let us know. I am the Queen of worry!


----------



## lavender

I was constantly sick before my thyroid was taken out. When Graves was diagnosed, and my liver enzymes were so high, my doc was in the midst for checking me for mono, and I had strep. Things got better initially on the methimazole, but the longer I was on it, the more symptoms returned. My body just did not have the strength to heal with the thyroid in.

When's your surgery? I know you were waiting until after classes, but I can't remember if you were done after spring quarter or not???


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## Chase

May 16 is my day of liberation!! Well, May 7 is graduation, so maybe a double celebration, eh? 

See, this is why I dig these boards - it is a validation that I am not losing my mind. To be able to bounce questions off people who have gone through this is so invaluable, and it gives me a basis to go ask questions or look stuff up regarding what I am feeling. I started keeping a journal a while back of this little journey. I'm sure I'll look back on it some day with amusement. Right now, though, it is a vent for some of the frustrations I have. No one likes to feel crappy, no matter how bright the light at the end of the tunnel is.

I got a voicemail from my endo. He's concerned that I feel like I have a fever and wants to know how high they're getting. Well, first, I'm at work when they hit and don't have a thermometer. Second, they're not high. They're achy annoying, which is my indicator that I have a fever. Has been since childhood. Then, two Motrin later, and it's gone.

Like I said, the only way I can describe it is the day before you go into a full-blown cold. You feel it coming on - sinuses running, chills, fatigue, burning eyes, and an overall crappy feeling. I've been feeling this way on and off since January. Over St. Patrick's Day week, I thought I was going into the full-blown cold (four out of seven musicians in the band were sick), but again, it did not materialize.

Here's the thing - I am so close to the surgery date that I can stick anything out for another month. I have more blood work coming up this month. I'll do whatever I have to in order for the surgery to happen. I need to get this grapefruit (okay, so it's not THAT big) out of my throat.

So close, and yet so far...


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> May 16 is my day of liberation!! Well, May 7 is graduation, so maybe a double celebration, eh?
> 
> See, this is why I dig these boards - it is a validation that I am not losing my mind. To be able to bounce questions off people who have gone through this is so invaluable, and it gives me a basis to go ask questions or look stuff up regarding what I am feeling. I started keeping a journal a while back of this little journey. I'm sure I'll look back on it some day with amusement. Right now, though, it is a vent for some of the frustrations I have. No one likes to feel crappy, no matter how bright the light at the end of the tunnel is.
> 
> I got a voicemail from my endo. He's concerned that I feel like I have a fever and wants to know how high they're getting. Well, first, I'm at work when they hit and don't have a thermometer. Second, they're not high. They're achy annoying, which is my indicator that I have a fever. Has been since childhood. Then, two Motrin later, and it's gone.
> 
> Like I said, the only way I can describe it is the day before you go into a full-blown cold. You feel it coming on - sinuses running, chills, fatigue, burning eyes, and an overall crappy feeling. I've been feeling this way on and off since January. Over St. Patrick's Day week, I thought I was going into the full-blown cold (four out of seven musicians in the band were sick), but again, it did not materialize.
> 
> Here's the thing - I am so close to the surgery date that I can stick anything out for another month. I have more blood work coming up this month. I'll do whatever I have to in order for the surgery to happen. I need to get this grapefruit (okay, so it's not THAT big) out of my throat.
> 
> So close, and yet so far...


If your liver enzymes are being affected, your doc can change your antithyroid. You won't miss your surgery come hell or high water; no way!!

Band? Did I hear band? What am I missing here? Tell me it's 50's and 60's!! Ha, ha!


----------



## lavender

I was concerned about feeling ill the week before my surgery. Had abdominal pains that concerned me, and the Endo made me an appointment with my PCP. Her response was, "you're having this surgery, you need this thing out!" I agreed. I was not going to improve until it was gone, and I was right.

If your liver enzymes are elevated, there is time to adjust your meds now. I doubt it will postpone your surgery.

Methimazole is just a temporary measure to treat your condition for the time being. It's the surgery that will give you long term relief and let your body really heal.


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## Chase

It's an Irish pub band, actually. More power to your elbow!


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## Chase

Well, just got a call back from my endo. They want me over at the hospital ASAP for blood work (CBC), the results of which I am supposed to call them and immediately relay.

Also, he has stopped my methimazole as of today until they can get a handle on the blood work results. Once again, it is in moments like these that I love my doc, despite the fact that I have to see him because something is wrong.


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, just got a call back from my endo. They want me over at the hospital ASAP for blood work (CBC), the results of which I am supposed to call them and immediately relay.
> 
> Also, he has stopped my methimazole as of today until they can get a handle on the blood work results. Once again, it is in moments like these that I love my doc, despite the fact that I have to see him because something is wrong.


I am soooooooooooooooooooooooo glad you have talked to your doctor about this. So so glad.

Hey; you know I love that kind of music! The Irish blood runs deep in me!!


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## Chase

Well, the blood work came back okay. So, I guess all those years practicing with Guinness got my liver in shape for the assault.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, the blood work came back okay. So, I guess all those years practicing with Guinness got my liver in shape for the assault.


Too funny! Glad enzymes are good. What a relief! Better to be safe than sorry!


----------



## Chase

I'm glad, too!

I still feel crappy, though. I'm just going to chalk it up to the methimazole and the changes it causes. Either that, or it's just a bug that's hanging on which will be squashed by this newest round of antibiotics. Worst case is that I stick it all out until the surgery, and that I can do.

I am supposed to go see a hockey game in Cleveland tonight, but I don't think I have it in me to go. Just too long a night for my lack of energy. I had accepted the tickets a long time ago, but I think it would be dangerous for me to be driving when I'm so tired.

Plus, at night, driving is interesting since my eyes changed. Oncoming headlights are painful. My eye doc told me that's because the bulging in my eyes opens up the lens more. Thus, bright lights - sunlight and direct light as in headlights (makes me feel like a plant) - are not fun. I try to avoid driving at night when I can unless it's something relatively close. To drive 50 miles isn't wise for me tonight for a number of reasons.

Know thy limits.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I'm glad, too!
> 
> I still feel crappy, though. I'm just going to chalk it up to the methimazole and the changes it causes. Either that, or it's just a bug that's hanging on which will be squashed by this newest round of antibiotics. Worst case is that I stick it all out until the surgery, and that I can do.
> 
> I am supposed to go see a hockey game in Cleveland tonight, but I don't think I have it in me to go. Just too long a night for my lack of energy. I had accepted the tickets a long time ago, but I think it would be dangerous for me to be driving when I'm so tired.
> 
> Plus, at night, driving is interesting since my eyes changed. Oncoming headlights are painful. My eye doc told me that's because the bulging in my eyes opens up the lens more. Thus, bright lights - sunlight and direct light as in headlights (makes me feel like a plant) - are not fun. I try to avoid driving at night when I can unless it's something relatively close. To drive 50 miles isn't wise for me tonight for a number of reasons.
> 
> Know thy limits.


Wise decision; I once was driving home from work at night and lost vision in both eyes! The optic nerves were severely taxed at the time; eyes were so out of the orbits, they touched the lens of my glasses. Anyway, I hit the brakes, was able to pull over to the berm (little neighborhood side street thank God) and just sat there praying for my eyesight to return so I could get home which it did.

So, as I say.......................wise decision. Very!

Soon, you will put all your troubles behind you and life will be good again; I promise you that!

This is just a little interruption to the plan.


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## Chase

Well, I ended up going to the game after all. My nephew did the driving, which was just fine by me. We had a really great time. Glad I went, despite being tired. I love hockey, and it was kind of rejuvinating to see a game again. It's been years since I have gone due to work and life in general. It was as exciting as I remembered it being!

And I didn't have to drive, which made it all the better!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I ended up going to the game after all. My nephew did the driving, which was just fine by me. We had a really great time. Glad I went, despite being tired. I love hockey, and it was kind of rejuvinating to see a game again. It's been years since I have gone due to work and life in general. It was as exciting as I remembered it being!
> 
> And I didn't have to drive, which made it all the better!


Thank goodness for nephews who like hockey games too! That had to be "really" nice. Bonding w/ the nephew and enjoying a good game to boot!


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## Chase

Yeah, he's a great kid. Actually, he's not a kid anymore. He's 20, and I just adore him. We have a lot of fun together.


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## Chase

Just for the journal purpose of this whole shindig I'm having, I feel really worn down today. It took everything I had to get out of bed this morning, and I was late doing that. It's been a really rough week as far as lack of energy. I can only surmise that the increased methimazole dosage is definitely doing its job. I'll have to wait to get the numbers to prove it, though.

My blood test has been moved up to April 7th after I talked to my endo's nurse. It was originally scheduled for April 24th, but I was worried that might not be enough time before surgery if something had to be adjusted. So, I called the doc's office, and they agreed that it should be earlier.

I got the endo appointment moved up to April 28th, as well. That was originally scheduled for May 10, whereas the surgery was May 16. They agreed they wanted more time to address anything as needed with that one, too.

I will be having my pre-admin testing done May 9, where they'll do the now-infamous blood draw. (Damn, if I had a nickel for every time I've had blood drawn in this process...)

Then, it's off to one more visit with the surgeon to make sure everything is on track and to have her fill out my medical leave papers for work. (She has to guesstimate how long I will be off work - let's try for three weeks!). I turn those in to work and bide my time until my official date with my favorite friend, Mr. Anesthesia. 

So, there's how it stands for the moment.


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Yeah, he's a great kid. Actually, he's not a kid anymore. He's 20, and I just adore him. We have a lot of fun together.


Nope; 20 is all grown up!! Life is well under way by that time!

How are you feeling? How is that knee?


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## BRGB12X

I've had a sore throat for a couple weeks. The doctor said if I get a " sore throat" AND a "fever", let him know. I only have a sore throat, more like a tickle that I constantly have to clear. My doc can't seem to call back. Am I to believe that "just" a sore throat alone is ok???


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## BRGB12X

Just after last post I now have a low fever and sore throat.


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## Andros

BRGB12X said:


> Just after last post I now have a low fever and sore throat.


If you are on antithyroid med; you must call the doctor. By all means. You will have to get white blood cell count.

Major side effects - Fortunately, the major side effects of antithyroid drugs are very rare.

•Agranulocytosis - Agranulocytosis is a term used to describe a severe decrease in the production of white blood cells. This condition is extremely serious, but affects only one out of every 200 to 500 people who take an antithyroid drug. Elderly people taking PTU and those who take high doses of MMI may be at higher risk of this side effect.

Agranulocytosis almost always occurs within the first three months of starting treatment with an antithyroid drug. If you develop a sore throat, fever, or other signs or symptoms of infection, you should stop your medicine and immediately call your doctor or nurse. Serious and potentially life threatening infections, or even death, can occur before agranulocytosis resolves. However, once the antithyroid drug is stopped, agranulocytosis usually resolves within a week.

There "is" more so please read!
http://www.uptodate.com/contents/patient-information-antithyroid-drugs

Let us know and if for any reason at all you feel you need to, just get to the ER.

Will worry until we hear from you!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Just for the journal purpose of this whole shindig I'm having, I feel really worn down today. It took everything I had to get out of bed this morning, and I was late doing that. It's been a really rough week as far as lack of energy. I can only surmise that the increased methimazole dosage is definitely doing its job. I'll have to wait to get the numbers to prove it, though.
> 
> My blood test has been moved up to April 7th after I talked to my endo's nurse. It was originally scheduled for April 24th, but I was worried that might not be enough time before surgery if something had to be adjusted. So, I called the doc's office, and they agreed that it should be earlier.
> 
> I got the endo appointment moved up to April 28th, as well. That was originally scheduled for May 10, whereas the surgery was May 16. They agreed they wanted more time to address anything as needed with that one, too.
> 
> I will be having my pre-admin testing done May 9, where they'll do the now-infamous blood draw. (Damn, if I had a nickel for every time I've had blood drawn in this process...)
> 
> Then, it's off to one more visit with the surgeon to make sure everything is on track and to have her fill out my medical leave papers for work. (She has to guesstimate how long I will be off work - let's try for three weeks!). I turn those in to work and bide my time until my official date with my favorite friend, Mr. Anesthesia.
> 
> So, there's how it stands for the moment.


You have been through a lot. Soon all this will be behind you. If you can, try to get some much needed rest this weekend! You have a full plate; very full.

Can't wait for the cap and gown ceremony! Whooooooooooooooooohoo!


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## Chase

Y'know, that's exactly what I did this weekend. I never got out of my pajamas. I scrubbed my kitchen, which was the extent of my exertion this weekend. (It lifted my spirits to see a clean kitchen.) I caught up on some much-needed sleep, drove to the pharmacy drive-through in my jammies to pick up medication refills, and sat snuggling with the cats in my recliner while watching DVR'd shows that were piling up.

Despite the rest, my energy still feels low. There's not much to do about it, though. Based on the CBC from last week, my white cell count is fine. For good measure, I'm going to finish the antibiotic I've been prescribed just in case it's a sinus infection gone wrong.

On the bright side, I have managed to catch up on my hours for my internship, I think. This means I will graduate on time in May without a hitch. I have to write an ungodly long term paper to describe it, but that's life. In five weeks, I won't care.

Then after that, it's off to surgery. I have cautiously started a countdown to it. I am allowing myself that luxury now that it's geting closer. I was afraid to do it before because something might derail it. As a precaution, I am avoiding areas that could endanger it. For example, my sister-in-law is in the hospital. I have been calling on the phone to see how she is, but I am not going to the hospital since there is a flu bug reemerging in this area. Call it selfish, but I'll be damned if I'm going to willingly expose myself to sick people.


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## Chase

Hey, BRGB, did you call your doc?


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Y'know, that's exactly what I did this weekend. I never got out of my pajamas. I scrubbed my kitchen, which was the extent of my exertion this weekend. (It lifted my spirits to see a clean kitchen.) I caught up on some much-needed sleep, drove to the pharmacy drive-through in my jammies to pick up medication refills, and sat snuggling with the cats in my recliner while watching DVR'd shows that were piling up.
> 
> Despite the rest, my energy still feels low. There's not much to do about it, though. Based on the CBC from last week, my white cell count is fine. For good measure, I'm going to finish the antibiotic I've been prescribed just in case it's a sinus infection gone wrong.
> 
> On the bright side, I have managed to catch up on my hours for my internship, I think. This means I will graduate on time in May without a hitch. I have to write an ungodly long term paper to describe it, but that's life. In five weeks, I won't care.
> 
> Then after that, it's off to surgery. I have cautiously started a countdown to it. I am allowing myself that luxury now that it's geting closer. I was afraid to do it before because something might derail it. As a precaution, I am avoiding areas that could endanger it. For example, my sister-in-law is in the hospital. I have been calling on the phone to see how she is, but I am not going to the hospital since there is a flu bug reemerging in this area. Call it selfish, but I'll be damned if I'm going to willingly expose myself to sick people.


That is the last thing you need is a flu bug. I don't call that selfish; I call that wise.

May is going to be a pivital month for you; always and ever!

It must be a Buckeye thing. If I clean something, I am deleriously happy! What's up w/that?? LOL!!


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## Chase

Yep, I think you're right that it's a Buckeye thing! Perhaps it's because this winter has dragged on more than usual. It was sort of warm enough to open the windows and let a little fresh air into the house. Today is even warmer, but it is due to turn to snow tonight (gotta love Ohio weather - 71 in the afternoon, snow by the evening).

As for being wise, I don't know about that. I really do think there's a thread of selfishness in it. I have decided that my life is about me at the moment, especially my health. If you had asked me about this six months ago, I would have gone to see someone in the hospital in a march. Now, I'm thinking twice about it. I'm getting tired of being tired. And this sister-in-law isn't critical or anything. A phone call will suffice, in my opinion. None of the current circumstance is worth risking another infection as far as I'm concerned.

And you know the funny thing? I don't want people coming to see me when I'M in the hospital, either! Good Lord, but that's a drag for anyone who feels obligated to go visit anyone other than a new mother. First, the parking deck rates are ridiculous. It's a long walk to anywhere you need to go, and the chairs are uncomfortable as hell.

I think there should be a rule that says sick people should be allowed to rest with no visitors except maybe your health POA, especially after surgery. I swear, I will be kicking everyone out of the room so I can enjoy a nice narcotic cocktail until they take it away from me. And even then, it will be quick. I'll be out of the hospital in 23 hours. What's the sense in visiting someone who's only in for that long?

They can send me a case of Guinness when I'm home to help me recover.


----------



## Chase

Took another blood test yesterday. Waiting on those results. My thyroid feels really swollen again today. It has since yesterday, as a matter of fact.

I also turned in the medical release form to the surgeon yesterday for my work. The doc has to fill it out before the surgery so work can have an estimate of how long I'll be off. I have 14 weeks of sick leave available, so no worries there. I told them that, so they know it's not an issue for whatever estimate the doc wants to put on there.

So, it's definitely starting to get closer now. I'm tentatively getting things moving in that direction, like giving the surgeon the time off paperwork. Better to do it now than last minute.

I'm also getting it done now because I can feel my energy slipping more lately. It's taking everything I have in the morning to get out of bed to go to work. I didn't even hear the alarm clock this morning. Thankfully, Gus the cat decided to jump onto the bed from a nearby dresser, landing near my head. That'll wake you up at any hour!

So, that's me for today. I'll post blood work results when I get them. I'm thinking my T3 is going to be a lot lower than it has been since I pretty much feel like a slug lately.


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Took another blood test yesterday. Waiting on those results. My thyroid feels really swollen again today. It has since yesterday, as a matter of fact.
> 
> I also turned in the medical release form to the surgeon yesterday for my work. The doc has to fill it out before the surgery so work can have an estimate of how long I'll be off. I have 14 weeks of sick leave available, so no worries there. I told them that, so they know it's not an issue for whatever estimate the doc wants to put on there.
> 
> So, it's definitely starting to get closer now. I'm tentatively getting things moving in that direction, like giving the surgeon the time off paperwork. Better to do it now than last minute.
> 
> I'm also getting it done now because I can feel my energy slipping more lately. It's taking everything I have in the morning to get out of bed to go to work. I didn't even hear the alarm clock this morning. Thankfully, Gus the cat decided to jump onto the bed from a nearby dresser, landing near my head. That'll wake you up at any hour!
> 
> So, that's me for today. I'll post blood work results when I get them. I'm thinking my T3 is going to be a lot lower than it has been since I pretty much feel like a slug lately.


We are going to have a party and the guest of honor will be your thyroid in a jug of formaldehyde!! Ha, ha!hugs6

Won't you be glad?

Will be ever so glad to have a look see at the results and ranges when they come in.


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## Chase

I'm hoping to hear back from the doc today on the results. This will be the period of fine adjustment, I think, with the methimazole. Funny how long it takes for those numbers to fluctuate with changes to the dosage!

And I wonder if they'd actually give my thyroid to me in a jar - what a conversation piece that'd be!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> I'm hoping to hear back from the doc today on the results. This will be the period of fine adjustment, I think, with the methimazole. Funny how long it takes for those numbers to fluctuate with changes to the dosage!
> 
> And I wonder if they'd actually give my thyroid to me in a jar - what a conversation piece that'd be!


It's your thyroid. Ha, ha!! Soon all your adjustments will be a moot point and you won't have to worry about that any longer.

I can say that titrating thyroid replacement is a whole lot easier. Especially with having all the fine folks on this board to help if need be.


----------



## midgetmaid

My husband asked for his gall stones because our boys wanted to see them, and the surgeon gave them to him.

Renee


----------



## Chase

Yep, the doc brought my sister's stone out to us - just to show us the size. It was bigger than a plum, which explained why she was in such pain!

She still has it in a jar. 

I think I said this before, but if I thought they'd film my surgery, I'd be all over that in a heartbeat. It's just not something you see every day, y'know? If I have to go through it, I'd at least like to watch it at some point!


----------



## Chase

Well, I got a voicemail from the endo's office. Apparently, things are not lowering as they should. I have now been bumped up to 30 mg of methimazole a day. The nurse said my doc is not comfortable with the numbers being at the high register of the testing range and that he wants it a lot lower before surgery.

On the down side, I know I'm going to feel like a garden slug as opposed to a tortoise, like I do right now.

On the bright side, I feel like my doc is always in complete control of my care and is always looking out for me. Can't ask for more than that in this day and age.

I should be getting a call back with the results soon. I'll post those when they become available.


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## Chase

Ah, the new numbers are in! Everyone, get out your bingo cards!

TSH - .23 (.34 - 5.60)
T3 - 4.3 (2.4 - 4.2)
T4 - .81 (.58 - 1.64)

As I said, I have been upped on my medication back to 30mg, which I was originally on when I got diagnosed. As a wise man once said, wherever you go, there you are!


----------



## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I got a voicemail from the endo's office. Apparently, things are not lowering as they should. I have now been bumped up to 30 mg of methimazole a day. The nurse said my doc is not comfortable with the numbers being at the high register of the testing range and that he wants it a lot lower before surgery.
> 
> On the down side, I know I'm going to feel like a garden slug as opposed to a tortoise, like I do right now.
> 
> On the bright side, I feel like my doc is always in complete control of my care and is always looking out for me. Can't ask for more than that in this day and age.
> 
> I should be getting a call back with the results soon. I'll post those when they become available.


Feeling like a slug is way down low; I could not agree more. On the plus side, as you well know, your doctor does not want you to have a thyroxine dump during or after surgery.

I feel bad for you right now but the days and weeks keep on clipping away and before you know it, it will be but a very unfond memory!


----------



## Chase

Talk about extremes - this disease sure has them! I was looking at my log of test results yesterday. I started out with a T3 of 27. The thing is, after all these months, it has never dropped even a tenth of a point into the high normal range. I'm always hovering above it. Weird, eh?

Anyway, you are absolutely right - the days are getting knocked off one by one. So, every morning that I wake up is one day less I have to wait!

The memory issue is still rearing its ugly head from time to time. Somewhere between last Thursday and today, I lost my thumb drive that has my entire collegiate career on it, including my internship paper which is 20 pages long. I am pretty sure I had taken it out of my backpack and brought it into the house to work on it, but I couldn't remember where I put it if you put a gun to my head. I have protected that drive so carefully since going back to school. I do have a backup of most of the stuff that was on it except the internship paper. I have the sneaking suspicion I should start rewriting it now instead of waiting too long.

It is nuances like this I really don't care for some days. However, I am going to go home tonight and start searching for the drive. If I find it, I win a prize.


----------



## Chase

Got a call from my surgeon a few minutes ago. I had to have a form filled out estimating my time off from work so my company can make sure I have enough sick time available (I have plenty - over 14 weeks). They are putting on the form that I'll be out three weeks. I may not need the entire three weeks, but that's what they're giving me at the moment.

Can't complain.


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## Chase

My friends, I have finished the race...

Well, a big part of it. I took my last class yesterday at school, and I will graduate (finally!) this Saturday at 2:00 p.m. It has certainly been a long haul, one I was not sure I was going to be able to complete.

I found my lost thumb drive that had all my work on it, so I didn't have to rewrite my term papers. As a result, I will be getting As in two classes for sure with at least a B in the third, maybe higher. At this point, I don't really care, because I AM DONE!

I don't think I would have made it without the support of people around me and here who said to stick with it. So, I thank you folks for the encouragement. Damn, but this disease takes it out of you from time to time, especially on those mornings where it takes everything you have to get out of bed. I'm still having those days and more frequently at that, but on May 16, I will take another step in this journey. Barring unforeseen circumstaces, the thyroidectomy will proceed without a hitch. Then I can start getting back to the life I knew!

Speaking of the future, I met with my endo last week. Here's the plan:

- Post-operative, I will remain on methimazole for five days to guard against a thyroid storm.

- I will then go on levothyroxine at 200 micrograms a day. This is to get off some of the weight I have gained thanks to my gnarly thyroid. That level may be adjusted down the road, though, as things even out.

- They'll adjust the propranolol and lisinopril as needed after surgery. I may not need them at all, but they will decide that afterward once they're sure how everything is going.

- The occasional check-up with the endo every now and then, and I should be good to go!

I stop my Celebrex this coming Monday when I go for pre-admission testing. I will also have a new blood draw there for levels while I'm at it. (I love one-stop shopping.) Apparently, you have to stop Celeberex and stuff like it prior to surgery because they are blood thinners and can contribute to post-operative bleeding. This is the only drawback at this point, because I know the joint pain will ramp up once I'm off that for two days, maybe less. But, I will be back on it almost immediately following surgery from what I understand. So, just know if you're having surgery that you'll probably have to stop any medications that might fall into this category (NSAIDS). However, do so ONLY on the advice of your doc!

So, that's the situation at this point. I do believe that I am going to sleep in on Sunday, because I will have no papers due, and it will be my first full day of freedom! Even though I had a bit of melancholy leaving the University of Akron campus for the last time, the sun was shining brilliantly in the cloudless sky, perhaps a little reward for sticking it out and not giving up. Sometimes, the simplest gifts are the greatest.


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## Andros

Chase said:


> My friends, I have finished the race...
> 
> Well, a big part of it. I took my last class yesterday at school, and I will graduate (finally!) this Saturday at 2:00 p.m. It has certainly been a long haul, one I was not sure I was going to be able to complete.
> 
> I found my lost thumb drive that had all my work on it, so I didn't have to rewrite my term papers. As a result, I will be getting As in two classes for sure with at least a B in the third, maybe higher. At this point, I don't really care, because I AM DONE!
> 
> I don't think I would have made it without the support of people around me and here who said to stick with it. So, I thank you folks for the encouragement. Damn, but this disease takes it out of you from time to time, especially on those mornings where it takes everything you have to get out of bed. I'm still having those days and more frequently at that, but on May 16, I will take another step in this journey. Barring unforeseen circumstaces, the thyroidectomy will proceed without a hitch. Then I can start getting back to the life I knew!
> 
> Speaking of the future, I met with my endo last week. Here's the plan:
> 
> - Post-operative, I will remain on methimazole for five days to guard against a thyroid storm.
> 
> - I will then go on levothyroxine at 200 micrograms a day. This is to get off some of the weight I have gained thanks to my gnarly thyroid. That level may be adjusted down the road, though, as things even out.
> 
> - They'll adjust the propranolol and lisinopril as needed after surgery. I may not need them at all, but they will decide that afterward once they're sure how everything is going.
> 
> - The occasional check-up with the endo every now and then, and I should be good to go!
> 
> I stop my Celebrex this coming Monday when I go for pre-admission testing. I will also have a new blood draw there for levels while I'm at it. (I love one-stop shopping.) Apparently, you have to stop Celeberex and stuff like it prior to surgery because they are blood thinners and can contribute to post-operative bleeding. This is the only drawback at this point, because I know the joint pain will ramp up once I'm off that for two days, maybe less. But, I will be back on it almost immediately following surgery from what I understand. So, just know if you're having surgery that you'll probably have to stop any medications that might fall into this category (NSAIDS). However, do so ONLY on the advice of your doc!
> 
> So, that's the situation at this point. I do believe that I am going to sleep in on Sunday, because I will have no papers due, and it will be my first full day of freedom! Even though I had a bit of melancholy leaving the University of Akron campus for the last time, the sun was shining brilliantly in the cloudless sky, perhaps a little reward for sticking it out and not giving up. Sometimes, the simplest gifts are the greatest.





















































So good to hear from you and I want you to know my heart will be smiling for you tomorrow as you receive your diploma!

What is the date of your thyroid ablation?


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## Chase

Ooooh! Pretty balloons!!!!!

My fiendish thyroid will be removed next Monday, May 16!


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Ooooh! Pretty balloons!!!!!
> 
> My fiendish thyroid will be removed next Monday, May 16!


You are on my prayer list. And my thoughts will be with you! Boy, will you ever be glad. I kid you not!


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## Chase

Well, I took another step closer to surgery yesterday. I went for my pre-admission testing at the hospital.

For those of you who are considering a surgical option, I thought I'd walk you through the process from this point forward so you will know the gist of what is involved in the surgical route. Here is what happens with the pre-admission testing:

1. They take a detailed medical history, including prior surgeries and questions regarding any conditions you may have. This also includes any allergies you may have. For example, I have an allergy to codeine, so I make sure they know that right off the bat.

2. You submit a list of medications you take, including vitamins, supplements, and OTC stuff. I brought a printed list with me that included the title of the medication as it appears on the bottle (including any abbreviations and acronyms), the dosage, how many times a day I take it, and why it is taken. I can't remember where I put my car keys in the morning, much less what medications I take. It's also a good thing to give this list to a family member, just in case something happens and the docs need to know what you take and for what.

3. Your vitals are taken and recorded. Yes, they weigh you... so wear light clothing... and no shoes... and empty your pockets...

4. An EKG. This is done before most surgeries now, at least at my hospital. This involves putting a bunch of sticky tabs on your midriff and one on each leg. Then the EKG tech takes a reading. It takes longer to put the sticky tabs on than it does to do the actual test.

5. A talk with a nurse from the Anesthesia Department. She was there to explain every step in the process and answer any questions.

6. Blood draw. This was convenient, because I was due for my T3, T4, and TSH draw, as well that day. They will be doing all tests - surgical and endo -from the one sample, saving me a trip to another building!

7. Last but certainly not least, they asked if I had a living will and a durable health power of attorney. Up until this past November, I would not have given this a second thought about importance.

Then, my father became very ill, and I was the one who had to decide when to stop resuscitation efforts for him. I don't want anyone else in my family to have to go through that in the slim chance that something would go wrong with the surgery or with any other event, for that matter. So, I filled out living will paperwork that was available at my doctor's office. (Note: You have to have it notorized for it to be valid.)

Also, I filled out a durable health power of attorney because I have no husband and no kids. Due to HIPAA laws (the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) Privacy and Security Rules), doctors cannot technically talk to even members of your own family without your consent. Nor can family members speak soley on your behalf for your care unless you say it's okay. So, I filled out a durable health power of attorney form that specified a few of the members of my family who would be legally empowered to make health decisions for me should I become incapacitated. (Note: This also has to be notarized.)

Technically, when you're under anesthesia, you're incapacitated. So, I want and need someone in my corner at that time.

So, now I'm in a holding pattern until Monday. My surgery is at 8 a.m., which means that I have to be at the Same Day Surgery Center at 6 a.m. My expected stay in the hospital is 23 hours, provided there are no complications or concerns. Then, I will be off work for three weeks to recuperate. This length of time is mostly due to not being able to drive. You have to demonstrate full motion in your neck before the doc will release you.

But really - like I'm going to complain about three weeks off work? Sheeya, right! Just kidding. I think I am on the road to feeling a LOT better, as Andros said.

And I'll have a cool scar for Halloween...


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, I took another step closer to surgery yesterday. I went for my pre-admission testing at the hospital.
> 
> For those of you who are considering a surgical option, I thought I'd walk you through the process from this point forward so you will know the gist of what is involved in the surgical route. Here is what happens with the pre-admission testing:
> 
> 1. They take a detailed medical history, including prior surgeries and questions regarding any conditions you may have. This also includes any allergies you may have. For example, I have an allergy to codeine, so I make sure they know that right off the bat.
> 
> 2. You submit a list of medications you take, including vitamins, supplements, and OTC stuff. I brought a printed list with me that included the title of the medication as it appears on the bottle (including any abbreviations and acronyms), the dosage, how many times a day I take it, and why it is taken. I can't remember where I put my car keys in the morning, much less what medications I take. It's also a good thing to give this list to a family member, just in case something happens and the docs need to know what you take and for what.
> 
> 3. Your vitals are taken and recorded. Yes, they weigh you... so wear light clothing... and no shoes... and empty your pockets...
> 
> 4. An EKG. This is done before most surgeries now, at least at my hospital. This involves putting a bunch of sticky tabs on your midriff and one on each leg. Then the EKG tech takes a reading. It takes longer to put the sticky tabs on than it does to do the actual test.
> 
> 5. A talk with a nurse from the Anesthesia Department. She was there to explain every step in the process and answer any questions.
> 
> 6. Blood draw. This was convenient, because I was due for my T3, T4, and TSH draw, as well that day. They will be doing all tests - surgical and endo -from the one sample, saving me a trip to another building!
> 
> 7. Last but certainly not least, they asked if I had a living will and a durable health power of attorney. Up until this past November, I would not have given this a second thought about importance.
> 
> Then, my father became very ill, and I was the one who had to decide when to stop resuscitation efforts for him. I don't want anyone else in my family to have to go through that in the slim chance that something would go wrong with the surgery or with any other event, for that matter. So, I filled out living will paperwork that was available at my doctor's office. (Note: You have to have it notorized for it to be valid.)
> 
> Also, I filled out a durable health power of attorney because I have no husband and no kids. Due to HIPAA laws (the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) Privacy and Security Rules), doctors cannot technically talk to even members of your own family without your consent. Nor can family members speak soley on your behalf for your care unless you say it's okay. So, I filled out a durable health power of attorney form that specified a few of the members of my family who would be legally empowered to make health decisions for me should I become incapacitated. (Note: This also has to be notarized.)
> 
> Technically, when you're under anesthesia, you're incapacitated. So, I want and need someone in my corner at that time.
> 
> So, now I'm in a holding pattern until Monday. My surgery is at 8 a.m., which means that I have to be at the Same Day Surgery Center at 6 a.m. My expected stay in the hospital is 23 hours, provided there are no complications or concerns. Then, I will be off work for three weeks to recuperate. This length of time is mostly due to not being able to drive. You have to demonstrate full motion in your neck before the doc will release you.
> 
> But really - like I'm going to complain about three weeks off work? Sheeya, right! Just kidding. I think I am on the road to feeling a LOT better, as Andros said.
> 
> And I'll have a cool scar for Halloween...


Believe it or not, I was just looking at my wall calendar where I have the 16th. marked and was thinking of you!

Sounds like you are good to go. I will be with you in spirit and prayer! You are going to be great! The best patient they ever had!!!

And you "are" going to feel terrific very soon. It will take a while to heal by you will and each day will be a better day for you!!

Sending many hugs,


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## Chase

Thanks, Andros! I believe this is the best option for me. I agree that I will be feeling much better when this is all done!


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## Andros

Our dear and very humorous friend Chase is having her thyroid out today probably as I type this! (Monday, May 16, 2011)

Let's all rally and send her some good vibes, cheer and good thoughts!

Hope all goes well and can't wait to hear from her.


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## Chase

Well, it is official - I survived.  Thank you for the good vibes. They found me!

A couple of interesting developments occurred with the surgery. First, there was a bit of an issue getting through previous scar tissue on my neck, which extended the surgery time by almost an hour (they were going to enter through a previous bronchoscopy scar).

Then, when they got in there, my thyroid had grown quite a bit since the scan in November. This meant extending the incision to remove the thyroid. After getting a good look at the thyroid, my surgeon said there was no doubt that it was Graves' disease and that it was a wonder that I could even swallow food. So, that was pretty validating for me in a weird sort of way. There comes the point where you wonder if you're getting bogged down in the overall debilitating effects of the disease.

One thing I noticed right off the bat was that my throat didn't feel closed off anymore. I can swallow without difficulty, despite the swelling from the surgery. Truly amazing!

True to their word, I was discharged from the hospital 23 hours later, but not before I received the best care I could ever have hoped for in a hospital. The staff took such great care of me, from the nurses to the food staff to the transport folks to the admins. It was an incredibly positive experience for me, and I could not have asked for anything more.

Right now, I will admit that I miss my morphine injections, because there are some pretty uncomfortable moments. The worst I had to deal with was today when the drain was removed. While it was quick to do, you feel every inch of that tube coming out of the wound. However, that Little-Hug-shaped thing serves a mighty big purpose in keeping the fluid out of the incision area. It's more of a burn than a pain when it is being removed. More on this later.

I am going to go lay down now, I think. The painkiller are starting to kick in, and I need to find a comfortable position before I completely zonk. I will post some more information tomorrow, since I have quite a while off to talk to the world. 

Thank you for all the support to this point. It has helped so much, and I hope to return the favor to someone who is going through the same thing.


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## Andros

Chase said:


> Well, it is official - I survived.  Thank you for the good vibes. They found me!
> 
> A couple of interesting developments occurred with the surgery. First, there was a bit of an issue getting through previous scar tissue on my neck, which extended the surgery time by almost an hour (they were going to enter through a previous bronchoscopy scar).
> 
> Then, when they got in there, my thyroid had grown quite a bit since the scan in November. This meant extending the incision to remove the thyroid. After getting a good look at the thyroid, my surgeon said there was no doubt that it was Graves' disease and that it was a wonder that I could even swallow food. So, that was pretty validating for me in a weird sort of way. There comes the point where you wonder if you're getting bogged down in the overall debilitating effects of the disease.
> 
> One thing I noticed right off the bat was that my throat didn't feel closed off anymore. I can swallow without difficulty, despite the swelling from the surgery. Truly amazing!
> 
> True to their word, I was discharged from the hospital 23 hours later, but not before I received the best care I could ever have hoped for in a hospital. The staff took such great care of me, from the nurses to the food staff to the transport folks to the admins. It was an incredibly positive experience for me, and I could not have asked for anything more.
> 
> Right now, I will admit that I miss my morphine injections, because there are some pretty uncomfortable moments. The worst I had to deal with was today when the drain was removed. While it was quick to do, you feel every inch of that tube coming out of the wound. However, that Little-Hug-shaped thing serves a mighty big purpose in keeping the fluid out of the incision area. It's more of a burn than a pain when it is being removed. More on this later.
> 
> I am going to go lay down now, I think. The painkiller are starting to kick in, and I need to find a comfortable position before I completely zonk. I will post some more information tomorrow, since I have quite a while off to talk to the world.
> 
> Thank you for all the support to this point. It has helped so much, and I hope to return the favor to someone who is going through the same thing.


Oh,man!! So so good to hear from you so soon. Can you ice down your incision area? You must keep it dry, of course.

It is a darn good thing you got that big ol' thing out. It was just happily growing and growing.










Pamper yourself to the max! You deserve it. Bet you can sleep better too? Were you having sleep apnea?


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## Chase

I am noticing all kinds of differences. Yes, I seem to sleep better now! Also, just the overall ability to swallow is amazing.

One thing that did occur post-surgery was that I am apparently in the throes of a thyroid storm from the thyroidectomy. The night of the surgery, my heart started acting wild. They ran an EKG for good measure, but my surgeon confirmed for me the next morning that it will take a few days for the hormone release to settle down. As was already planned, I am on the methimazole for the next five days to keep the symptoms down, but it's definitely noticeable. Kinda like sticking your finger in a light socket at times. 

Today was a tough day, as it is many times on the second day following surgery. I have managed to get some good sleep in today, though, and that has helped a lot. I took a shower this morning, which felt soooo good. The drain incision has stopped oozing for the most part, so I think I will be able to get rid of that bandage by tomorrow some time. The main incisision, itself, feels tight today, and I have to be careful how fast I turn my head to the side.

One of the best pieces of medicine I have going is ice. Ice packs on the incision are a blessing in both reducing the swelling and in just how good it feels. Combine that with some really good vanilla ice cream, Vicodin, and it's a good world from time to time. 

Also, I have been faithful to working the spirometer they give you following surgery to help prevent against pneumonia. While you feel kinda stupid doing it because the contraption, itself, looks goofy, it really is important to get the crap in your lungs out as best you can so it doesn't cause problems down the road. So, just in case anyone was wondering, I'm being a good patient and am doing all the right things. While there are rough moments, I don't regret one minute of doing this. I know I am on the road to wellness, and I have been looking forward to this for a long, long time!

Again, thank you for the good vibes. They have meant much!


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## Barlie

Great attitude sweetie!!! No matter how bad...others have got it worse. I'm with you on being able to deal with the known problem, not so good with the unknown. I have been on Tapazole for 8 years with Lavoxyl and have had no further problems. I didn't remove mine, I figured the eye surgery so I could see without extreme double vision was enough for me. LMAO on the "Halloween scar"!!! I can relate. My right eye pulled down so far the pupil was going beneath the lower lid. The neighborhood kids thought it was a great Halloween trick  The people on here are wonderful. They helped me feel better when I would feel freaky. Hope all is going good now


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## Andros

Barlie said:


> Great attitude sweetie!!! No matter how bad...others have got it worse. I'm with you on being able to deal with the known problem, not so good with the unknown. I have been on Tapazole for 8 years with Lavoxyl and have had no further problems. I didn't remove mine, I figured the eye surgery so I could see without extreme double vision was enough for me. LMAO on the "Halloween scar"!!! I can relate. My right eye pulled down so far the pupil was going beneath the lower lid. The neighborhood kids thought it was a great Halloween trick  The people on here are wonderful. They helped me feel better when I would feel freaky. Hope all is going good now


Welcome Barlie and thank you for your encouraging post to our poster!! LOL!!

I am sorry to hear about your eyes! Did you have orbital decompression surgery, strabisimus surgery or something else? Both eyes or just one?

What do your labs look like? Have you ever had any antibodies' tests?


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## Momto2boys

Chase,

You sound just like me! I was tired of felling plain yucky but thought it was all hormones since I had a hysterectomy in 2009 but nope it was Hyper with GD! I should have either surgery or RAI by the end of the month. I was pushing for RAI till my Endo explained that its not a full cure for GD and that it's best to take the thyroid out cause even a dead organ can cause havoc and there is no way to know for sure if the GD will start attacking it again even thou it's dead. I try to remember I don't have Hyper I have GD first and foremost and from that came the Hyperthyroidism. If there was a cure for GD I would gladly jump on that band wagon but I have yet to find anything.


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## webster2

Momto2boys said:


> Chase,
> 
> You sound just like me! I was tired of felling plain yucky but thought it was all hormones since I had a hysterectomy in 2009 but nope it was Hyper with GD! I should have either surgery or RAI by the end of the month. I was pushing for RAI till my Endo explained that its not a full cure for GD and that it's best to take the thyroid out cause even a dead organ can cause havoc and there is no way to know for sure if the GD will start attacking it again even thou it's dead. I try to remember I don't have Hyper I have GD first and foremost and from that came the Hyperthyroidism. If there was a cure for GD I would gladly jump on that band wagon but I have yet to find anything.


Hi, and welcome!

I am recently diagnosed with GD too in May. I thought it was menopause causing all of my strange symptoms. I was really POed at Mother Nature since I had had a hysterectomy in 2007, and thought menopause would not visit, maybe it didn't!

I did the research on what the best way for me to treat this, and get back into life. I have no energy at all. Surgery is scheduled for later this month. I have only a bit of eye trouble. Well, I guess I mean they are not bulging. They are painful, and very sensitive to light. Sometimes teary sometimes dry.

Best wishes to you. You have come to the best places for answers and kind words.
Sue


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